#i also haven't read the last two (two already

[mikimakiboo]

CAVE CANEM DRACONTEM

-> beware of the dog dragon

Draz Nightmare is very cute and I've been rambling with @ancha-aus in the notes again so here I am writing yet another fic when I already have three to work on

Please read it because I've been fighting for my life while writing it, just search #spider war and you will see

For those who haven't seen the baby, I doodled him

Ancha also wrote a tiny drabble that is just adorable !!!!! A very nice take on the situation !!! :D

Tw: cute baby dragon, rape allegory, yes I know these two warnings are horrible next to each other but I promise it's not that bad, I just have to warn about it because that's still a trigger, also injuries and reference to past abuse

Finished writing at 4am 👍🏻

Guardians were ancient creatures, created to protect, it wasn't rare for them to be more... creature-like than human-like, though they did have a more human form as to blend in better with the mortals, as to not scare them. The most frequent creatures were dragons, fierce and strong animals spitting fire, fearless and feared by all. Most guardians were dragon breeds.

Nightmare wasn't an exception to the rule. No one had ever seen his dragon form, but it was rumored to be gigantic, so strong it could destroy buildings with one whiplash from its tail, its fire so hot it could melt the stone of the mountains, so large it could eat you whole without needing to chew... needless to say, nobody ever tried to see the dragon, and Nightmare never had to show it to anyone, not even his own gang.

They did try to question him, curious, to beg him to show them his dragon form, but Nightmare always refused, stating that it was too dangerous and he didn't want to hurt them by accident, and, well, Nightmare was known to never lie, so they didn't push it and accepted that they would never see their boss turn into a dragon.

But fate has never been on Nightmare's side, he should have known that by now.

The balance hadn't been doing great these past few weeks, negativity levels were low, giving Dream and his team more power, making Nightmare's team struggle more to create enough negativity for the guardian. He was tired, his reserves were low, he couldn't keep pulling on them, he had to rest, to revert back to his primal form for a while and regain some energy. He didn't want to do that, he didn't want anyone to see the dragon, but if he kept delaying the tranformation he would end up reverting in a place where he wouldn't have been prepared to.

He sighed, standing up, he needed to find a hidden room in his castle where he wouldn't be bothered by anyone, a room where he could hide for a while, hopefully not too long as to not worry his teammates, maybe for a night, then he would turn back into a skeleton and act normal during the day. No one would have to see him.

Having selected and rearranged the room, he quickly made sure nobody was around and reverted to his dragon form, letting his magic wrap him in a flashing purple-ish light to reveal the beast, and laid down on his nest get some hours of rest...

Killer was the last to wake up in the morning, as usual, and went straight to the kitchen where Dust was on his phone drinking his coffee, Horror unloading the dishwasher after having programmed it to run during the night. Cross was most likely on his morning jog, honestly, how he managed to have so much energy this early in the morning was a mystery to everyone in this castle, even Nightmare didn't wake up this early, and God knew how much he hated sleeping in. Speaking of the boss, shouldn't he have been drinking his coffee too ? Killer didn't spot his mug in the sink.

- Nightmare's still sleeping ? He yawned, sitting down on his spot around the small table. Shouldn't we wake him up ?

- I already checked, he's not in his room, he probably slept in his office again, Dust replied without looking away from his phone.

It wasn't unusual for Nightmare to sleep in his office, he did tend pretty often to overwork himself.

- Mh.. I'll go see if he needs anything, Killer declared, getting up again.

As much as their boss wanted them to take care of themselves, he wasn't the best at it, "do what I say, not what I do" kind of deal, so every once in a while they would check up on him and make sure he at least slept and ate. They knew that technically he didn't need either of those, but it never hurt and was always a nice bonus for when negativity in the multiverse was low, like currently, so Killer walked all the way towards the wooden door and knocked.

- Boss ? You're in there ?

He waited, but didn't receive any answer.

- Sleeping on your desk again ? He asked more for himself, I'm coming in.

He grabbed the handle and slowly pushed the door open in case Nightmare was in fact sleeping, not wanting to make too much noise, but found the desk empty of any sleeping skeleton.

- Nightmare ?

He looked around, but the office was definitely empty. Maybe he was in his library ? Killer teleported there as it was all the way across the castle and it was still too early to walk this far in his opinion. He arrived in what surely was the biggest room of the castle and, to his surprise, it was plunged in the darkness, not one light was on, and even if Nightmare did have a better night vision than them he still turned the lights on when he was doing something as to not tire his only good eye, so the fact the room was dark was enough to tell Killer his boss wasn't there either. He teleported back in the kitchen. Cross had come back from his run and was drinking some lemon water.

- Nightmare's not there, he announced, earning three confused looks from his teammates.

- What do you mean he's not there ? Dust asked.

- I mean he's not there, I checked his office and the library and he's not in either of those, and we all know that's, like, the only rooms he spends his time in aside from the living room and his bedroom.

- Maybe he went for a walk ? Cross supposed.

- Cross, you're the only one in this castle going for a walk in the morning, Dust answered deadpanned.

- Sorry for wanting to stay in shape ? Cross frowned.

- Where could he be then... ? Horror asked, redirecting the conversation towards the principle subject: Nightmare.

Killer shrugged, he didn't see where Nightmare could have headed to, he rarely left the universe without them and usually wasn't that far in the castle so they could always reach him rapidly if there was a problem that way. So apart from the rooms he already checked ? Killer had no idea where his boss could have hidden himself, and given his weaker situation at the moment, he hoped it didn't mean anything bad...

- We should look for him... Horror finally decided for all of them, no doubt having concluded the same thing as Killer.

The others nodded and Dust got up, putting his empty cup in the sink to wash later.

- I say we all take one floor and the first to find him calls the others, Cross suggested.

- Works good for me, Killer agreed.

He saw Horror nod and Dust answered with a "sure". After agreeing on which floor everyone would go Killer teleported on the fourth one. They almsot never used that floor, the kitchen and living room they used were on the first floor as well as the training rooms, the library and the nursery, on the second floor were their bedrooms with attached bathrooms and Nightmare's office, and on the third floor were extra storage rooms and an old ball room with small saloons for the majority unused. Which left the fourth floor with its empty rooms and closets and the access to the rooftop. Needless to say, this floor would be quick to look throught.

Killer had opened half of the rooms, and still no sign of his boss, he was starting to think he did went out for a walk at this point. He stopped in front of a closet door, debating if he should open it or not, after all what would Nightmare do in a dusty closet ? But he had nothing to lose anyway, so he opened the door an looked inside. The closet was empty, aside from a pile of covers on the floor, which wouldn't have been that strange if only the covers were dirty, but they seemed clean with no particles of dust on them. Killer frowned, looking at the pile for a few seconds before crounching down and slowly reaching out to move one aside, before freezing when he saw what was underneath...

- Oh.. my.. god... he took out his phone and called the group chat, guys, guys you've gotta come see that, fourth floor, closet in the fifth corridor on the right, hurry.. !

He hung up, took two steps back, and waited for the others to arrive. They didn't take too long, alerted and worried by the call.

- What's wrong !? Did you find Nightmare !? Cross yelled after teleporting.

Killer quickly turned around with a finger in front of his mouth, inquiring them to be silent and come closer. The three shot each other worried looks before doing as told and coming next to Killer, looking inside the closet...

Under the covers was... a cat ? No, it wasn't a cat, thought it was roughly the same size, maybe slightly larger, but only a little. It had black fur, big pointy ears, a short chubby tail and two horns seemingly made of dark wood. It seemed to be asleep...

- What's this... ? Horror asked, but no one could answer.

- It's waking up... ! Dust whisper-screamed, seeing the creature start to move.

They all watched closely, ready to defend themselves if the thing attacked. The creature wiggled a little before yawning and opening its only eye, revealing a bright cyan eyelight. They knew that eyelight... the creature- ... Nightmare.. ? Slowly looked up to them, batting an ear, before sneezing due to the dust, a little blue flame coming out of its his mouth. Killer was the first to make the connection.

- Oh fuck... I think.. It's Nightmare's dragon form...

The small dragon perked his ears and looked up at him, as if recognizing his name. Cross passed out, Horror barely had time to catch him before he hit the ground.

- What.. are we supposed to do... ? Dust asked, not deviating his gaze from the small fluffy dragon.

- I have no idea... Killer admitted, just as lost as the others.

They didn't expect anything like that, it was kind of underwhelming to be honest, they were so sure their boss's dragon form was this gigantic beast he kept describing, only to be met with this fur ball instead ? He was incredibly cute, that was for sure, but they just... didn't expect that. Was it because of the lack of negativity ?

Cross came back to his senses just in time for the dragon to stand up, stretch his small and chubby legs like a cat, and trip over the covers when trying to get down, rolling forward on his back, paws in the air. He had dark purple toe beans. Cross passed out again.

The dragon rolled over on his belly, standing up again, and turned to look at them, sitting down, he seemed to analyze them.

- Uh... hi ? Killer tried with a wave and an awkward smile.

The dragon barked. God he wanted to squeeze him so badly. Was Nightmare still conscious in there or was the dragon a sort of alter-ego ? Did the dragon have Nightmare's memories ? Should they call him Nightmare too ? He did seem to recognize the name, so surely yes.

- It's uh.. Dust began, quite dirty in there, don't you want to go, like, in the living room or something ?

Nightmare looked up at him, slowly stood up, blinked, and sprinted past them.

- No wait come back ! Dust called, trying to grab him but missing.

- Does he remember the castle... ? Horror asked, holding Cross against him.

- I don't know and I don't want to wait for him to get lost ! Killer replied, teleporting in front of the dragon.

Nightmare yelped, stopping abruptly when seeing the skeleton in front of him, he slid on a good two meters before managing to run the other way around, but Dust was quicker than him this time and grabbed him before he could go full speed again. The little dragon squirmed in his hold, growling and spitting small fire balls.

- It's okay, calm down.. ! It's me, I'm not gonna hurt you.. ! Dust tried to reassure the angry dragon he held at arm's length.

Nightmare eventually calmed down, panting, no doubt still tired, and only growled with his ears down on each side of his head. Dust sighed, holding him closer to his chest to better grab him, putting an arm under his back legs.

- Oookay, everything's fine, we're just.. we're gonna go back to the living room and see what we should do.. Dust decided, heading towards the stairs with the others following him.

Everyone walked in silence, Cross having regained his consciousness, and arrived in the living room. Nightmare had stopped growling. Dust stopped in front of the couch.

- Please don't run off, he begged, slowly putting his small cargo down on the mattress.

Nightmare faced the back of the couch for a while before slowly turning around, marking a pause, and jumping from the couch. Killer caught him mid-air.

- Okay air jail for you, he declared keeping him in his arms

Nightmare whined, but didn't try to move. His fur was very soft, Killer noticed.

- So.. What should we do.. ? Horror asked, sitting down on the armchair.

Cross was still standing, staring at the dragon with a mix of awe and incredulity, Killer could understand, he too couldn't believe what he was holding at the moment. Their boss, the greatly feared Nightmare, guardian of negativity, ancient dragon breed, was not bigger than a cat and as fluffy as a plush. Why did he never tell them that ? Killer could understand not telling the multiverse, as it wouldn't have helped his image, but them ? His teammates ? His friends ? He would have thought they were well above the image, above the reputation, that he would have told them the truth. Unless this wasn't his true form but a result of his current weakness, and in that case, he didn't really want to leave the little dragon wandering in the castle on his own and risk getting hurt.

- I don't know... we should probably keep an eye on him ? I mean the castle's big and full of dangerous things and he's, well, not big, plus now's not the perfect time for him to hurt himself.

- Don't you think Nightmare will get mad that we sorta babysat him ? Cross worried.

Killer frowned for a second, not having thought of the possibility that Nightmare would be mad at them for that. He surely would, but would it be that bad ? It wasn't like they were planning on showing him to the world, just keep an eye on him until he transformed back, surely he would understand.

- Yeah well I prefer Nightmare being mad rather than him hurting himself, Dust answered before Killer could.

He simply nodded, stating he agreed with his friend.

- Hm.. you're probably right.. Cross agreed too, I'm gonna go check if I have a sweater or something to keep him warm, it's pretty cold in the castle.

- He's a dragon.. ? Horror asked, confused as to how a dragon would get cold.

- I don't want to risk it, Cross stated as he made his way towards his room.

Horror didn't insist, Cross seemed too determined anyway to get Nightmare in a sweater, and he had to admit the thought of seeing the small dragon in a little sweater was rather cute, so they all waited for the monochromatic skeleton to return. He luckily didn't take too much time.

- I've got one ! I think it was mine when I was a kid ? Anyway it should fit him well, he announced, stepping back into the living room.

Killer looked at the sweater, it was a plain black one, totally Nightmare's style.

- I'll hold him so you can put it on, Killer told him.

He sat on the couch, putting Nightmare on his laps in a sitting position, holding him by the sides, the dragon looked up at him curiously. Cross stood in front of him, rolling the sleeves of the sweater to make it easier to slip on, and gently grabbed the first paw to pass it in the first hole. Nightmare growled, his ears back, as Cross slowly manipulated him.

- It's okay, it's okay, I'm almost done.. he tried to reassure as he passed the sweater around the dragon's head.

Cross put the sweater in place, giving a little pat on Nightmare's head to congratulate him for not moving, before his gaze met his back paws. He poked the purple bean with a finger without thinking and saw Nightmare flinch and stare at his own paw with surprise.

- S-sorry, i-it was too tempting.. ! He apologized, blushing in embarrassment.

Nightmare stared for another second, then stretched his toes.

- ... I'm gonna pass out.

- Again ? Dust snorted.

- Yeah... Cross sighed, but he's so damn cute.. !

Of course, everyone agreed. This little dragon, as surprising and unfitting for Nightmare as he was, was frankly adorable with his little sweater and his big curious eyelight looking around the room. He surely rarely had the opportunity to explore the castle, but even when not knowing his surroundings very well, he didn't seem outwardly scared of them, he was cautious, but he had seemed to recognize them a little, at least enough not to attack. How much of Nightmare's memories did he have ? Killer saw him sniff a few times, did he recognize stuff through scents and that was why he knew who they were ? Because he remembered their odor and knew they were friends ? They would need to ask Nightmare, the skeleton, when he would be back. They would need to ask him a lot of things.

They all turned when they heard a grumble coming from the dragon.

- You're hungry.. ? Horror asked him with a found smile.

Nightmare looked up at him.

- Well, he did skip breakfast, Killer noted.

- What do dragons even eat ? Dust rightfully asked.

- Probably meat ? Cross answered, uncertain, I mean he's a predator so...

- I think we have some ham left... Horror thought, standing up.

He headed to the kitchen, the dragon's gaze following him until he started wiggling to be set free.

- Okay okay I'm putting you down ! Relax ! Killer quickly put him on the ground, not wanting his claws to shred him to pieces.

Nightmare sprinted to catch up to the big skeleton who had stopped to wait for his tiny boss. He chuckled when seeing him arrive and went to the fridge. The dragon went straight into the first shelf, searching for something interesting as he could smell the different foods. He unfortunately got grabbed before he could bit into a sausage and saw the door of the fridge closing in front of his eye, making him whine. He rapidly forgot about the fridge once Horror put him on a chair and handed him a piece of ham that he quickly bit into to eat with a little "nom" noise. Another piece followed after the first one and the tiny dragon happily enjoyed a full slice of ham for breakfast.

The others eventually joined them in the kitchen, wanting to see the dragon eat and just see the dragon in general as it would probably be the one and only time they would see him. The dragon looked at them for a minute before jumping down from his chair and going to explore the kitchen more in depth. He sniffed the cabinets, sniffed the table, the chairs, sniffed the trash can, frowned, sniffed the pedal, stepped on it, and jumped when the lid opened, running to hide behind the closest pair of legs he could find: Dust's. The skeleton bent down to lift him up.

- It's okay buddy, the trashcan won't hurt you, he laughed, petting the dragon's head.

Nightmare let him do so, slightly growling at the scary trashcan still.

- We're gonna go back to the living room, okay ? Dust reassured, leaving the kitchen with the two other skeletons, Horror staying to start preparing dinner as the search took a while and it was already almost noon.

Dust sat on the couch, keeping Nightmare on his laps.

- Can I pet him ? Cross asked, almost having stars in his eyes.

Dust looked up at him.

- Sure ? I mean, if he lets you.

Cross quickly nodded, crounching down in front of the dragon to let him sniff his hand in a silent demand for authorization. Nightmare looked at him, and gently headbutted his hand.

- Ooooh my God.. ! Cross exclaimed in a whisper, tearing up.

He gently scratched the little head, petting behind the ears, under the chin, ... a low rumble started to get heard.

- Oh shit.. guys he's purring.. ! Dust realized, feeling the small vibrations on his legs.

- He is ?! Killer put a hand on Nightmare's back.

He could feel the vibrations as he pat his back, near the tail as he would do with a cat. The little dragon purred louder, his eye closed. Soon he had six hands petting him. He started knitting on Dust's laps, feeling perfectly content with the attention.

- Ouch, Dust flinched, okay, sharp claws.

Killer snorted.

- You'll get used to it.

The petting session lasted until it was time for dinner, Cross and Killer went to help set up the table and Dust carefully moved Nightmare from his legs to the couch.

- We'll be right back in an instant, okay ? You can stay on the couch, he informed with a last pat on the head.

Dinner was simple, a steak with some vegetables on the side, but they all happily ate it. Horror always managed to make even the simplest meals taste delicious. Killer felt something against his leg, looking down he saw the tiny dragon standing up against his chair.

- Yeah ? Need anything ? He asked him.

The dragon looked at him, crounched down, seemed to calculate something, and jumped on his laps.

- Oh ! Well, okay then, guess you can sleep here, he chuckled.

Nightmare turned around to face the table, looking at the plate in front of him. He squinted.

- Comfortable ? Killer asked.

Nightmare only turned an ear, already focused on his plan. He slowly bent forward, eye fixated on his target, and swiftly snatched the steak in the plate before jumping off of Killer's laps and running out of the room, steak in his mouth.

- Wait, no ! Killer exclaimed, trying to grab him before he ran off, my steak !

He quickly got up to chase after the dragon, hearing the others laugh at his predicament, but the little thief was faster than him and already hid himself to eat the content of his robbery. Killer eventually had to give up and return to the table where the others weren't finish laughing.

By the time Nightmare reappeared, they had all done eating and cleaning the table. Killer glared at him.

- You stole my steak, he accused, fists on his hips.

The dragon looked up at him before headbutting his leg.

- Mowww, of course I forgive you ! Killer cooed, bending down, come here !

He lifted him up, bringing him back to the couch for another session of petting and scratching that lasted as long as Nightmare wanted it to, with the only breaks being snack breaks. The little dragon was particularly greedy and would eat just any snacks they would hand him. They had opted for a bag of dried meat, something simple they were mostly sure wouldn't hurt his stomach. They wouldn't want their tiny dragon to get sick.

They stayed with him all afternoon, letting him take naps on their jackets, the poor thing still being quite tired from the lack of negativity, and decided they would sleep I the living room this night, not wanting to leave the dragon alone.

They had brought some covers and extra pillows, Nightmare was on the couch, in a nest made of their jackets.

Cross woke up when a flash suddenly lit up the room, grumbling, he looked up to see what it was. He saw Nightmare, the skeleton, slowly rise from the couch, he seemed tensed, and in the silence of the night he could hear him hyperventilating.

- Night... ? He called in a whisper as to not wake the others up.

Nightmare's gaze shot in his direction, his pupil reduced to a trembling slit, before he backed up in a hurry, tripped on the covers and fell backward. The noise made Horror move.

- What's happening... ? He mumbled.

Nightmare quickly looked at him before rapidly teleporting away. On the second floor, the door of his room slammed shut in an loud echo, waking the two remaining skeletons up.

- W-what was that.. ? Killer asked.

- I.. Cross began, it was Nightmare, he's.. he's awake and he didn't seem very happy to see us... he briefly explained.

The air around them became colder as they all exchanged worried looks, feeling the ambient negativity in the castle thickening.

- I.. think we may have made a mistake... Dust said out loud what they were all starting to think.

- Did he look mad ? Killer asked Cross.

Cross thought for a moment.

- No... more like... scared ?

- Scared ? Why would he be scared ?

Cross shrugged, getting up, he didn't like seeing the look in his boss's eye, it wasn't right, he didn't want him to be scared of them. Why was he even scared ?

- Do you think it has to do with the dragon ? Dust questioned. I mean, he always told us he was dangerous and all, maybe he got scared that he hurt us ?

Killer frowned.

- But we're all fine, If he had hurt us he would have seen it when transforming back.

- Maybe we weren't supposed to see the dragon ?

They looked at Cross, thinking about it, it made sense as Nightmare always seemed reticent to show them his primal form.

- He was hiding... Horror finally said, looking down, a feeling of guilt emerging in his soul, and we still took him...

The others stayed silent for a moment, letting the realization settle in. Cross sat back on the couch.

- He.. He was hiding... Killer began, he was hiding and didn't want to be seen, and we still searched him and took him out of his safe spot... we... we litteraly took advantage of his current weakness to grab him and he tried to fly but we still held him... God he couldn't even talk... ! He couldn't defend himself and we forced him to be here when he was hiding for a reason... !

Killer held his head in his hands after his monolog, so deeply ashamed of himself, the other three weren't doing better. Cross sniffled.

- You're making it sound like we raped him... he whined, feeling heavy with guilt.

For a few minutes only Cross's wheeping disturbed the silence of the castle, until Killer abruptly stood up.

- We need to apologize, he declared, heading to the stairs.

Dust got up to grab his arm, stopping him.

- He probably doesn't want to be bothered right now, we should wait a moment for him to calm down before trying anything.

Killer shrugged, making Dust let go of his arm.

- I'm not gonna come in, I'm not stupid, I'm just gonna knock and apologize.

He had to, he couldn't just wait until morning, he had to let Nightmare know that he was sorry, that they were all sorry, that they didn't think and acted stupid and regretted it. He arrived in front of the door, his hand was shaking when he lifted his arm to knock.

- Boss, you're here.. ?

Nightmare flinched when he heard the knock and the voice, backing down again, his back on the wall opposed to the door, sitting on the ground. He was shaking. What did they want ? What have they done ? Why must they have to see him like that ? To see this weak and pathetic form ? The one thing he had wished to remain a secret, why did they have to open this closet ?

Nightmare was shaking, a hand covering his mouth to try and muffle his heavy breathing. He felt scared, humiliated, confused, naked almost, like all of the walls and layers he had built over time just fell down and left him in a cloud of ashes.

They had seen him, they had seen the dragon, they had seen this little creature so ridiculously small, so contemptible, so useless, they had seen the real him, the him that wasn't fierce, that wasn't big nor intimidating, the him that wasn't threatening. They had seen the truth. Now what would they do ? Would they laugh ? Would they mock him for being this pathetic ? For giving birth to such a big lie when reality was this disappointing ? Would they tell the world about him ? Would they leave him ? Would they be disgusted by such a pathetic leader ? Would they lose all respect they had for him, respect that had been build on a lie ? Would he ever be able to gain their respect again ? What if they never wanted to hear of him again ?

His soul was beating fast in his ribcage, giving him the impression it was about to explode, he heard the drumming sound in his head, making everything else sound muffled. He barely heard Killer on the other side of the door.

- We're sorry Nightmare... we really are... we should have never tried to touch you and we should have just left you alone... we really didn't think and we understand that you're mad at us, you don't have to come out if you're not ready to, but just know that we are sorry... we were jerks, we didn't mean to hurt you...

Nightmare listened, trying to focus on anything else than the tears forming in his eye. Was he honest ? Was Killer honest ? He wanted to believe it, he couldn't feel his emotions, his magic wasn't recovered enough and he was in too big of a panic state to direct it properly anyway.

He wanted to believe him so bad, to believe it was only an accident, that maybe they could still pretend as if nothing happened, but a part of him kept yelling it was a lure. It kept telling him to not take words for proof, that sooner or later they would realize he's truly pathetic and the minute the dragon wouldn't amuse them anymore they would leave. He would lose everything then. He didn't want to, he didn't want to lose them.

- Take all the time you need, we will be waiting for you when you feel ready...

He heard the footsteps go away, and finally let out a sob, choking on air. What was he supposed to do now ? He couldn't go to them anymore, he didn't want to face their gaze just yet, they would surely have questions and he didn't want to answer any of those. He couldn't go to anyone, nobody knew about his secret. He was alone, like before, like he always had been, alone to face his fears.

He should have been more careful, lock himself somewhere else, make sure nobody could reach him. He should have known it, he should have known he couldn't trust his own house, he couldn't even trust his mother's shadow when he was a kid, why would that be any different now ?

He felt stupid, he wanted to hide away and never come out, let everyone forget about him and rot in a corner where no one would see him ever again...

He stayed locked in his room for hours, which turned into a few days, he didn't count how many exactly but Horror kept leaving food platters by his door. He could hear them take turn sitting down and talking to him, telling him they were sorry, that they should have waited for him instead of forcibly taking the dragon, that they were worried about him and to please come out, they wanted to see him. His silence only worried then more, they wouldn't enter by force but if he could at least talk to them, so they would know he's fine... Nightmare felt guilty, he didn't like scaring them that way, he didn't like how ashamed of themselves they all sounded, but he just didn't have the courage to open the door. The mere thought of being the center of attention knowing what happened filled him with shame and embarrassment and he felt his soul burn.

But he had to go out. He could barely stay awake, his magic was so low, the negativity level in the multiverse only kept receding the longer he was inactive, he needed a raid, even a small one, to boost himself enough not to tranform again. And he needed them. He was to weak to go alone. Maybe after this raid he would feel a little better and wouldn't need them, but for now it wasn't the case.

He slowly got up from his bed, feeling his legs shaking under his weight, and opened his door after a long hesitation. Cross was here, standing guard, he jumped when he heard the noise and froze when seeing the skeleton. Judging by his expression, Nightmare must have looked awful. Days without taking care of yourself usually did that.

- Nightmare.. ? Are.. are you feeling okay... ? I-I mean it's a dumb question but-

- We're going on a raid... Nightmare interrupted him, his voice more hoarse than he would have wished.

Cross straightened his stance, an old habit of the soldier receiving orders.

- O-of course ! I'll go fetch the others ! Pl-please don't lock yourself back.. ! He begged before going on his quest.

Nightmare looked at him go, letting out a shaky breath.

The others arrived rapidly, and though none of them knew what to say they all looked at him with a mix of worry and relief to see him out of his room.

- Boss we- Killer began before being interrupted.

- We're going, make it fast..

They all exchanged a glance, but nobody intervened. Nightmare motioned to Cross to open a portal, he couldn't do it himself this time. The soldier did as told, and they all crossed it, Nightmare going in last. He shivered when feeling the cold air of snowdin's forest hit him, embracing himself to try and keep his little body warmth as the others were already in movement. Only Dust stayed near him. He was about to tell him to join the others but the hoodied skeleton talked first.

- It's good to see you out of your room, Night, we were all worried.. we know what we did wasn't right, and we really want to make it up to you... we care about you, 'kay ? Try not to forget that... he said before teleporting away to the others.

Nightmare stiffened when he mentioned what happened, he didn't want to think about it again, but he couldn't avoid it for all eternity. He watched them from afar, not taking part in the activity, and focused on absorbing as much negativity as possible, he had to admit they were doing a particularly good job, though it would take way more than that for him to recover all of his strength.

He let them cause chaos, coming only a little closer to get a better taste of the negativity, ignoring their worried glances each time he moved. Were they really this worried about him ?

He heard a portal open, but Cross was far from him, too far for him to hear anything, and Cross wouldn't make a portal without informing him first, which meant the portal wasn't his, and the sudden sharp pain he felt in his shoulder told him exactly who it was: Dream and his team had arrived, and he just got hit with an arrow.

The arrow got blocked by a blade, Cross was in front of him in a defensive stance, a quick glance around confirmed the others were already fighting Ink and Blue, trying to maintain them as far as possible from him.

He dislodged the arrow before turning, slowly, now wasn't the time, he was still too weak to fight, and if he engaged in a battle now his magic would tire out rapidly and force him to transform back, which was not an option. He took a step back, and saw his brother frown. Oh how pathetic he must have looked for Dream to spot something was wrong. But it didn't stop the guardian from attacking a second time.

It wasn't the first time they would protect him, but this time felt different for some reason. It was absurd, Nightmare knew there were no differences, they acted as they always acted before, but his mind couldn't help but scream at him, telling him they only protected him because they knew how weak he really was. Were they going to tell everyone about that ? Were they going to tell Dream ? Dream always tried to get him to tranform, wanting to see his dragon form, as a confirmation whether it really changed or not, were they going to tell him that he never became that gigantic beast he always described ? Were they going to reveal everything ? No, no they wouldn't, he trusted them not to, he really did... but what if they made a mistake ? What if they said it by accident and Dream heard ? What then ? Would he try even more to tire him ? Would he attack with more fierce ? Would the news spread across the multiverse ? Would he be mocked by everyone again ? What would he do if his lie crumbled, if his only defense fell down ? Where would he hide ? Could he even hide anymore ? He didn't have anywhere to go aside from his castle, but could he hide here ? Or would the castle be attacked if the people knew there wasn't any real threat ? Would he lose his home again ? Would he lose his only safe place ? Would he lose his friends... ?

He almost fell when he felt someone push him forward, a gasp of surprise leaving him as he was abruptly brought back to reality: a portal to the castle was open in front of him, Horror was behind him forcing him to move, Dust was maintaining the stars at distance with sharp bones and blasters, Killer was halfway through the portal, and Cross was next to it looking at him worryingly.

- Boss we're retreating ! Did you not hear me call you ?! He grabbed his arm to pull him in the portal.

The others rapidly followed, and Cross closed the path before anyone else could enter. They were back in the living room.

- Are you okay 'Mare ? Killer asked, coming to him to check his shoulder, you zoned out pretty hard out there... is... do you want to talk about it... ?

They were all looking at him, and he didn't know what to say. He didn't hear them call him, he didn't see Cross opening the portal and only reacted when Horror pushed him. He could have gotten them hurt because his thoughts wouldn't give him a break, and now they were worried about him again. He felt awful, he couldn't protect them in his dragon form and he could have gotten them hurt in his skeletal form. He shouldn't be with them.

- I... I'm fine, I just... I need... some time, alone... he mumbled, taking a few steps back.

He saw Horror begin to reach for him and dodged his hand, going past him to hurry to his room, not wanting to feel their gaze on him any longer. Seriously what would they think of him now ? He had sunken so low...

He didn't want to be a burden, it was really the last thing he ever wanted, especially to them, but he couldn't help but fear they would end up seeing him as one, as someone they had to protect instead of someone they could count on. He had tried to persuade himself that they would never do that, that he trusted them and that they were loyal, but these thoughts kept coming back and they wouldn't let him breath.

And now, because of these polluted thoughts, he was alone in an AU, one week after their raid, to go on a solo negativity run. He could do it himself, he didn't need them, he didn't need their protection, he didn't need them getting hurt for his sake. He would be fine, it would just be a small run, as he always did...

Killer sighed, sitting back up on the couch. Nightmare had been in his room the whole week and barely came out to eat while speaking as little as possible. He was worried about him, they all were, they didn't like that he didn't say anything. They weren't expecting a speech, but if only he could tell them how he felt so they could find a proper way to apologize instead of staying silent. All they wanted was to know what they could do for him, what he wanted, did he want them to never talk about it again ? Did he want them to leave ? Did he want them to swear their loyalty a new time ? They didn't know what he would want and they didn't want to make a mistake again by doing something wrong or inappropriate.

He was about to get up when the sound of a teleportation made him turn his head just in time to see Nightmare crashing on the floor against the armchair, panting heavily, bloody cuts everywhere on his body and arrows in his back.

- Nightmare ?! He exclaimed in chock.

He jumped up, but before he could even rush to his boss's side a blinding purple light erupted from the skeleton's body, making him put his arms in front of his face. When he put them down once the light disappeared, Nightmare wasn't there anymore and in his place laid the tiny dragon, shaking, his fur sticky with blood. The arrows were on the floor next to him, having fallen out in the transformation.

Killer approached slowly, his hands shaking too. Once the dragon spotted him he started growling, his ears flat against his neck.

- It's okay bud, I'm not gonna hurt you... he tried to reassure the dragon as he stopped moving.

The little creature just kept growling, trying to crawl away from him, shaking with all of his members.

- Kills ? I heard you scream, you okay ? Dust asked, arriving in the living room.

He rapidly spotted Nightmare and froze, seeing how the dragon's gaze locked on him.

- What happened ? Why is he hurt ? And why is he a dragon again ?

Killer tried to think, not knowing just what to do, the dragon was scared and hurt and he wanted to help him, but what if they made the same mistake as the first time ? What if they touched the dragon again and Nightmare didn't like that ?

- I- I don't know, I was on the couch and he popped out of nowhere, hurt, and he just transformed... he quickly explained, I think it's a form he takes when he's too weakened ?

The dragon tried to stand up, only to whine in pain and fall on his side again.

- We'll see that later, he needs help. Dust declared, approaching again.

Nightmare growled louder, baring his teeth as a blue light appeared in his mouth.

- It's okay, it's us, we're going to help you.. Dust began but was interrupted by a small fireball.

He jumped to the side to dodge it, noting how the dragon coughed but still prepared another ball. Dust kneeled, looking at Nightmare. Killer didn't move, his whole being was telling him to rush to his side and heal him but that would just make him panic even more and hurt himself. He let Dust try to appease the situation.

- It's okay Night, we just want to help... we'll heal those wounds and then we'll leave you alone... he talked in a soft tone.

The dragon curled further into a ball, breathing out little sparks of blue fire, he looked terrified, his one eyelight fixated on Dust. Did that mean Nightmare didn't trust them anymore ? Did that mean he was scared of them ? Killer's soul clenched at the thought.

- It's okay buddy, it's okay... he kept murmuring as he slowly approached his hand.

The dragon growled louder but didn't make any move to attack, looking back and forth between Dust and his hand until it was just in front of his face. He stared for a while before coming just a little closer, enough to sniff the fingers. Dust didn't move, letting the dragon sniff him and watching him slowly back away again, having stopped growling.

- Kills, go grab the med kit please, and warn the others, he commanded after a few seconds.

Killer nodded, quickly teleporting to the nursery and leaving Dust with Nightmare. The dragon flinched when Killer dissapeared, growling again.

- It's okay, he went to grab stuff to help you, everything's fine. He reassured.

When Killer appeared again he took the plastic case and opened it in front of him to let the dragon see its countenance, while Killer left once more to warn the two remaining skeletons that their boss was hurt and back in his dragon form, and that they should go slowly with him.

Dust took the items he needed one by one, handing each one to the dragon to let him sniff it before putting it down next to him.

- I'm gonna get closer, okay ? He warned.

He slowly approached, staying on the ground as to prevent dominating the dragon with his height. He saw him tense, a fireball starting to form in his mouth before he began coughing again, leaving him whining and shaking.

- Easy bud, easy... it's gonna sting a little, but I promise you'll feel better afterward..

He put disinfectant on a clean cloth and slowly started to clean the drying blood on the dragon's fur, clenching his teeth each time he whined in pain when Dust would clean the wounds.

- I know buddy, I know.. I don't like it either, I'm sorry... he apologized.

He didn't like hurting him, but he had to do it, he had to clean the cuts and bandage them up, he couldn't leave him like that, he just hoped Nightmare would understand...

- I'm almost done...

He finished wrapping the bandages around his paws and abdomen, careful not to tie them too tight, and backed up again. The dragon was shaking, Dust had to take his little sweater off as it was bloody and ripped, and was now curled on the cold stoned floor.

- I brought a cover...

Dust flinched, turning his head around, he didn't notice Cross arriving behind him.

- Is he okay... ? He asked with a shaky voice.

- Yeah... a little shaken up, but he'll be fine... he reassured his friend.

Cross sighed in relief, handing the thick plaid to him. Dust took it and installed it right next to Nightmare, making it so he could crawl inside and be covered.

The dragon stared at them then at the little improvised nest, sniffing the air before slowly, carefully, taking a shaky step towards it. Dust held the entrance opened for him, letting him take his time to crawl in and lay down in a comfortable position before putting the cover down. Only his head poked out. Dust wanted to give him a few pats, to scratch his ear and tell him he had been very brave not moving while he healed him, but he didn't want to risk humiliating Nightmare again, so he didn't.

Horror arrived with a bowl in his hands, Killer came to find him and told him about the situation, so he had decided to prepare something to eat for the little guy, something easy he wouldn't need to chew. He had opted for some plain biscuits broken and mixed with water to make a sort of porridge. He put the bowl down in front of the nest.

- Here, eat a little... he encouraged him, backing down.

Nightmare looked up at him before slowly straightening enough to bend forward and slowly licking the mixture, his little purple tongue looking pale.

They all stayed there, watching over the little dragon as he slept in his small nest. He looked so much smaller like that...

They didn't dare go away, but they didn't dare touch him either, all painfully aware that the last time they did that things only went downhill afterwards and that was why they were at this point now. They always made sure that at least one of them would remain relatively close in case there was a problem, and they all slept in the living room. The dragon kept watching them, not moving from his nest for the first two days, then slowly trying to walk a little, never going too far before coming back to the cover. He would sometimes sit down and look at them with what they could only describe as a pleading look, then go back to lay down when seeing they didn't move to give him what he wanted. What did he want ? They didn't know for sure, they could only assume it was for them to make the pain go away, but they couldn't really do that.

It lasted a whole week, a week of hearing the dragon cry and seeing him so sad at all time, they didn't know what to do. Cross was sitting in the couch when Nightmare got up from his nest and walked over to him, still slow, but already faster than the first days. The dragon came to him and gently headbutted his leg to gain his attention. Cross looked down.

- What's wrong ? Do you need anything ?

He glanced at his bowl, it was still half full, and his bandages were clean. The dragon whined, looking at the soldier.

- I'm sorry, I don't know how to help more...

It pained him to see the small dragon like that and being powerless to make him feel better. Nightmare lifted a paw, tapping it against the couch.

- You want to get on the couch ? He asked.

Nightmare kept looking at him, his paw against the side of the mattress.

- O-Okay, just, please don't move and be careful not to fall...

Cross bent down, very slowly grabbing the dragon by his chest and back paws to put him on the couch next to him.

- Oookay here you go...

Nightmare didn't struggle, waiting to be put down before turning and making his way towards the soldier.

- Where are you going ? Cross confusedly asked.

The dragon didn't stop, carefully climbing Cross's laps to lay down, resting his head on his paws with a little sigh. Cross froze, not daring to move. Was it a good sign ? Nightmare was the one to make the decision, did that mean it was safe ? Could he pet him without it being a bad move ? He wasn't sure, but seeing the dragon so sad was unbearable, and so he gently put a hand on his back, petting him ever so carefully. The little dragon didn't move, closing his eye, a soft purr starting to get heard. Cross was so close to crying, so close to break down completely, he was so worried about Nightmare, so scared to have ruined their relationship, he just wished he understood they meant no harm, and even now they just wanted to help him...

Nightmare didn't move from the couch for the night, rolled up against an arm rest buried under Horror's jacket, he decided he was done sleeping on the ground. They let him do so. He woke up in the morning, before everyone else. He had taken his skeletal form back and kept the jacket around his shoulders.

He looked at them sleeping. They took care of him, they healed him and kept apologizing to the dragon, not forcing any contact, letting him come to them. It... meant a lot.

When they woke up, they quickly spotted that he was back pretty rapidly as their first move in the morning was always check on him. They didn't talk however, letting him begin, not wanting to make him uncomfortable by saying something they shouldn't have when Nightmare made the effort to stay and not lock himself back in his room.

- Go on, I know you have questions... he finally said.

Killer was the first to talk.

- Why didn't you tell us about the dragon... ?

Nightmare looked at him for a moment before looking down, searching for what to say, he sighed; he owed them the truth.

- I was scared of your reaction... my... my dragon form is small, the species is just like that, and... people used that to their advantage... it's not that I didn't trust you, I just... I felt safer with a lie to protect myself...

They listened to him, nodding in understanding.

- But who would hurt such a small creature... ? Cross asked, horrified by the thought of the dragon getting hurt.

Nightmare shivered, feeling some old memories coming back to the surface.

- He's small, easy to kick and hold down... and his fur and antlers are expensive... don't ask me how I know that, please... he answered honestly.

Cross let out a gasp, not wanting to believe such atrocities could have been committed against the small dragon.

- We won't let anyone hurt you like that again, ever, Dust claimed with a resigned tone.

Nightmare looked at him. Horror agreed.

- We'll protect you, promise... no one... will touch you... he confirmed.

Nightmare let the words sink in for a moment, before feeling himself smile a little and nod.

- Thanks...

- We're sorry for what we did, we didn't mean any harm, we would never... Dust apologized again.

- I know... he chuckled, you'll have to apologize to the dragon too, he wasn't happy with the lack of attention this week..

The little commentary helped appease the tension in the air and they all could breath and talk like they all used to talk together, spending the whole morning just calmly discussing on the couches...

Nightmare would need time to get used to letting his dragon form out more often, but his friends seemed to genuinely like him very much, and the dragon liked them just as much as he liked them, so maybe it was for the greater good...

- Does he have a name ?! Killer exclaimed.

- Can I call him Lord Noot ?! He proposed excitedly.

- I... don't think so ? Nightmare replied.

He never wondered if the dragon had a name of his own or if they shared the same. Not that it ever mattered.

- No you may not, Nightmare refused.

Killer whined with a pouty face, making the others laugh.

Yeah, maybe it wouldn't be that bad...

[humaninpogresss77]

I am sorry about this long rant; I know we should be talking about Soobin and Hyeri's interview but I haven't been able to move from this because it really makes me so mad.

Also, I freaking love Thai GLs; they are the only thing I have been watching from the last two years. This is not a complain about them.

Let's make a comparison to try to make sense of what I keep reading in these comments and reviews:

-The Thailand government gave full support and funding to The Loyal Pin, with the only conditions to include cultural aspects of Thailand and not make the royal family bad people.

-The Thailand government also gave full support to Uranus2334, as one of the movies introduce in cannes because they realized that these things bring popularity to the country.

-(the popularity of GLs and BLs are not even the 5% of the effort activist did in Thailand for years to get the equal marriage law) There's was a little push thanks to the popularity that these queer projects are getting. And basically every show made since the law was announce is ending in a wedding because of this.

In contrast:

-The Korean government put in jail the creators of one of the mainstream queer shows made before.

-The Korean government has made an incredible censorship around queer content; taking all this content to the side which has been made for not mainstream Kdramas(listen there's Korean GLs and BLs. We just want Korea to start a mainstream industry like Thailand has done).

With this type of contrast; how some people can expect shows like Friendly Rivalry give the same type of stories and romantic aspects like Thai GLs. Like what type of globalized unified type of world people think that exist and where can I live in it?

Listen I hope everyone gets this. Thai GLs are not the rule; they are the goal.

We got main and famous actress Lee Hyeri kissing another woman for more than 2 seconds and nobody went to jail. This is already huge.

It was a dream? still they kissed. The actresses played the role. We got BTS of the scene where we learned that Hyeri hold Soobin's legs so she didn't slip while they were kissing.

Like Hyeri had to buy from her money a lot accessories Jaeyi used because the show didn't got brand deals.

Because Hyeri has her own show on YouTube we got an interview between them. Nobody besides that one and the photo shoot one is giving them the opportunity to speak(so far).

Oh the show disappoint you,is not what you expected it and you want more things like GLs? Sure go watch those. There's hundreds and more coming. Just ignore these show and not leave bad reviews and comments.

Because these projections tend to bring a lot of problems to the creators in a place where censorship is huge; the audience support is extremely important so people decided to do more. Why risking that much if people are gonna hate what you make?

Either way, the homophobes are gonna give bad reviews and are gonna boycott the show.

And in a situation like this; a reviews counts a lot. Is like leaving a bad review to a franchise restaurant that is extremely big compared to leaving a bad review to a small restaurant. Is gonna affected more the small one.

[trefacot]

„𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐲, 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭”

Alucard x reader drabble

angst ︳comfort ︳female reader

── before reading: This is a request post from anon ,,i was wondering how alucard would be in a relationship with someone who does love him very dearly, but simply can't bring themself to believe he loves them the same..." and here I am. Also the pressure is here, because It is my first request so...hope you'll like it!!

I was listening to this while writing and It's just *chefs kiss* https://youtu.be/R_iPZC4AW38?si=PYWs-SCKo_JO8NEC

── summary: you got asked about when are you going to get married and It stirs something uneasy in your heart.

── warnings (?): reader is insecure and grew up in an orphanage

word count: 933

enjoy.

Like all of the valuable things in this cold, cruel world, love is not easy to achieve. There is some sort of sacred balance in which not everything can be adored. Some things exist just for the sake of filling the empty space. They might only observe the mystery of a true love. Other ones are meant to take your breath away, give meaning to everything they touch or simply lay eyes on.

That's what you've been told.

„Don't expect too much”

„Don't expect what you cannot afford”

„Don't expect what you're not worthy of”

Growing up in a orphanage was not as alienating as people like assume. Of course, when you get asked about it you can't do anything but just put a frail smile on. Nobody favors this. You wouldn't have chosen it, either. While not being the most considerate people you have met, the nuns who supervised your ''home'' were at least fair. If you earned something, you were more than positive you would get it.

„So...when are my absolute favorite dovies are going to get married? I miss weddings so much since my sister's-” Said a fellow bartender from your local bar. At this instance you weren't listening anymore. Marriage? Dear Lord. It's not like you've been with Adrian for this long...or were you?

Time with him appeared so unlike anything else. When you two first met, you were convinced he was your new meaning. Asking him to take you with him after your village was massacred by vampires felt like a new starting point. You would lie, If you said you weren't thrilled that he actually agreed. After all, was there anything peculiar about you? Just a poor young lady with no close relatives and a foolish dream of witnessing the world. But he saved you anyway, liberating you from your grim reality.

You had to gain knowledge quick, be wiser with each day. The absolute last thing you wanted to be seen as was a burden. You remembered that you could earn anyone's respect with hard work. For Alucard it was quite an unfamiliar sight. He had been wandering around the world for decades, but he never saw anyone so dedicated as you until you met. He was already lonely, so it felt like you were meant to be.

Not soon after, you started to see him as something quite distinct from your mentor. His sharp features, yet delicate smile, reminded you of princes from romance books you weren't authorized to read but did it anyway. Every time you touched, mostly accidentally, you felt something soothing inside you. But you couldn't confess. No, you haven't earned yourself a right to love just yet.

So you worked. Every single day, you were giving your whole self for those depressed people from the village you and Alucard settled in. You had a lot of compassion for those in need, especially children. But it was not your main motivator. Seeing a dazzling smile on his adorable face was enough to make you carry mountains. He seemed to had found a solace in his life. It was all you wished for him after learning about his heartbreaking past. Somewhere in searching for his fulfillment, you forgot about your countless lonely nights in the orphanage. Why would you even think about that place? This was not your home anymore. He was your shelter.

In moments like this, when you were caressing Adrian's silky hair while he was laying on your lap, your mind was wandering into one place. How could he seriously care for you? It's cruel to assume he suggested you becoming his life partner while not loving you, but...that is how you felt. To you, there was no reason to stare at you and think of anything else than nothing. That is what you were. Useful, nothing.

„What is bothering you, my dear?” Those golden eyes had been already piercing you through when you looked at your partner's face. Little did you know, he was more than aware of what you thought about yourself. He could hear your quiet sniffles on sleepless nights. He listened to every remark you made to yourself when you thought he was not around.

„It's just...” And for a brief moment you considered telling him everything you were hiding for this whole time. You could have cried about the way you felt like a prisoner of your own expectations. But you couldn't possibly disturb this dreamlike world you've built with him. You didn't want to disrupt his happiness. „I am a bit worn out” that is all you said.

He rose, sitting right beside you. After a minute that felt like an eternity, you felt a cool, yet firm hold on your hand „Don't you know you mean everything to me?” and his words felt like a dagger right through your guts. This could not be possible.

You felt tears slowly gathering in the corners of your eyes. „Please...don't” His face tilted a bit, to have a better view over yours. It was shattering his soul. How could somebody who was so warmhearted, so clever, so gorgeous ever feel this way?

You felt an embrace forming around you. But you felt drained. There wasn't anything particularly left after you transferred everything to him. It was a fate you have chosen for yourself and wouldn't trade for no possessions in this world. His happiness made you meaningful.

Before pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, he said something that made you no longer able to hold back tears.

„Don't cry, you're perfect”.

fin.

[wasyago]

the brainrot won

[skyguyed]

one day i will catch up on all of the star wars there are now. maybe

[ace-malarky]

1. It Is Said

Sometimes you just. wake up with a definite line in your head (it may have been last night actually but whatever) and y'know, since you're going to avoid doing work for as long as possible anyway, you might as well write some weird stuff to send to other librarians?

idk I have been thinking of escalating the little notes I send back to DB and this! this might be it!

Anyway. have you considered there might be monsters in your library?

~

 It is said that there is a monster in the library.

 There are monsters in most libraries, of course. It comes of having so many books in one place, it is said, of all those softly whispered stories and tales and ideas that float amongst the couches were more pictures have described a journey than will ever be remembered.

 Monsters, it is said, are variations on a theme. They are – well, monstrous. They skulk. They creep, they slither, they lurk. They bear fangs, unleash talons, drip toxins from shimmering stingers.

 Monsters, it is said, are to be feared. They are killers, they are nightmares, they are the evil to be slain. To be defeated.

 To be feared.

 It is less said (it is never said) that all monsters protect something. Dragons, with their hoards and their towers; goblins, with their tunnels and their caves. Kraken, with their depths and their shipwrecks.

 They rarely protect something that is not worth protecting. Everything is worth something to somebody.

 So.

 It is said that there is a monster in the library.

 The specifics do not matter, much. It is there now, after all, and there are very few heroes left to fight it.

 (The damage would be irreparable; have you ever tried to leech blood from a book?)

 It hides when the library is open, when there are people around.

 After hours, it stalks the shelves, it lounges amongst the books. It dreams.

 It is not said what monsters dream of. That would make them something other than monster. Something other than itself.

 There is a monster; do not be afraid. It is not here for you. Probably.

 It is here, as all monsters are (it is said), for one thing.

 Only just for one thing. It is a monster, they are defined solely by just one thing.

 It is said that there is a monster in the library.

 It has never said why.

[soaps-mohawk]

Cherry Red, Cimson Blood

Chapter 41: Revenge

Summary: A surprise trip to America has things turning in a direction no one thought they would

Pairing: Poly 141 x reader

Word Count: 6,390

Warnings: Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, a/b/o, alternate universe, dead dove: do not eat, graphic violence, torture, on screen death, stabbing, knives, choking, punching, blood, aftermath of death, emotions, angst, trauma, very small hint of comfort

A/N: Please, please heed the warnings. This chapter deals with some heavy topics and rehashes a lot of Chapter 34. I've put a trigger warning before everything starts and if you don't want to read it then skip from there to the next section. You'll be able to put two and two together from there.

Also if you haven't seen, I went back and changed a pretty major plot point from chapter 34 onward and it will need to be read to really understand this chapter

MASTERLIST | <- Previous | Next ->

“You’re in charge.” John says, passing over the keys to Dr. Keller. “Hold down the fort. Take some time for yourself.” 

“Invite over Ashley.” Kyle winks as he passes. 

“Cute.” Dr. Keller says, rolling her eyes. 

“Call if anything happens.” John continues, ignoring Kyle’s remark. “You know how to get a hold of us.” 

“I do.” Dr. Keller nods. “I’ll make sure the cottage is still standing when you get back.” She glances at the car. “Take care of her.” 

“We will. We’ll make sure she’s still in one piece when we get back.” 

“You better.” Dr. Keller says, giving him a look. “Safe travels.” 

Kyle closes the car door, cutting off the rest of the conversation. You’re squeezed in the back of the car between him and Johnny. It is a tight squeeze between the two of them and their broad shoulders. It’s not the most comfortable position, but the decision to leave one car behind has sealed your fate. 

Simon is in the front passenger seat, looking about as happy to be there as you feel. His arm is leaned against the door, his gaze set out the front windshield. His scent is thick in the air, musky and leathery. It’s a mixed cocktail of scents in the small enclosed space, but Simon’s is the loudest. 

John opens the driver’s side door, climbing into the car. It felt cramped before, but now it feels almost claustrophobic. 

“Just an hour drive and you can stretch your legs.” He says, and you know he’s talking to you. 

“Where are we going?” You ask as he drives down the long driveway. 

“America.” He says, giving you the same answer he gave you before. 

“Why?” You ask, knowing what the answer is going to be. 

“We have some things we need to take care of.” He answers simply. 

“What things?” You pry, already guessing where this conversation is going to go. 

“I already told you.” He replies. Simon glances at him, but says nothing. 

“You told me nothing.” You purse your lips. 

“It’s a surprise.” He says, almost like he’s rehearsed this before. 

“I hate surprises.” You say, leaning back in your seat, your scent souring a bit. “If you bothered to pay attention you’d know that.” The last bit is hardly more than a murmur, but you know he heard you in the enclosed space. 

It falls silent in the car, the five of you sitting there awkwardly after the exchange. It’s been a long time since you’ve been so bombarded by their scents all at once, and it’s been a long time since they’ve been so surrounded by your own scent. It reminds you of that time months ago after Simon returned from his solo assignment when you’d kissed in the car and nearly drove them all insane with an explosion of your scent. 

Only this time, your scent has gone sour with your displeasure and agitation at the lack of information from John.

This time Simon is the first to cave, cracking the car window to let in some air and disperse the heavy scents. 

It’s going to be a long hour. 

Traveling is your worst nightmare. 

Or, at least, traveling like this. 

It’s only the five of you on the plane, some private jet that Kate had procured. It’s a nice plane, but at the same time, being enclosed with your pack for nine hours isn’t exactly ideal. You thought the cottage was bad at times, but at least there you could go outside and escape from them. 

Now you’re really stuck with them. 

Thankfully they’ve mostly left you alone for the duration of the flight, letting you sit in your seat with a book in silence. John and Simon have been in a corner conversing for the better part of the flight, glancing at you every so often. Johnny has slept through most of it, reclined in a seat not far from them. You wondered for a moment if he was faking it to listen in, but when the snores started you knew he really was out. Kyle is in a position not unlike your own, huddled in a seat with a book, minding his own business. 

You really want to know what John and Simon are discussing, what has held their attention for so long. It’s gotten heated a few times, John’s brows pulling into a frown, his lips moving rapidly. Simon’s shoulders keep squaring and relaxing, giving you insight into the rise and fall of emotions during the conversation. You can imagine his face mirroring John’s, his brows pinching in worry or frustration or perhaps even anger. 

Whatever it is, it’s serious enough to last a good part of the flight.

You’re ushered into a car almost as soon as the wheels touch the tarmac and the plane has stopped. You’re stuck between Johnny and Kyle again, but at least the SUV is spacious enough to not have you crammed in like sardines. Your legs are stiff and sore after sitting for the better part of eight hours, but you’re not about to complain. Not with the way John’s hands are gripping the steering wheel. 

If you didn’t know better, you might have thought he was having second thoughts about whatever is happening. 

You still don’t know. 

They still haven’t told you. 

The airstrip the jet landed in looked to be a private one as well, isolated in a grassy area with rolling hills of green and a few sparse trees missing their leaves. You almost fear it might be Texas again, given the warmth of the air for a time so late in the year, but you want to believe they wouldn’t be that cruel to you. At least you hope that’s the case. 

The drive takes longer than the one in England, time seeming to stretch on endlessly as it did in the plane. You’re tired after the flight, but curiosity is keeping you awake and aware. You almost wish you had your book, but it’s stuffed in the back with the small bag you’d been allowed to bring. The others had small bags as well, and you can only imagine what is inside them. 

It makes your insides crawl with nerves. 

The exhaustion becomes too much as the naked trees and rolling hills continue to pass by outside the car. It’s quiet in the car, the tense silence not even enough to keep you awake as your head begins to droop onto Kyle’s shoulder. 

You’re jolted awake as the car comes to a stop. 

The muffled sound of car doors closing outside reaches your ears as you peel your eyes open. 

“Come on.” Kyle says softly, gently shifting you with his shoulder. “Time to get up.” 

You let out a quiet grunt, rubbing your eyes. The world outside is full of grey sky and naked tree limbs from the angle you’re at. John and Simon’s doors slam as they exit the car, the warmth on your other side disappearing as Johnny gets out as well. Gravel crunches outside as Kyle opens his door, easing you so you’re sitting upright. 

The SUV is parked facing another one, and the world behind it opens into more green fields. Kyle slides out of the car, hitting gravel before offering you a hand. You blink the sleep from your eyes, taking the offered hand. 

There’s three other SUVs parked in the gravel, people dressed in plain clothes moving around an old, rickety barn. John is standing halfway between the car and the barn, conversing with Kate. You blink in surprise. You haven’t seen her since she dropped you off with your pack almost a year ago now.

Whatever they’re discussing, it seems to be serious. 

Kyle puts a hand on your back, leading you towards them. 

“Hi honey,” Kate greets you with a small smile, the seriousness melting on her face in almost a performative manner. “How are you holding up?” 

“I don’t know.” You say, wrapping your arms around yourself. “Depends on why I’m here.” 

“You didn’t tell her?” Kate says in surprise, turning back towards John. 

“I knew what she’d say if I told her.” John says. 

You purse your lips again, disliking being talked about as if you’re not standing right there.

Kate looks like she wants to say something, but she doesn’t, instead she takes half a step back. “Better get this over with, then.” 

John turns towards you, wrapping a hand around your wrist. “Come on.” 

You almost dig your heels in and demand he tell you, but you don’t. You have a feeling you’re about to find out regardless as he leads you towards the barn. Simon and Johnny are waiting by the doors, Kyle following close behind you. Nerves are starting to flutter in your stomach, your insides twisting in fear. What the hell is on the other side of those doors and why does everyone seem so serious about it? 

Johnny’s face is hard set, Simon’s eyes blank as John pauses in front of the door for a moment. 

They’re not themselves. 

You’re looking at Task Force 141. 

Simon slides the barn door open, your stomach clenching painfully. It’s dark in the barn, but not dark enough you can’t see. Grey light seeps in through holes in the roof and sides, giving the barn an eerie look, like you’re about to step into a horror movie. 

John’s hand tightens around your wrist, tugging you forward into the musty air inside the barn. You want to dig your heels in now, fight him and scream not to drag you inside. Your hand is shaking, curling in on itself until your nails dig into your palm. 

“Hi darlin’. Didn’t know you’d be joining us too.” 

You feel like you’ve been punched in the gut, the breath leaving your lungs. 

“Phil.” You breathe, nearly choking around his name. 

He’s seated in the middle of the barn, restrained in a chair. He looks far too comfortable and casual sitting there, greeting you like he would an old friend. 

There’s a table beside him filled with all sorts of instruments. Knives, scalpels, an ice pick. 

Your stomach twists as you realize what’s about to happen. 

The other four approach Phil, leaving a gap so you can see him as you linger behind. You have half a mind to turn and run out the now closed door, but something keeps your feet frozen to the ground. 

“You’re wasting your time.” Phil says, addressing the four members of your pack now. “I don’t know where Shepherd is.” 

“That’s not why we’re here.” John says, his voice deeper and rougher than it had been just outside. “You tortured a member of our pack.”

“Our omega.” Johnny says through gritted teeth. 

“Oh I see, a little revenge then.” Phil says, a smirk lifting on his lips as he stares at you. “And you brought a little audience.” 

***Content Warning: Torture ***

You jump as Simon takes a step forward, rearing back before punching Phil across the face. His head snaps to the side from the force of it, a grunt leaving his lips. Simon grips his chin, yanking his head back to the other side so Phil is looking up at him. 

“We’re going to do the same to you that you did to her.” He growls out. 

The words have a shiver tickling down your spine. 

Simon releases Phil before drawing his fist back to throw another punch. Nausea churns in your stomach as something cracks, the sound echoing in the silence. 

“Solid hit, big man.” Phil grins, spitting onto the floor before sitting up straight again. “You’re going to have to hit me harder than that.” His eyes flicker to you as you stand there in shock. “You can ask your omega how hard I hit her.” 

Johnny surges forward, wrapping his hand around Phil’s throat. “Give me a knife. I’ll cut his tongue out.” 

Phil lets out a choked sound, your own throat constricting a bit from the memory of Phil’s hand choking you. Tears fill your eyes as Phil’s face begins to go purple from the lack of oxygen. 

“Easy.” John says, easing Johnny off of Phil. “We’re not done yet.” 

Phil lets out a choking cough, his hands straining where they’re tied to the arms of the chair. “Not bad.” He coughs out, his face still red. “Gonna have to try harder than that.” 

John punches him in the face, sending his head snapping the other direction. Blood trickles from his lip, his tongue darting out to lick the wound. 

“Of course the alpha would spill the first drop of blood.” Phil says, letting out a chuckle, his gaze returning to you. “This is going to take a while, sweetheart. Why don’t you go back outside and wait for your boys to be done, hm?” 

“No.” John says, his hand closing into a fist again. “She’s going to watch every last bit of this.” 

Your stomach churns as he throws another punch at Phil, this one landing with another sickening crack. You don’t really want to watch this, but at the same time, there’s a sick sense of satisfaction filling you as your pack takes revenge on your behalf. Your omega is nearly purring, watching in glee as they drive punch after punch into Phil’s face. 

“You’re going to have to try harder than that.” Phil chokes out around Simon’s hand where it’s wrapped around his throat. 

“We’re just getting started.” Kyle says, grabbing a knife from the table. 

Phil lets out a pained yell as Kyle stabs the knife into his bicep, slowly dragging it down his arm. It’s deeper than Phil had cut you, blood pouring out of the open wound. Your stomach twists, nausea bubbling up into your throat. How easy this all seems for them. 

How easily Phil had tortured you. 

Your fingers trace the thin, pink line down your own arm, your skin burning with a reminder of what happened to you. 

The realization of what’s happening settles in as Kyle drives the knife into Phil’s chest, dragging it downward in another deep cut. You do want to turn around and go outside. You don’t want to watch this anymore. 

The soft call of your name has you coming back to yourself. Your pack has turned to face you now. You hadn’t even realized that you had turned your head away. Tears have trailed down your cheeks, your breath hitching. 

It’s John that’s called your name, his hand outstretched. He’s holding the ice pick. Your shoulder throbs at the sight of it. The memory of one almost exactly like it being stabbed into your scent gland has a whimper leaving your lips. You know what he’s asking, what he’s offering. Phil inflicted the worst pain you’ve ever felt onto you. Now you’re being offered the chance to do the same to him. 

Your omega is screaming, yelling at you to take it, to return what he did back to him. It’s his fault this happened. Weeks of pain and agony that you will always remember. He did that to you. 

You’re moving before you even realize it, your fingers wrapping around the cold metal. Your omega is taking over again, driving that instinctual violence forward again. Simon is standing behind Phil, holding his head to the side. He looks like shit, his face already bruising and covered in blood. The metallic scent of it is strong, your mind flickering back to those soldiers, his soldiers, the ones you killed with that knife. You wonder what happened to it, if it’s still laying out in the forest, the last lingering remnant of the violence that happened there. 

You stare down at Phil, at his exposed neck. He’s jerking against Simon’s hold, as if he knows and understands what’s about to happen, as if he can already sense the pain that’s about to be brought on him. Does he? Does he really understand? 

He’s about to. 

Your hand moves before you can stop it, driving the ice pick as hard as you can into his scent gland. He lets out a yowl of pain as the metal slides under his skin and into that sensitive spot. You remember it, the lightning-like pain rushing through your body, every nerve-ending on fire, every movement agony for days and days and days. 

“Hurts, doesn’t it?” You say, pushing the ice pick as far as you possibly can into his body. “It’s the worst pain I’ve ever felt. Worse than all those years I sat in that institute thinking about my family, the family you helped tear me away from.” You take a step back, leaving the ice pick in his shoulder. “You’ll never forget it, that kind of pain.” 

Simon wraps his hand around the ice pick, pulling it free. Blood seeps out of the hole, pouring down Phil’s chest. He jerks in his restraints, his eyes squeezed shut. 

“You deserve to feel that kind of pain.” You say, taking another step back. 

“Look at you.” Phil laughs, tilting his head up with a wince. His eyes are on you, focused solely on you as you stand there. “Tough little thing. Turning more and more like your father, aren’t you?” His words bite at the back of your brain, your omega screaming at the insult. His eyes leave you, instead roaming over the three members of your pack standing in front of him. “No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t hide her away from this world, could you?” 

He’s not talking to you anymore. 

“You’d always leave a stain on her. Eventually it would come around. She’d get caught up in a life like this, a life of violence and bloodshed. Proud of yourselves?” He lets out a chuckle. “You ruined such sweet innocence.” 

“Shut yer fuckin’ mouth.” Johnny growls as Simon moves back around so he’s standing next to you. 

“Ooh, hit a nerve did I?” Phil laughs, turning his gaze to you. “You know your dad never checked you made it to the institute? As soon as you were out of his sight he could finally stop caring about you.” Phil licks his lips. “I should have just taken you right then. No one would have known the difference. None of this would have happened. You’d still be just a sweet little innocent girl, just like you always should have been.” 

Anger and rage burns through you at his words. Years of repressed fears and emotions surging out all at once. Later you’ll wish you could blame it on your omega, that she took over in this moment, but that’s not the case. It’s you in your true form, in your own rage at Phil for his words, for his actions, for the ways he’s ruined your life even still years later. 

Time slows as your fingers wrap around the knife strapped to Simon’s side. It slides out of its sheath easily, your body moving forward as you grip it tightly in your hand. It won’t be the first time, your brain flashing back to all of those men, men who would have done worse things to you had your omega not acted on instinct. She’s screaming at you now, still, clawing at the poorly constructed cage you’ve forced her back in, calling for violence. 

You’ll give it to her. 

The knife cuts through his skin easily, sliding downward as you stab it into his neck. Blood spurts out, coating your hands in the slippery liquid. Adrenaline courses through your body, your vision going red as you yank the knife from his throat, blood spraying out of his artery from where you’ve severed it. It’s like some gruesome renaissance painting as you’re pulled back, an arm around your waist tugging you backward away from the quickly fading body in the chair, your mouth still open in an enraged scream. 

The knife drops from your hand as you’re tugged backwards, your body falling against a solid one. Your legs feel like jelly as the adrenaline pumps through your system, your blood covered hands shaking as you stare at the lifeless body of a man you once thought of as a family friend. A man who played such an integral part in your life behind the scenes. A man who was almost your alpha, a man who would have been your alpha had it not been for the woman standing outside. 

The man who tortured you and brought you more pain than you’ve ever felt in your entire life. 

He’s dead now. He can’t ever hurt you again. 

Nausea churns in your stomach as you sit there, staring down at your blood-soaked hands. It’s deep red and sticking to your skin, no matter how much Kyle tries to wipe at it with a t-shirt. Your body has gone numb as reality has settled in. 

You just killed a man. 

“Easy.” Kyle says, his hand warm against your chilled skin as he wraps his fingers around your arm. 

You’d jerked away from him, nearly slipping off the edge of the trunk. The trunk of the SUV is open and you’re seated on the edge of it, toes pushing into the gravel below to hold yourself up. Kyle had been trying to wipe the dried blood off of your hands, but no matter how hard he scrubbed, some of it wouldn’t come off. 

“Here.” Footsteps approach in the gravel, the rocks crunching under boots. “Go help Simon.” 

Rougher hands replace Kyle’s, wrapping around your wrists. You jump when the cold water hits your hands, shocking you out of your dazed state. You lift your gaze up to John’s face as he wipes the blood from your hands, the shirt quickly becoming stained with red streaks. 

“This wasn’t our intention. I just want you to know that.” He says, his gaze focused on your hands. “We didn’t bring you here to kill him. I just thought you might want to know what was going to happen to him. Closure. Maybe you could rest easier knowing he wasn’t ever going to see freedom again.” 

“He won’t see anything ever again.” You murmur. 

“It doesn’t make you a bad person. Heat of the moment. He was saying some vile things to you.” John tries to comfort you. 

“But that doesn’t mean I had to kill him.” 

“Maybe not. He wouldn’t have lived much longer regardless.” Your hands are starting to feel raw with how hard John is scrubbing them. It’s almost like he’s trying to wipe the fact you’re a murderer from your hands. “None of us will think any less of you for what you did.” 

You stare down at your hands as John finally relents his scrubbing. The blood is gone, but you’ll always remember the look of it staining your skin. “I’m sorry.” 

John squats down in front of you, his hands closing around yours. They’re so warm compared to your own chilled skin. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” 

“But I do. Phil was right. I’m not innocent anymore. I’m not a good omega. I lost that when I let her take over.” Tears slip down your cheeks, warm against your skin. 

“That doesn’t make you a bad omega.” John says, reaching up to wipe the tears from your cheeks. “You’ve done what you had to do to survive because of our failures. We failed to protect you like we promised and we forced you into situations you shouldn’t have ever been in. We will never be able to apologize enough for what we did.” 

“I’m scared, John.” You whisper. “I don’t want to be like this anymore.” 

His brows furrow. “Be like what?” 

“I still feel like she’s in control.” You say, more tears sliding down your cheeks. “I don’t think I’ve come back to myself at all.” 

Tears still sting your eyes as you sit in the back of the car, watching the flames through the rearview mirror. 

“Unfortunate that the old barn burned down.” Kate says, her voice slightly muffled through the closed car door. 

“Feel sorry for the poor soul stuck inside.” John says. 

“Too bad they’ll never be identified.” 

Their words nearly make you sick again. How easily they talk about it, how easily they can detach themselves. It is their job, you suppose. This is just a normal occurrence to them. It scares you, how easily they confront death and dismiss it. It’s cold and unwelcoming, just like their attitudes had been upon your arrival. You should have known just by that. You should have turned and left when you wanted to. 

Maybe then you’d have less blood on your hands. 

Phil did deserve it, after everything. At least this way you know he won’t try to find you again, won’t try and get revenge of his own against your pack. One less loose string to worry about, John had said. 

There’s just one more that needs to be tied off. 

“Any sign of Shepherd?” John asks. 

“None yet.” Kate answers. “Alex and Farah are investigating a couple of leads. You’ll be the first to know if they find anything.” 

“Good. The sooner we can find him, the better.” 

“He can’t hide forever.” Kate says. “We’ll find him eventually.” She glances towards the car. “You’ll be alright?” 

John is quiet for a moment. “Eventually.” 

“You need anything...” 

“We’ll be sure to let you know.” 

Cold air rushes in with the smell of smoke as Kyle opens the car door. He slides in, quickly closing it. 

“We’re almost ready to go.” He says, shifting so he can put your seatbelt on for you. You’re glad he’s doing it. You’re not sure you could have managed it anyway. “Another long flight back to England.” 

You feel like you’ve spent more time on a plane in the last few hours than you have in your lifetime. You’re not even sure what day it is, or what day it will be when you get back. A week could have passed and you’d never even notice. 

“We’ll stop and get food before we go.” Kyle continues. You know he’s trying to talk to keep you distracted. “Anything you want in particular?” 

Food is the last thing you want right now. 

“Something we can eat on the road I suppose. Don’t want to linger too long anywhere.” Kyle trails off as the doors open, Johnny and Simon climbing in. It’s a tighter squeeze this time thanks to John’s coat that he put on you to keep you warm. You don’t really need it in the car, but his scent is the only thing keeping you sane right now. 

“Ye doin’ alright?” Johnny asks as he puts on his own seatbelt. 

You hum in response, not trusting yourself to answer. You don’t trust yourself to say much of anything right now. 

The smell of smoke hits your nose again as John opens the driver’s side door, climbing into the car. “Let’s get out of here.” He says, putting on his seatbelt before the car rumbles to life. 

You lean back in the seat, staring at the smoldering ashes in the rearview mirror until they disappear around a bend as John drives away from the scene. Warm fingers brush the back of your hand, Kyle’s gaze down on your lap as he slowly curls his fingers around your hand. You stare at his hand for a moment before you look away, curling your fingers around his. 

You don’t remember much of the flight back. You slept through a good part of it, reclined in a seat just like Johnny had been on the flight to America. You barely remember the drive back to the cottage, spending most of it in a sleepy daze with your head propped on Kyle’s shoulder. 

Dr. Keller is there to greet you when you return, some delicious smell wafting from the open door of the cottage. It makes your stomach churn after hours of no food. You haven’t had much of an appetite, the memories of what had happened too fresh to allow you much else but the blissful ignorance of sleep. 

You drag your feet up the steps of the cottage, passing Dr. Keller in a haze as you head straight for the comfortable familiarity of your bed. You can hear quiet voices through the wall as you manage to work your heavy limbs out of your clothes and into something more comfortable. 

You just want to sleep more, sleep forever if it were possible. In sleep you don’t see the blood staining your hands, the spurt of blood from Phil’s neck where you’d stabbed him. You don’t see the light fading from his eyes, his body falling limp as he dies by your hand. In sleep you’re not a murderer, you can go back to when things were easier, when nothing mattered but being a good omega for your pack. Back when your only stress was making a good impression and doing your job like you’re supposed to. 

What a shitty omega you’ve become. You can’t even hold your pack together anymore. 

It’s not like they’re putting in much effort themselves, though. 

Maybe you should let things fall apart. Maybe it would be easier on everyone if you just moved past this, moved on to an unhappy, short life in a care facility while your pack got to live out the rest of their days with nothing but a painful memory of the short stint they got as a full pack. 

Phil was right. You’re not a sweet innocent little girl anymore. That person died as soon as you were forced into this pack. Maybe this was inevitable. By being forced with them you would always become like them. Good omegas learn to adapt to mesh well with their pack, giving up personality and wants in favor of making alphas happy. Maybe this is what they want, maybe this was the way things were always going to end up. You were doomed from the start to become just like them. 

You press your face into your pillow as tears slide down your cheeks, willing yourself to fall into the sweet embrace of sleep once again. 

“John told me what happened.” Dr. Keller says as you sit outside in the cold morning air. “I just want you to know that it doesn’t make me think any less of you.” 

You wish she would. You wish she’d yell and reprimand you for killing someone. You wish any of them would call you a bad person, a wicked soul capable of taking the life of someone else. 

They’re all acting like it’s normal, like it was nothing. 

You hate it. 

“You’re not a bad person.” She says. 

“I killed someone.” You retort. 

“Did you?” 

Her words make you pause. You did. You remember the blood staining your hands, the warm spray of it from Phil’s neck. It was your hand that drove the knife. 

“I want you to walk me through what happened. Step by step.” She says. 

You let out a sigh. It’s not the first time you’ve been over it in the last day. “They were torturing him, but he wouldn’t stop talking. He said that he wished he had just taken me instead of sending me to the institute, and how that way I’d still be an innocent little girl.” Your voice starts to shake. “I got really mad. I barely remember grabbing the knife.” 

“Right there.” Dr. Keller interrupts you. “Walk me through that second by second. What were you feeling beyond just anger?” 

You pause for a moment, thinking it over. What were you feeling? “Blinding rage.” You say. “I was so angry because he helped ruin my life just because he wanted me.” You swallow the lump in your throat. “Just the idea of being his...” Nausea churns in your stomach. “It’s like my brain went numb. It acted on instinct. I didn’t even know Simon had a knife until I was grabbing it.” 

“What was your omega feeling in those moments?” 

You pause to think again. You hadn’t taken into consideration your omega during your ruminations, when you’d told Dr. Keller your side of the events the last few times. “She was...angry too. But, at first, she liked it. She liked Phil being tortured. She wanted me to stab him with the ice pick.” You swallow thickly. “Why did I do that? Why didn’t I say no?” 

“Revenge is a fascinating part of human thought processes.” Dr. Keller says. “In the moment, it fires up those reward centers of the brain. It feels good, feels satisfying. The desire to act on those impulsive needs to dole out justice against someone that wronged you is natural. While it’s not the best idea, it’s just human nature to want to get revenge. In the heat of the moment, logic is the last thing on your mind. Throw in an uncontrolled omega and you may find yourself doing things you don’t want to do, and you don’t know why.” 

“So it was her fault.” You say, wiping your nose. 

“Not exactly. Instincts are complicated things to consider. Instincts don’t care about your feelings or what society considers acceptable. They’re natural, ingrained behaviors in response to certain stimuli and events. A bear chases you, you run. An alpha threatens you, your omega fights back. While yes, what you did may be morally questionable, in the moment, your omega didn’t care about morals or societal expectations. You felt threatened and uncomfortable and your omega acted on your behalf.” 

“It’s because she’s out of control.” You say. 

“Yes. You let her out of that specially crafted cage you learned to keep her in, and now she’s going to fight tooth and nail to stay out. You’re in a very delicate state and it’s not surprising your omega decided to act for you.” 

“She’s so violent.” You say quietly. 

“Omegas and alphas only show themselves for a handful of reasons. Usually those involve danger or extreme emotions. Omegas especially show themselves when violence is needed. We are all fighters at our core, even omegas. You yourself may not be a violent person, but your omega is unsettled. She’s on high alert and any perceived threat could set her off, or any moments of high emotions, such as witnessing what you did.” 

You look down at your hands, imagining them covered with blood again. “I wanted to leave. I should have.” 

“We can’t change what we’ve done in the past. Your omega was likely largely responsible for what happened in those moments. While that doesn’t absolve you of guilt entirely, that also means you weren’t fully in control of yourself when it happened.” She reaches out, putting a hand on yours. “I believe you when you say you didn’t want to do it. I don’t think you’re capable of it in your right mind. You’ve been through a lot over the last few weeks. I thought it was a bad idea to take you, but you know John.” 

“He thinks he knows what's best because it’s what he thinks is best.” You murmur. 

“You can confront him about that.” Dr. Keller says, leaning back in her chair. 

You snort. “That will go well.” 

“It might. Your pack has expressed their willingness to change, to adapt to what you want. You have the power to change your pack. If you don’t like the way they’re doing something, then tell them.” She gives you a pointed look. “They won’t know what to change if you don’t tell them what you want to change.” 

“I’m scared to ask them.” You admit. 

“Why? Why are you scared to ask them?” 

“Good omegas adapt to their pack, they don’t ask. They don’t ask their pack to change just for them.” 

She gives you another look. “Don’t go regressing that far on me.” She shifts in her seat, leaning closer to you. “We’ve talked about this before. You’re a part of this pack too, just as much as they are. You have a right to communicate your needs and your wants just as much as they do. You’re an equal in this pack, and they’ll be the first to agree with that. While their actions of late have been questionable, they do still care about you and want to make you a true equal in this pack.” 

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” You huff. 

“Then let them show you.” She says. “What’s the harm in asking?” 

“They say no.” You say. “I don’t think I could handle it if they said no.” 

“But what if they say yes?” Dr. Keller squeezes your arm. “You’ll never know until you ask. In my professional opinion, I think you hold more power now than you realize. A lot of things happened to you, but a lot of things happened to your pack as well, and within those bonds.”

“Yeah. They’re all fractured now.” You say. 

“They’re in rough shape, but they’re not unfixable. You have to want to fix them. You’re the only one that can fix them.” 

“I don’t like that power.” You say. “Part of me wants to end things.” 

“But, that means there’s a part of you that wants to repair them. As your doctor, I suggest listening to those thoughts more than the ones telling you not to. It won’t be easy, but I think it’s worth your time to try.” 

Tears fill your eyes as you sit there, thinking over her words. You do want to try. You want to try so badly, yet you can’t help that nagging in the back of your mind that everything will go back to the way it was before. 

“What do you need?” Dr. Keller asks softly, brushing some of the hair from your face as you cry. 

What is it you need? A new brain, a reset button, some amnesia? All things you can’t have. You’ll have to choose with what you do have. What do you have? A pack that desperately wants to help you. They’ve told you that themselves. Kyle told you things would get better, but here you are with more blood staining your hands. Kyle wouldn’t lie to you. Not like that. 

You have the power now. 

“Johnny.” You sniffle. “Get me Johnny.” 

NEXT ->

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[uravichii]

"best friends who kiss?"

character/s: bakugo katsuki

summary: recently, your best friend has been kissing you at random times. you have no idea why because he refuses to talk about it. either way, you're not about to let this to ruin your precious friendship.

genre & trope: fluff, best friends to lovers, angry confessions, reader is terrified of love but bakugo wants them so bad 😁, tw kind of ooc bakugo

a/n: i've been watching a lot of pride & prejudice and bridgerton scenes n i'm now obsessed angry confessions 🤩 + this is heavily inspired by that scene in little women :) ALSO i haven't posted in a year 😟 so pls be nice ik my writing's rusty in this :'D

the first time bakugou katsuki kissed you, he pretended he never did.

"what... " you brush your fingers against your bottom lip, your whole face hot. "what the hell was that for?"

"what?" bakugo shrugs, feigning innocence as he takes a swig of his soda.

you try and trace back the events that could have led to the kiss.

you said something along the lines of: "i wish i had a boyfriend. i could definitely pull a cute guy off the street."

then you heard him scoff and say: "no man's sane enough to put up with your insufferable ass." ーor something more insulting than that.

you can't remember what you said in response, and you rack your brain to figure out what prompted him to grab your face and kiss you. it's impossible when all you can think about is the unexpected supple feel of his lips, its faint ghost still lingering on yours.

"that kiss, katsuki! you violated my mouth!"

"dunno what you're talking about. you hit your head or something?"

you blink and second-guess yourself for a second.

"okay, no. you're not gonna gaslight your way out of this." you swat his arm, earning an irked glare from him. "why the hell did you kiss me?"

"you're imagining things, idiot. this stupid game's givin' ya some serious brain damage for sure."

he stands up and swings his bag over his shoulder.

"where are you going? we're not done yetー!"

and he's out of the door.

was he drunk off his soda? maybe he kissed you to mess with your head. he's not that cruel though, you think. maybe he couldn't think of any other way to shut you upー that was something he always struggled with after all.

at least the second time bakugo katsuki kissed you, he was kind enough to warn you.

after enduring the most awkward hour-long study session with him, you decide to put an end to your agony by wrapping it up. you start gathering your things when he stops you with a calloused hand on your wrist.

"what?" you turn to him, your cheeks already heating up from his touch.

there are no thoughts you could read behind those vermillion eyes, and all of a sudden, you don't know your best friend very well anymore.

he walks some tentative steps closer to you until the back of your knees hit the table. he cradles your jaw with such delicacy you didn't even know he was capable of. he slips past your awaiting lips and presses his nose on the side of your head, his warm breath kissing your flushed skin.

"punch me in the face and scram if you don't want this, got it?"

you gulp and forget to answer if not for the gentle squeeze on your wrist. "y/n, you got it?"

"s-sure."

when you two kiss, it's different from last time. it's unhurried, curious, and so intoxicating. the kiss speaks: 'i want you. i want you. i want you' but whose thoughts are these?

he groans into your lips as if to urge you to keep up with the sheer hungriness that has consumed him. you try your best to do so as he deepens the kiss with a palm on the back of your head and practically drinks you in. he doesn't pull away until he hears the tiny whine that escapes you.

"shit, sorry." he mutters, avoiding your stunned gaze.

"t's okay."

"did i hurt you?" the quiet lilt of his voice surprises you.

"no, no. i'm okay, but why'd you kiー"

"bye." he blurts out as he turns to the door and leaves, as if he didn't just invaded your mouth and permanently tainted the years of friendship you two have had. you click your tongue as the heat subsides in your cheeks.

"son of a bitch."

the third time bakugo katsuki kissed you, you let him, and he didn't stop.

you had barely escaped death when you lost your footing while sparring with todoroki. naturally, bakugo yelled the poor guy's ear off and would have murdered him if eraserhead hadn't interfered at the last second.

now, you find yourself heaving in your bed. you don't know whether your hastened pulse is from the adrenaline rush or from the fact that bakugo is all over you right now.

he's planting feather-light kisses all over youー your cheeks, your nose, your forehead, your eyelids, your hands, and your wrist, as panicked murmurs spill out of him in between kisses. 'you scared the hell out of me. you have no idea, fuck. are you okay? are you really okay? tell me you're okay, y/n.'

"i'm okayー" you barely manage to gasp before he dips his lips into yours, desperate and frantic. tremulous hands find solace in your hips as he holds you, gentle enough not to mar your injuries but snug enough to assure his restless heart that you are safe.

your head feels hazy. your limbs ache and lie motionless, and though your lips could barely move to reciprocate his kisses as much as you wanted to, bakugo didn't stop. you tried to ask him about it the next morning, but of course, he ignored you and walked away.

you don't know when he stopped kissing you that night. all you know is that there was a line that was crossed, and your friendship was never going to be the same again.

bakugo katsuki is going to kiss you again. your heart thrums incessantly. whether it's dread or anticipationー you don't know.

you think about the sensation of his lips that's become so familiar to you that you've learned to crave it. it shouldn't be familiar to you, and you sure as hell shouldn't want it. so you do what you think is necessary.

you kick him in the shin.

"motherfー!" sure enough, he's pissed. "what the hell is wrong with you?!"

"what the hell is wrong with you?!"

"i was going toー"

"no! you're not gonna kiss me again and walk away and pretend it never happened. you're messing with my head, katsuki! it's not funny!"

"wasn't trying to be funny!" he barks back.

"okay, so what exactly are you trying to do? what is this? i meanー" you stammer, struggling to find the words. "katsuki, what are we?"

he sighs and shifts his stance, his discomfort apparent. when the silence lingers on for too long, you speak.

"well, whatever it is that you want from me, we're going to stay friends. nothing more, nothing less. that's it." your breath hitches, and you don't know why you feel like crying as you speak. "... so i don't want your stinky mouth anywhere on me again."

silence weighs heavily between you. sometimes you wish you didn't know him too well, then the hurt he veils in his eyes wouldn't be so plain and vivid to you, and you would have walked away by now without an ounce of remorse.

"i like you, y/n." is all he could say when he finally speaks.

you shake your head. "no, you're just confused."

"i'm not confused. i like you."

"katsuki, you've been bitchless all your life, and i'm just the closest thing to a s/o. maybe go take a walk or something."

"i like you." he persists. "i've liked your stupid ass forー"

"stop saying that. you don't."

"i do, and you like me tooー"

"what?!" you laugh incredulously.

'who does this dumbass think he is?' is he right? surely, he's not. then what are you so afraid of in the first place? why have you been counting down the days until he kisses you again? why do you yearn for his touch as if it's something you own? why do you feel so infuriated and so tormented when he leaves the room after kissing you?

you do what is necessary again.

"you're delusional!" you yell at his face, a childish shrill that's awfully familiar to your childhood best friend.

"jesus christ." he inhales sharply in frustration. "you're a fucking pussy, y/n."

you clench your jaw and match his glare. anger surges in your chest and bleeds into your voice.

"i'm not the one who chickens out after kissing their best friend! you can't even acknowledge the fact that you kissed me because you'reー!"

"do you think i want to chicken out? why do you think i run away after kissing you?! if i stayed and confessed all this shit the first time, you would've refused to hear it like the damn coward you are!" he leans close to you, his voice lowering into a ragged snarl that quickens your pulse. "and you're just proving it right now, y/n. you're always going to shut this down and deny your feelings because you're a fucking pussy. you're terrified of relationships, and it's dumbest shit ever. pathetic, really."

you rear back from his words. if anything, you always thought it was katsuki who was afraid of love. now, you can't help but feel small and vulnerable underneath his searing gaze.

"it's not dumb..." you shuffle uncomfortably. "what, i'm supposed to ruin our friendship for a relationship that we're going to break off anyway?"

"we're not going to break it off."

"how do you know that?"

"because i'll be the best goddamn boyfriend in the world!"

"first of all, gross." you scoff. "second of all, it's never gonna work out! you're going to get sick of me in three days max."

"i've known you since we were brats, and i still want you."

"you literally said no man's sane enough to put up with my obnoxious ass."

he smirks. "i said 'insufferable ass'."

"katsuki!" you fight the urge to strangle him and punch that stupid smile off his face.

"wasn't even serious that time." he grimaces and reluctantly continues. "you know damn well you can pull any guy you want, and he'd be the luckiest bastard on earth."

if it were any other day, you'd grin at him and say 'i told you so,' but your lips remain unmoved, and your eyes stay dim. you're afraid you'll never go back to being the same katsuki and y/n again.

"this is pointless, katsuki. i mean, look! we're already fighting." you grouch and tell yourself you don't want this. "i still don't want us to happen so while this friendship is still salvable, let's agree to stay friends, and whatever sappy shit you feel for meー suck it up."

in one swift motion, he closes the distance between you, his face hovering dangerously over yours.

"suck it up?" he breathes, his face taut in frustration. "restraining myself from you is the hardest shit i've ever had to do. it takes everything in me not to kiss your stupid face!"

he shudders, weakly resting his forehead against yours as if this conversation alone has exhausted him. still, he goes on.

"and everytime i failedー everytime i kissed those lips, it was... a moment of weakness, but that's the fucking problemー you're just..." he buries his face into the crook of your neck, a desperate attempt to escape your wide-eyed gaze. "i'm weak for you, y/n. every second. and it drives me fucking insane that you keep running away from me."

he rises to meet your eyes again. the cadence of his voice changes into something weak and desperate, stripped of all the pride and anger he's ever known.

"i love youー fuck. i love you." he lets the words hang in the air, letting the words hear itself spoken because for once, you're not stopping him. "i love you, so please... let me."

after much thought and another agonizing minute of silence, you lean in to kiss bakugo katsuki.

he kisses back almost instantly and revels in the way you wrap your arms around his neck and bear your weight on him completely. he kisses back ardently, his pent-up desires and years of longing etched in the way he seeks your lips, kiss after kiss after kiss.

when you finally pull away, you're met with a devilish smirk, his begging eyes long gone. you wonder to yourself when you'll see those eyes again.

"took ya long enough." he kisses you again. he raises a brow at the way you're caging him in your arms. "jesus, no one's gonna snatch me from you."

"i'm making sure you don't run away again, dumbass."

"i won't." he says earnestly as he props his forehead against yours. "and you won't either. i'll make sure of that."

you nod your head with a giddy smile as he pecks your lips again.

"so..." you say as you exaggerate a pensive look, a cheeky grin spreading across your face. "we're best friends who occasionally kiss?"

he rolls his eyes. "you're impossible."

"recite that speech again, and i'll consider calling you my boyfriend."

"fuck off!"

TAGLIST [1/2] @uxavity @joy-the-reader @kiiraes @escapenightmare @afk-dreaminq @avocamich @theboredvee @wonderwrench @ur-local-simp @p-ol @x0xuglyh0tgrl2005xoxo @cosmonettica @melin-oe @mitzi127 @lilac-o @r2katsu @bakucumsackslut @idunnomynamesince2005 @astralwaifu @taurus852 @creepyproxies @maycat-19-142 @stella-fleurets @veenxys @devilgirlcrybabiey @drawingaddict @kageyama-i-want-tobiors @lexiv-web @angelshimaa @izukus-gf @christiansdior @homosexualjohnwayne @uwiuwi @hirugummies @cupidines @loveisningning (bold couldn't be tagged)

[earthtooz]

x : HAPPY ACCIDENT :*+ﾟ

in which: you let phainon know the consequences of when he doesn't give you any attention.

warnings: 1.2k wc, fluff, phainon is very golden retriever coded in this and of course very down bad, gn!reader, mydei appears, i already said this but like i said, HE IS DOWN BAD.

a/n: the p in phainon stands for puppy or pathetic, or maybe both. btw i haven't played the story quest thumbs up.

You should feel bad about unintentionally conditioning Phainon like an obedient dog- you just didn’t expect him to take it so seriously!

The incident happened less than a week ago, when you walked into the courtyard in search of the Chrysos Heir, and he was exactly where you expected. The resounding, piercing sound of blades colliding was the first tell that the man you wanted to find was indeed there, and the second was when you rounded the corner to find him shirtless and shining with sweat under the gentle sunlight. He had been there for hours already, and as much as you admire his dedication and diligence, you also wonder if he’s been training a little too hard recently, dedicating substantial hours of the day into refining his skills. 

It’s been making you feel lonely. 

The last time you saw him was before noon, and it's been hours since then! You can only entertain yourself by working and reading and managing affairs for so long.

He spots you in his periphery and waves enthusiastically, a gesture you return with a calmer one before you find a marble bench under the shade to sit on. Even if it’s Phainon’s undivided attention you want, watching him spar is still far more exciting than whatever document that sits unread on your desk. 

Half an hour later, Phainon dismisses the soldier he was sparing with, the two of them chattering briefly before the snow-haired approaches you, his muscles flexing with every step he took. 

“Hey, you,” you greet with a smile before standing up, raising your arms over your head to stretch.

“I missed you,” he murmurs before intertwining his arms around your torso, allowing your arms to fall around his neck comfortably. 

“You should bathe,” you say before parting, his skin still hot and sticky with sweat. 

“Do I smell?” 

“Awfully.” 

He frowns at you. “That’s not very nice.” 

“I’m only kidding,” you giggle, “you smell like a bed of fresh roses, just extremely sweaty and… testosterone-filled.” 

“I shall go wash soon, then. Care to join me?” 

“Do you invite everyone to bathe with you, Phainon?” 

“Only the ones I really like, so, please?” He’s pleading at you with those eyes of his, so bright, so innocent, so hard to say no to. 

Well, normally you have a hard time saying no, especially to an offer as tempting as bathing with your lover, but you remember your petty feelings of how he paid more attention to his claymore today, rather than you, so you decide to give him a piece of your mind. It’s what he deserves. 

You hum in exaggerated consideration, even scrunching your nose to make it seem like you were thinking hard, keeping him on his toes. 

“Pretty please?” The hero insists, anticipation shining in those bright orbs. 

“Depends on how well you behave,” you negotiate. “Now, sit down and change your shoes, I’ll get your clothes.” 

He pouts at you, signalling his dissatisfaction. “Alright.” 

You leave to pick up his outerwear from where he discarded it in the courtyard, probably thrown aside when it got too stuffy. Returning to him, the pout is still as present, and he seems to refuse to make eye contact with you, trying to get you to crack.

So, you drop the pile of clothes beside him and counter with a game of your own.

Standing between his legs, both of your hands go to rest on his cheeks, the skin warm and flushed underneath yours. Gently tilting Phainon’s head up, you think you hear his breath hitch as he obeys, looking up at you with those glossy eyes. Gone was the petulance, back was the puppy-dog expression as he stares at you with wonder, and you’re 90% sure that if he had a tail, it’d be vigorously swishing behind him.

He just might be the most simple man you know. Telling him that would only displease him, though, primarily because he doesn’t like it when you talk about other men. 

You giggle softly at the thought as you gently brush stray strands of hair away from his face. 

“I only accompany men who are good to me to the bathhouse,” you muse.

“I’m amazing to you- the best,” he flaunts. “Right?” 

Instead of responding, you slowly lean closer towards him, minimising the gap between your faces. First, you close your eyes when your nose brushes against his, and you keep going until your lips are so painstakingly close that you can feel his graze yours, skin ghosting against skin as you lure him in. Then, just before you can give him what he wants, you draw back, leaving Phainon to chase after a piece of a paradise you won’t grant. 

When he realises that the anticipated kiss wasn’t coming, his eyes slowly blink open. 

“Good boys don’t let their partner feel neglected by training for hours and hours,” you mumble, brushing his hair back before deserting him completely, letting your hands fall back to your sides before cruelly walking away. “You need to learn your lesson, Phainon.”

Still in a daze, he only just registers what you were doing before shooting to his feet. “Hey!” 

Leaving his precious claymore and clothes behind, he chases after your retreating figure.

Effortlessly, the Chrysos Heir catches up and winds his arms around your waist like a tight coil. “Y/n, darling, my light, I’m sorry, you’re right, I have committed a great dishonour today, I will amend it with my life.” 

Humoured, you turn to face him, a melting pot of determination and desperation swirling in those aquamarine eyes. “Well, you do not need to go that far, Deliverer.” 

“So then… a kiss? Or two? Or three? Please?” 

“How about you kiss that claymore instead? Since you spend so much time with it.” 

He whines in your ear, refusing to let you go when you try to slip away by pushing against his very muscular, very sturdy, and very naked chest. 

You spend a good few minutes rejecting his every plea, utterly amused by his growing desperation and how he offered the most preposterous things on Amphoreus for you to forgive him. So you pushed your luck as far as you could before giving Phainon what he wanted, and he breathed you in like air, insisting on wanting more again and again as he pulled you so close you thought you would merge into him.

When you feel his hands roam down your body, tracing your curves and lingering on your hips, you break away before he could get any more carried away.

“Next time you see me while training, you should know what to do, right?” Was all you said that day before moving on, going back to the courtyard to collect his items for him because he was too dazed to do it himself.

Now, you’re left wondering how hard that sentence hit him as Phainon obediently sits down, staring at you with intense eyes that indicated he wanted something from you. He was sparing with Prince Mydei a mere second ago, how did he drop his weapon as soon as you walked in and just… plopped down on the bench like that was the most natural thing in the world? And the other Chrysos Heir just agreed? 

Was there something odd in the air today? Normally these two would spar until there were chips in their weapons.  

Mydei gave you a firm nod in greeting when he walked past and you returned it with a slight bow, still left wondering what on Amphoreus just occurred as you watch his retreating back. 

Until a certain hero clears his throat, causing you to tear your gaze away and at your main source of bewilderment. 

“Did you send Mydei away because… of me?” You ask. 

He nods. 

“Why?” 

“Isn’t that what I’m supposed to do?” 

Your mouth falls slightly agape before the realisation hits. “I… I guess? I was hoping to watch you two spar.” 

He doesn’t respond, doesn’t even blink, only stares you. When you don’t give him what he wants, Phainon impatiently pats his spread thighs and you oblige, stopping before him and letting your hands rest on his face. 

“What am I going to do with you?” You whisper against his lips before sealing the words against his lips.

Well, this was your fault, after all, so you should just do your best to make him happy.

© EARTHTOOZ 2025, do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.

[prettycottagequeer]

ok maybe I'm a little late to this BUT I'm gonna do a to-do list motivation thingy because I've had the worst two weeks since I started college :)

SO these I should start on asap:

50 I make the snack I really want but I haven't had the motivation to make

100 I clean my dorm. another thing I've been meaning to do for a week

150 I do the presentation about mid-victorian fashion I've been putting off (due Monday)

200 I start memorizing the monologue that was due a week ago (now due Tuesday)

these can wait longer:

300 I spend time outside. It's so nice but I'm getting stuck scrolling because I feel like shit. vicious cycle ect

500 I start setting a better weekend routine (aka getting up before noon)

1k I start working out again. I was doing a routine to get more masc and build muscle and I liked it but life hit me like Crowley driving the Bentley and I've missed like 3 weeks

2k I buy my first binder. I've been coping with sports bras for almost a year now and I haven't been able to justify spending $50+ on a binder even though I know I'd love it and use it everyday.

Do I tag people? I don't know but I'm going to. @the-globe-theatre-maggot @weirdly-specific-but-ok @howmanyholesinswisscheese

here's just some context if you want to read, feel free to skip. some of this I've talked about in the maggot server, some I haven't, but I really just need a place for this to go that's out of my head. tw homophobia, transphobia, car crash(??)

How I Have Been Run Over By The Bentley Going 90 In Central London What Feels Like 50 Times In The Last Two Weeks

I'm going to college about 4 hours away from my parents, and it's been really nice. They.. suck, to say the least. transphobic/homophobic ect, super traditional conservative catholic, racist, all of it. so i tried to move somewhere where I wouldn't have to think about them and I could be myself and do what I can to be happy. March 1st was the start of my spring break, which meant going home because the dorms close. I was already not excited, but I was prepared. the problem with being away from home is I forget just how bad they are. My optimism gets the better of me and I think maybe this time they'll be better. so I decided to not hide my septum piercing.

that was a mistake. it starts a whole fight where they say we know you're trans, you're actually a girl and you always will be, we have the bones argument, they think I'm being influenced by demons or something (if only they knew about crowley) because I want to change my name, and they tell me that going on t will completely ruin my body and give me cancer and other things. They're also mad about my dyed hair, septum, and general style, and say I'm setting a terrible example for my (5) younger siblings and make it a point to tell me just how much of a disappointment I am. I think I'm pretty cute and fun but y'know, whatever. very fun time. I lie so much, don't give them any more details about my identity, and say I'm not planning to go on t to save my ass. which is all on instinct which makes me feel worse because if I'm really trans I should be able to stand up for that, right? maybe I'm faking the dysphoria.

the next morning I wake up really sick, and spend the rest of the week sick and feeling like shit because I'm home and back in the same place and situation I was a year ago that I thought I escaped. at one point I pretty much lose my voice but also kind of get gender euphoria from it. it's weird.

On Friday it's time for me to drive back 4 hours to school, and I make it about 3/4 of the way when google maps takes me on a random gravel road and I crash my car, really crash my car, like sideways-in-a-ditch-windows-broken-crawling-up-out-the-door crash it in the middle of nowhere. (I was fully paying attention to the road, it was raining and super slick) I call my parents because I have no one else to call and I sit in a Subway for 3 hours while they drive to get my car. when they get there they're (understandably) really mad, and they tell me that I'm not mature enough to be going to school so far away and I need to get my shit together and stop depending on them. which. is probably true. but made me feel even more stupid about the fact that I crashed my car. I get back to school and I'm still Very Sick with no energy or motivation to do anything. So I've spent the last week trying to get better and honestly to do anything. it hasn't really worked. I'm a lot better health-wise (Not emotionally), still sick but I have a lot of work due, so I really need a push to get started

[yzashaven]

pairing ☆ scaramouche x fem!reader

content warnings ☆ nsfw content ahead. unprotected sex. hate fuck. rough sex. slapping. spanking. degradation + praising. overstimulation. nipple sucking. creampie. hair pulling. marking. riding. mating press. prone bone. "whore, slut, baby"

note .ᐟ HEYYY so like... it's been a while, yes? 3 months since my last post, how is everyone? i made this yesterday randomly at 3am and didn't really feel like posting it on the new blog (that is still in progress) also I AM SO SORRY if this is in any way bad?? i'm so rusty... i haven't written in so long but gosh it felt nice to finish a work and i thought it would be a good idea to put it here just because i felt like it akbsuwhs the plot is kinda all over the place i have no idea—anyway, if i missed anything in the warnings, please let me know! i hope you guys will enjoy reading this ♡

word count ☆ 0.98k

the sight of you riding him was the last thing he expected to enjoy seeing. the way your face has pleasure written all over it, your breasts bouncing with each move your hips make, body trembling from the feeling, and most especially, the way you moaned so lewdly.

he loved it, yet hated you.

he hated your cocky and annoying attitude, always teasing and defying him no matter when or where you were. why do you always think you're better than him? you never will be. well... at least that's what he thinks.

putting you in your place was always the one thing he wanted to do. but as much as he wanted to do so out of anger, the hidden sexual tension between you was no joke. he couldn't avoid it.

he wants to slap you, punch you, hit you in some way. but at the same time he feels like pounding you, pushing your face down into the bed, shutting you up with his fingers in your mouth. no matter how much he thinks you're the absolute worst, he can't deny how attractive you are. and it just fuels his desires even more.

his eyes dart down to watch the way his cock disappears into your pussy, smirking to himself, "such a filthy slut. you take me so well, don't you?" hand reaching behind to grab a fistful of your hair, pulling it back, exposing your neck to him. he doesn't hesitate to lean it and mark you as his.

moving down, he sees your hardened nipples from arousal. his lips wrap around the sensitive area and gently suck on one, tongue flicking on it every now and then. he pulls away and finally lets go of your hair. hands going over to grip your hips now before he spoke up, "getting tired already? gosh, you're weaker than i thought."

you shake your head, about to respond but he doesn't let you. two fingers suddenly filling your mouth, "don't even think of speaking," he whispers and lays you down on your back, "i'm gonna fuck you hard, and you'll take it like a good girl, won't you?"

a red hue spreads across your face. speechless, you nod silently. he smirks and playfully spanks your ass, "atta girl." in one thrust, he fills you up completely. grabbing your legs and bringing them up to your chest. his cock is way deeper inside you in this position and he knows that very well.

capturing your lips in a rough kiss, he began to thrust in and out of you, slow in pace but definitely powerful. gradually getting faster, wilder, with each passing second. your hands come up around your legs to hold them in place, spreading yourself for him.

finally pulling away from the kiss, you try to catch your breath but moans flow out of your lips one after another. to add to it all, he brings his thumb down to rub your clit. it was visible from your body language that you were close to an orgasm. so close.

"you gonna cum around my cock like a good whore, baby?" he chuckles. his other hand comes up to your face, playfully slapping you, "i've always wanted to do that since you're so damn annoying." narrowing his eyes, he glares down at you.

"as if you aren't as well!?" you exclaim back, but it fails—he pinches your clit, drawing out a lewd cry from you. "be quiet and i'll let you cum. come on." you look up at him and make eye contact. he isn't moving anymore, his cock just buried deep inside you. the moment is rather intimate, or so you thought.

"fuck you, scara–"

"you're doing just that and you're still complaining?"

you glare up at him, giving up and letting your head fall back onto the soft pillows, "just fuck me already, fucking hell." you unexpectedly say. he smiles, "gladly."

before you could even register anything else, he was already pounding into you. rough, hard, and fast. giving your clit a sufficient amount of attention as well. all of it was completely overwhelming and all you could do was scream out his name as you came around him. gripping the sheets so tight that your knuckles turned white, your whole body shaking.

"fuck–so good... you feel so fucking good squeezing my cock like that, baby." he groans before finishing inside you. keeping himself in place for a while as he calmed himself down before pulling out gently. he silently watches as your body continues to tremble. scaramouche sighs and gently stimulates your clit, "aww, shh... there there..." the gesture causes you to get overstimulated rather than soothed.

"i'm still hard, just so you know." his voice low as a whisper. "let me just..." flipping you over, he puts you on your hands and knees, entering you from behind and making your body weakly fall flat on the bed. he sighs and just gets on top of you, pushing himself back deep into your wetness.

his bare chest to your back, your body quivering beneath him as he began to thrust into you again. starting at a slow pace that gradually got faster, fucking you properly. leaning down, he whispers right into your ear, "such a perfect cunt you've got, huh?"

you're already so close. the head of his cock brushing over your g-spot every now and then. his body trapping you under him, leaving you with no choice but to take what he gave. drool was already seeping from out of the corner of your mouth from how long you've had your lips apart, occupied in moaning his name over and over again.

as much as he despised you, he could never even think of denying how much he adored the fucked out state you were in. all because of him.

[seungkw1]

ring my bell  — ljh

♡ pairing: neighbor!jihoon x afab!reader ♡ theme: smut [18+ mdni] ♡ wc: 7k ♡ warnings: sub!reader, but also subby!jihoon, size kink, praise kink, auralism/ecouteurism, masturbation (m. & f.), oral (m. & f. receiving), unprotected piv sex (do not do this), cum swallowing, creampie, cockwarming, dacryphilia, size kink, hair pulling, gagging, missionary, 69, nipple play/boob worship, multiple orgasms, sex toys, mild alcohol consumption, did i mention size kink, lil fluff at the end ♡ a/n: i abandoned this fic at least five times lmao but then one night at like 2am the brain rot took over and here we are! tysm to @wonwovy for beta reading, @shinysobi for the title suggestion, and @miniseokminnies for help w the photos <3

When you moved into your new condo, you were pretty sure you hit the jackpot. At first, you were a bit suspicious - how could the rent be so low in this part of town, with such a nice building? But for two months after you moved in, you’ve had no problems. Sure, the shower head is a bit leaky sometimes, and you could use a bit more storage space, but overall - no complaints. As an added bonus the unit next to you was vacant - aka, peace and quiet. Perfection. 

That vacancy didn't last forever, though. Two months in, and you found yourself with a new neighbor. You haven't had a chance to properly introduce yourself to him yet, but from the brief glimpses of him you've gotten he seems nice. You suspect he's around your age, a bit quiet, definitely keeps to himself but has been very polite in passing. And while he's not exactly your type, you do admit he is pretty cute. So, nothing wrong with him. 

You did, however, quickly discover two major problems. One, it turns out the walls are paper fucking thin. And two - to make matters worse - his bedroom is apparently right on the other side of yours, sharing a wall. And you can hear everything. 

By the sounds of it, the guy is single. You never hear any other voices, just his - soft moans emanating through the sad excuse for a wall, gradually getting louder, culminating in a symphony of unholy noises. You've never heard a man be so… vocal before. 

At first, you just try to ignore it. Obviously, he's doing nothing wrong - this is simply a consequence of shared living spaces. So you do your best to mind your business. 

Easier said than done. 

A week passes. You still haven't had a chance to actually say hi to your new neighbor, but you already feel like you've become intimately acquainted with him. It feels a bit… wrong. This is very clearly a one-sided situation. You don't even know the guy’s name for fuck’s sake. Yet, each time, a sharp aching sensation forms a pit in your stomach. You find yourself fantasizing about him -  wishing you could be on the other side of the wall, wishing you were the one responsible for the sounds being produced. 

You've gone and fallen for a complete stranger - or at least, the idea of him. Fucking great. 

You just need to actually meet him, you tell yourself. He could be a complete asshole. Or maybe just not your type at all. Once you say hi, you'll get over this silly little fantasy in no time. 

I’ll make sure to run into him tomorrow, you determine. You go to bed, content with your plan. 

Not five minutes after you crawl under the covers, you start to hear faint groans. 

You reach for your airpods, but they're not on your nightstand. You must have left them in the other room. 

It’s fine, you decide. It’ll be over soon enough. 

But tonight, apparently, he is taking his sweet time. 

You stuff your head under the pillows, trying to drown out the sensual sounds, but the moaning persists. Even muffled it’s loud - and it only gets worse as the minutes pass. 

Just when you think he’s about to finish, the sounds cease. Thank god, you think as you roll over, ready to finally get some sleep. 

But a minute later he starts up again. Slowly at first, once again taking his time, increasing his speed at an excruciatingly slow pace. Eventually his breaths grow shorter, his groaning louder. Then, he stops. 

As if he set out to torment you tonight, he begins once more.  

You lay there, eyes closed, unmoving, breathing deeply, trying to ignore the aching between your legs. But it's impossible. 

The third time around, he's clearly very on edge. His moans turn loud, whiny, pathetic. It's probably the hottest thing you've ever heard. 

Don’t do it don't do it don't do it…

As if your arm has gained a mind of its own, your hand slides beneath the fabric of your underwear. You gasp as your fingers slip between your folds - you're fucking wet. 

Your already-throbbing bud pulsates between your fingers. Slowly, you begin to rub your clit. The sensation is immediately overwhelming; the uninhibited cries of pleasure emanating from the other side of the wall are enough to send you over the edge. Just when you think you can't take another moment of this, he cums. And so do you. 

Your free hand clasps over your mouth just in time. You try as hard as you possibly can to stay silent - but you want to scream. You writhe against the sheets to the sound of his release, riding out your orgasm on your fingertips. Muffled cries escape despite your efforts - but are lost amidst the man’s sea of moans. You cum long and hard, savoring every last moment of your high. 

As you start to come down, you sink into your mattress, body spent, mind drifting off. Your neighbor seems to have exhausted himself too - the only sounds carrying through the wall now being that of deep breaths. 

So much for running into him tomorrow. 

You flop over onto your side, shoving the thought away - but you know even if you try, you can't avoid him forever. 

You just pray to god he didn't hear you. 

Of course, after a week without any encounters, you manage to run into him the very next day. 

Upon returning from the grocery store, you head to your building’s elevator. The doors are closing as you approach, so you figure you'll just take the next one - but the occupant holds the door for you. 

“Thank you,” you say cheerfully, but as you step inside your stomach drops. You are face to face with your new neighbor.

“You’re welcome,” he replies, making direct eye contact with you. You want to disappear into the walls, but you maintain your composure. The button for your floor is already lit up, so he presses the close door button. 

“I believe I just moved into the unit next to yours,” he says as you set your heavy bags on the floor. “I've seen you around but haven't had a chance to introduce myself. I’m Jihoon.”

He extends his hand out to you. You instantly regret setting your bags down. 

You smile calmly, hoping he doesn't notice how flustered you are. But as you slide your hand into his, your heart rate rises. It doesn't help that he has really nice hands - large, warm, with fingers long and graceful, and a nice strong grip against your own hand. Your mind flashes back to the events of last night, picturing what those hands were doing…

Stop it. 

“I’m y/n,” you reply with a smile, trying to be as normal as possible. “Nice to meet you.”

You withdraw your hand from his grasp as he lets go - nonchalantly, but with haste. Any longer and your palms would have probably started sweating. 

“So, how are you liking it here so far?” you ask casually. 

“So far so good,” he replies. “I'm honestly surprised that I was able to find anything in this part of town for such a good deal. Nice and quiet here too.”

Quiet. 

You fear your suspicions are correct: he has no idea he's been putting on a nightly show for you. 

The elevator gives a soft ding as it comes to a stop. You reach down to grab your bags as the door opens. 

“Can I help you with that?” 

“Oh, uh… sure.”

He picks up the heavy bags with ease. You could tell that he’s a muscular guy, but up close he looks straight up beefy. It doesn't help that the tight shirt he's wearing hugs all his muscles perfectly, his biceps nearly bursting out of his sleeves. You force yourself to look away before you start fucking drooling. 

He delivers the bags to your front door. He returns them to you with care, making sure you have a firm grip on the handles before letting go. His hand lingers upon yours momentarily - the lightest brush of his fingertips against yours enough for your insides to do a somersault. 

“Thanks again,” you tell him, making the mistake of direct eye contact again. 

“Of course,” Jihoon replies warmly. “See you around.”

You flash him a smile, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. “Bye!!” you blurt abruptly as you unlock your front door, hurrying inside. You want to turn around, get one more good look at him - but you shut the door behind you. 

Your head spins as you put your groceries away. You're so wrapped up in your imagination that you nearly put the milk in the cabinet. But you can't stop daydreaming about what those muscles look like underneath his shirt. 

You finish up and head into your bedroom. A nice hot shower should clear your mind. Not two seconds after taking off your shirt, you freeze. The familiar sounds from next door have begun yet again. 

You stand there, half horrified, half horny. Surely it's nothing more than coincidence that your neighbor got home and started jacking off minutes after having a conversation with you. He was probably gonna do that anyway, you try to convince yourself. You're just having main character syndrome right now, this has nothing to do with you. 

But your gut is telling you otherwise. 

Mindlessly your fingers drift to your bra clasp, removing the garment. Taking your breast in one hand you stroke your thumb over your nipple, already hard from sudden exposure to the cool air of your room. You let yourself stand there for a minute, listening to Jihoon’s soft moans, imagining you could see him through the wall, slowly stroking his cock in his hands. 

You feel guilty, ashamed, but the aching in your cunt overpowers any sense of remorse. Your hand makes its way into your pants, your fingers gliding through your folds, slipping easily into your soaked pussy. You wince silently, stifling the moans desperately trying to escape you. Slowly, you begin to fuck yourself. You can't help but think about how it would feel if it were Jihoon’s fingers inside you instead. 

You stand there for a couple minutes, your clit throbbing against the motion of your palm - threatening to make you scream and cum. 

You can't let him hear you, you keep telling yourself. But part of you almost wants him to hear you. You picture him getting so turned on hearing your cries of pleasure that he cums instantly, all over himself, making a huge mess that you would love nothing more than to help clean up. 

You feel your climax rapidly approaching. You cease moving your fingers, but let them remain resting inside you. You try to calm yourself down, taking deep breaths to slow your pounding heart, but just as your head starts to clear you hear a sudden swell of orgasmic sounds from through the wall. As if by reflex your hand moves again. Your body tremors at the pressure against your overstimulated clit - you cum in silence, forcing your cries back inside you as . You ride out your high, and so does Jihoon, his moans slowly softening as he comes back down. 

Heart pounding, you slowly remove your fingers from your cunt. Your hand is soaked; you find yourself wishing it was Jihoon's face instead, glistening with your juices after eating you out, making you cum an unreasonable amount of times. 

You sigh. You know this should all feel wrong. But why does it feel so good then?

A strange combination of feelings overtake your body: tingling bliss from your orgasm, guilt from the reason for your orgasm, an overpowering yearning for the touch of essentially an entire stranger. 

You strip the remainder of your clothes off and proceed to take a very long, very hot shower. 

You wake up the next morning stupidly horny.

It didn’t help that you had a dream about Jihoon. In it, you were standing in his bedroom, watching him masturbate to the sight of you. His cries echoing through your subconscious, the pathetic look on this face as he came all over himself - it’s not surprising you woke up to a puddle between your legs.

You pause, listening to see if you can hear your neighbor next door, but you hear nothing. You reach into your nightstand, pulling out your favorite vibrator. The purple device rumbles in your hand as you turn it on. For a vibrator, it’s pretty quiet, but with your stupid thin walls you know it would be perfectly audible from the other side. You think Jihoon isn’t around - surely you would hear him if he were - but even if he is, you truly don’t even care anymore. You position the toy lightly upon your clit - even through the fabric of your underwear, its powerful vibrations instantly feel amazing. A soft groan escapes your lips before you can stop it. Your hips begin to move lightly at the stimulation - the pressure of the vibrator’s end causing your wetness to stick to your panties. You attempt to restrain your moaning, but before long you cease resisting. It feels too good. Your orgasm quickly builds in your gut, making you whimper as you squirm against your pillow, its intensity growing and growing until - you cum. The fire of your release burns through your body, your cries filling the air without abandon. Deep breaths fill your lungs as you come down, soft gasps emanating from your lips as you turn the toy off and toss it aside. 

A series of thunks echo from through the wall, followed by a hushed “shit”.

It sounds like somebody dropping a phone or something, but whatever it is - turns out your neighbor was home after all. Whoops.

In your post-orgasm bliss you begin to drift back to sleep. You don’t know what you’re going to do now next time you run into Jihoon, but that’s a problem for later.

You end up sleeping in far too late. By the time you wake up, you feel groggy and sluggish, so you figure going to the gym will help you feel a little better. You don a soft pink pair of leggings and a light gray sports bra, filling your water bottle and grabbing your airpods on your way out the door. You wait in the hallway for the elevator. It reaches your floor with a ding, its doors sliding open to reveal who other than your next door neighbor. 

Of fucking course.

He appears to be returning from the gym, his tight white t-shirt clinging to his body in a way that practically puts all his muscles on display. His dark hair is damp and sweaty, messy, stray strands of it sticking to his forehead. He looks up to see you standing there, a panicked look instantly filling his eyes. His skin is already flush from exercising, but his ears turn practically crimson at the sight of you. 

“Hi,” you say with a friendly smile.

He freezes, staring at you like a deer caught in the headlights. He quickly tries to shake it off.

“Oh, uh, hey,” he mumbles in an attempted nonchalant tone, but already his cheeks are becoming more flustered. You see his eyes flicker up and down your body - your outfit isn’t terribly revealing, but it’s certainly on the sexier side of athleticwear. He stands there, awkwardly frozen - so long that the elevator door begins to shut again. He grabs hold of it, triggering the motion sensor so it reopens. He starts to shuffle past you, but you decide you’re feeling bold enough to try and engage him in a conversation.

“Just coming back from the gym?” you ask casually.

He stops in the hallway, standing right before you.

“Oh, yeah.”

“Do you also go to the one over on Clark Street?” you question. You won’t hold him up too long - he looks like he wants to perish - but you figure you’ll torment him for another minute or so.  “That’s where I’m headed now.”

“Yeah, I do,” he answers, subtly shifting his gym bag in front of his body. 

“Cool! Maybe we’ll see each other there sometime,” you tell him in a chipper tone. 

“Maybe, yeah. That’d be cool,” he replies, smiling nervously.

You enter the elevator and press the ground floor button.

“Well, see ya around!” you tell him with a wave.

“You too,” he responds, not taking his eyes off you until the elevator door shuts closed.

Three days pass - three days of pure silence from the other side of the wall. 

Now that Jihoon has discovered the truth, he's clearly mortified. You catch a few glimpses of him around the building, but the man practically vanishes at the sight of you. You feel a little bit bad, but you know the ruse could not have lasted forever anyway. 

Unless he somehow knows exactly when you're not home and has been jacking off exclusively then, you haven't heard him pull his dick out at all. And judging by the couple times you've seen him, the man has been incredibly on edge. 

You return home a bit late in the evening after hanging out with some friends. You’ve had a fair bit of wine, so you're feeling a little tipsy, but you're in a pleasantly good mood. You're also decently horny; your mind drifts to your neighbor, conjuring up the image of him returning from the gym, sweaty, muscular, his t-shirt damp and tightly fitted against his sculpted body. 

Not two minutes pass after you step inside before you hear the SLAM of a door from the hallway. Footsteps approach your unit, followed by frantic knocking on your front door. 

You scurry over to the entrance, reaching out to unlock the door, but the pit in your stomach makes you pause. What if he’s mad at you? you start to worry. 

Well, only one way to find out. 

With the click the deadbolt turns. You swing the door open to reveal Jihoon, in a plain white t-shirt and grey fucking sweatpants. 

He stares at you, standing frozen in your doorway. You can see the gears turning in his head, trying to calculate if this is all a mistake. 

After just enough moments of silence for it to be awkward, he clears his throat. 

“Hi, um… May I come in?”

He looks incredibly tense, but the way he's staring at you with such intensity makes your pussy ache. 

“Sure.”

You step aside, gesturing for him to come in. 

He enters. He takes a look around as you shut the door behind him. 

“It's really nice in here,” he comments, attempting to make small talk. 

“Oh, thank you,” you say with a friendly smile. He looks even more nervous now that he's in your apartment. He pauses, nonchalantly observing some of the artwork on your wall, seemingly trying (and failing) to come up with a good segue into whatever he came over here to say. 

“So, um…” he starts, rubbing his hands together anxiously. 

“I just wanted to… uh… well, I figured I should probably let you know…” 

You inch even closer to him as he stumbles over his words; his shoulders tense slightly. He runs one hand through his hair, avoiding your gaze. 

“I guess I just wanted to apologize,” he finally is able to articulate. “I just recently realized that the walls in this building are pretty thin and uh… well I guess I don’t know if I've been loud at all…” 

Blushed redness creeps up his neck as his terrible lying resonates through the room. 

Maybe it's the way he's standing there, doing nothing but stumbling over his words yet looking incredibly sexy, or maybe it's the wine - but you're feeling bold today. 

“Yeah, you have been.”

The pale color of his cheeks suddenly goes even paler, turning his entire face sheet-white as he stands there, horrified. Then, the redness returns with a vengeance. He looks like a very hot, very nervous tomato. 

“I’m so sorry,” he stammers, “I really had no idea-”

“Why are you apologizing?”

He stares at you, confused. 

“Um…”

He waits for you to clarify, but you don't. Seeing him this flustered up close and personal has your panties soaked already, and you want to revel in it. 

He lets out a deep sigh. 

“I just… I know I can be loud sometimes, but from now on I’ll be more conscientious of my… volume. And I just don't want you to think I’m perverted or anything…”

He shakes his head, realizing he's just digging himself a deeper hole at this point. 

“Anyway, I’m really sorry to bother you, I should get going-”

He tries to slip past you, but you throw your arm out in front of him, slamming your palm into the wall of the narrow hallway as you block him from exiting. He freezes, involuntarily holding his breath as panic spreads across his face. 

“What if I like it?”

Your arm brushes against his torso, his chest heaving into you with his quickening breaths. 

“What?” he asks, barely more than a whisper, clearly taken aback by your question. 

“What if I like hearing you?”

His eyes widen. You step even closer into his personal space, your face now mere inches from his. 

“What if I want to hear you making those noises on this side of the wall, in my bed?”

You grasp onto his t-shirt, yanking his body into yours. He lets out a gasp as your tits press into his chest - his mouth is now so close to yours that you feel the exhale against your lips. 

“Would you like that?”

He gazes at you, his eyes darkening with desire. Then - he kisses you. 

It's not a delicate kiss, nor is it sweet. He kisses you as if he intends to devour you, hungrily tugging at your lips as he grasps at your waist fervorously, aching to touch every inch of you. 

His large hands slip underneath your shirt, gripping your sides tight as he caresses your warm skin. Your heart races in your chest, the sounds of rushing blood flooding your ears as you kiss Jihoon, savoring the sweet taste of his lips, basking in the radiant heat of his body against yours. 

“Oh wow,” he mutters into your mouth as his lips depart yours briefly. 

You grasp onto his tshirt, balling the fabric in your fists, pulling him with you as you stumble toward your bedroom together, still kissing him. 

As you step through the doorway, you tug on his shirt, prompting him to remove it. He pauses, contemplating the taste of wine lingering on your lips.

“Are you… drunk?” he asks delicately. “I just want to make sure…”

“A little,” you reply, leaning into him, so close that the vibrations of your soft-spoken words resonate against his lips.

“But I know what I want.”

Jihoon squeezes the flesh of your hips, his grip unrelentless, as if someone was going to take you away from him. A thick bulge beneath his sweatpants presses against you as he holds you tightly against him.

“And what do you want?” he asks in a low voice, staring at you hungrily. “Tell me.”

“First,” you start, pulling at his shirt again. “Get rid of this.”

He yanks his tshirt over his head, tossing it onto the floor. Standing before you now, shirtless, you get a true look at his brawny figure: huge biceps framing his body, thick pectorals protruding from his chest, chiseled abs sculpting his stomach. The man has muscles you didn’t even know existed. You delicately drag your fingertips up and down his torso, admiring him; his cock twitches against you at your touch.

“God you’re so fucking hot,” you mumble as you gaze into his eyes - giving him the most pathetic, needy, seductive look you can muster. 

Redness spreads across his neck and chest. He’s clearly easily flustered (at least, for you), and you plan to take full advantage of this. 

You slip one finger beneath the waistband of his sweatpants, tugging lightly. 

“Now, get rid of these.”

Obediently, he slides his pants down, having to stretch the elastic further to get it over his bulge. Kicking the sweats off, you get a clearer look at what he’s packing. Even through the dark fabric of his underwear, the outline of his hard cock is undeniable - not only long, but thick. Your pussy clenches at the mere sight of his size. 

You can't wait any longer. You run your hand over his clothed cock, feeling its weight in your palm. Jihoon groans, letting out the sweet sound you've until now only heard muffled through the wall. Hearing him now, here, in your bedroom - it's music to your ears. 

Reaching into his underwear, you grip your hand around his girth - he nearly whimpers at the sensation. You give him a few strokes before pulling his cock fully out, causing you to let out an audible gasp. 

Fucking shit.

Jihoon gives you an embarrassed smile, making you realize you said that out loud and not just in your head. But if anything your reaction wasn't even dramatic enough, because his cock is fucking huge. You take him in your fist, slowly pumping up and down; his eyes roll back into his head, letting out a deep sigh as you stroke him. You press your lips into his neck, planting delicate kisses into the soft skin.

“Oh god,” he groans under his breath. 

With his dick twitching in your hand, growing stiff and somehow even longer, you drop to your knees, positioning your face directly beneath the behemoth of a cock. You gaze up at him as you drag your tongue from his base to his tip; he strokes your cheek lightly with the back of his fingers, gazing down at you with a look of equal parts admiration and lust. You swirl your tongue around the head, tasting the precum that has dribbled out. Taking just a tiny bit of his tip between puckered lips, you begin suckling on it, lapping up his juices and teasing him with the bare-minimum stimulation. His low hum swells into a moan as you slowly slide his cock into your mouth, taking as much of his length as possible before you start to choke (Not yet, you think to yourself. Save that for later.)

“Fuck, you look so good right now,” he groans, cupping your cheek in his large hand as you stare up at him with big doe eyes. “So beautiful with my cock in that pretty little mouth of yours.” 

Sharp throbbing pulses between your legs at the slightest of praise. You slide your mouth up and down his length, gradually increasing your pace. His tip hitting the back of your mouth only makes you want more, makes you want to swallow him whole, gag on the entire shaft as his massive size fills your throat. Finally, you can resist no longer - you swallow the rest of him, your lips greeting his base as his full length slides down your throat. Tears instantly begin welling in your eyes, streaming down your cheeks as you bob your head up and down, choking on Jihoon’s cock.

He places one hand upon your hair, grasping it in his fist as you give him the absolute sloppiest head he’s ever received. Grotesque gagging sounds emanate from your throat, but are nearly drowned out by the lewd string of moans coming from Jihoon. He wants nothing more than to watch you choke on his cock, see your tears flowing freely as you stare up at him, eyes longingly transfixed upon each other - but he can’t help but shut his eyes, head falling back at the overwhelming pleasure you’re making him feel. It starts to take over his whole body - his hips reflexively begin thrusting, sinking his length deep into your throat. Before long he pulls you by the hair, wresting you off of him; strings of saliva stretch from his drenched cock to your coated lips, bubbles of spit running down your chin. 

“Sorry, that was going to make me cum way too fast,” he tells you with a sheepish smile. “You’re just so- ohhh…” His sentence is cut off by you placing one of his balls in your mouth, lightly sucking on it before taking the other as well. 

“Fuck that’s hot,” he grumbles, stroking your hair gently. You shift on your knees, trying to sit more comfortably upon the floor; Jihoon notices.

“Come here,” he instructs as he pulls you up off the floor. “I want you to be comfortable.” 

He brings you over to the bed, laying down atop it. You go to resume your place between his legs, but he grabs your arms to stop you.

“You should take these off,” he insists, tugging at your clothes with desperation in his eyes. “Please. I wanna see you.”

You pull your shirt over your head, discarding it to the floor. Slowly you unfasten your pants, sliding them down your hips - a bit timidly, for as horny as you are right now you’re suddenly afflicted with a wave of shyness. But the way Jihoon is looking at you - eyes glazed over with pure lust, licking his lips like he wants to devour you - is driving you utterly crazy. You swiftly remove your bra and panties, standing nude before him as he marvels at the sight of you.

“You’re perfect,” he says, his voice deep and gravelly. Your pussy clenches, attempting to alleviate the powerful aching in your core. Jihoon takes your hand, drawing you into the side of the bed.

“Sit on my face. Please.”

It’s not an order; the way he is looking up at you, squeezing your hand - he’s begging.

“Only if I can suck your cock at the same time,” you say with a cheeky grin. His eyes widen. 

“Would you like that?” you ask coyly, batting your eyelashes at him as you trace circles on his stomach with one fingernail. 

“Y-yeah,” he whimpers, his voice cracking slightly.  

“Good.”

You crawl onto the bed, swinging your legs over Jihoon’s head as you face his painfully erect cock. You situate yourself steadily, lowering your pussy toward his face, until you feel his soft, plush lips against you. Instantly he lets out a loud moan, the vibrations against your soaked core triggering a sharp jolt in your stomach. He wraps his arms around your inner thighs, holding you tight against him, his moans still resonating through the room even with his face buried in your cunt. 

He begins to work his tongue deep into your folds, licking every last bit, lapping up as much of your juices as he possibly can - the rest certainly dripping down his chin. You lean over, reaching for his thick cock one more; you grip the base tight in your fist, stroking the hilt while taking the rest in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down his length. The pathetic noises coming from under your cunt grow even louder - Jihoon begins to squirm underneath you, bucking his hips as he continues eating you out as if the world were ending tomorrow. He latches onto your clit, suckling on the stimulated bud; you cry out, but the sound is garbled amidst your cacophony of unbridled gagging noises. Your eyes flood with tears as your orgasm rapidly approaches - you grind your hips on his face, stimulating your pussy further and further, the burning in your gut swelling and swelling, your legs trembling even in Jihoon’s tight embrace. Your whole body convulses atop of his as you reach your climax. Desperate for air, you pull your head up, your mouth now empty but quickly refilled with cries of pleasure as you cum all over Jihoon’s face. 

“Oh my godddd,” you wail, your mind going blank as every nerve in your body lights up like fireworks. 

“Oh my god, oh fuckkkk, Jihoon…”

The rumbling vibrations of his groaning carry you through an overpowering orgasm; you ride out your high as he sucks on your clit mercilessly while his nose presses into your cunt. You’re seeing stars as you begin to come down, unable to think any coherent thoughts - instead basking in how fucking incredible Jihoon just made you feel. 

You lift your throbbing pussy off his face, giving your poor overstimulated clit a moment to recover. 

“Gonna cum, ‘m so close,” Jihoon moans. You quickly pop his dick back into your mouth, sliding his length in and out, hollowing your cheeks as you suck his cock like your life depends on it. 

“Ahh, ahhhhh, ah fuck-” 

Hot white ropes shoot deep into your throat as he releases. His melodic moans and whining cries form a grand symphony that fills your bedroom - in this moment, you are absolutely certain that you've never heard a more beautiful sound. 

His cock pulsates in your mouth, letting out every last spurt of cum for you to eagerly swallow. As he finishes, you slowly slide his cock out of your mouth - still marveling at the sheer size of it. 

“Oh my god,” he groans softly. You swing your leg over his head, turning yourself around to lay beside him. You wrap your arms around his torso, becoming the big spoon as you nuzzle your face into his neck. 

“Wow,” he proclaims with a deep, satisfied exhale. He lays silently as he recovers, catching his breath and coming back down to earth. Finally, with a sigh, he turns to face you. You raise your head up enough for your noses to meet. 

Jihoon gazes into your eyes, eyelids heavy in his post-orgasmic bliss. He hesitates, bringing his hand up to your cheek and cradling it gently. 

“Can I kiss you?” he finally asks, his voice no more than a soft whisper. 

You nod. He kisses you - this time not hungry and desperate, but slow and saccharine. Your lips lock, laying there entangled in each other’s embrace - his muscular arms hold you tight, enveloping you in the warmth radiating from both of your sweat-covered bodies. As your lips eventually part, you remain snuggled by his side - him playing with your hair while you trace your fingertips over his toned body. Eventually, he takes your chin delicately in his hand, tilting your face up to look at him. 

“I don’t know if fucking your next door neighbor is necessarily a wise thing to do,” he starts. “But that was incredible. You’re incredible.”

You smile. 

“I don't know either,” you chuckle. “But the way you basically broke down my door to come fuck me was really hot.”

Jihoon laughs, his face lighting up with a beaming smile. 

“Yeah, um. I'm not entirely sure what compelled me to do that.”

“I do,” you inform him. “You were thinking with your dick.”

“Okay yeah, you're right,” he admits with a grin. 

He reaches for your hand, interlacing his fingers with yours, squeezing your palm. 

“Would you want to do this again?” 

“Like, right now?” you reply. 

“No I mean like- … well, yes actually,” he answers, his face lighting up with excitement. “But I meant like, in the future.”

You nod, a wide grin spreading across your face. 

“I’d like that.”

“Good,” he smiles. “Me too.”

“But also…”

Your arms grab hold of him, rolling him over on top of you. He tries to shift, to not be placing his whole weight upon you, but you cling to him tightly, holding him in place. You roll your hips, stroking his still half-erect cock with your soaked cunt; you feel it pulse in response, already beginning to harden again. 

“I want you to fuck me,” you speak softly into his ear, continuing to grind your pussy on his cock. His eyes roll back in his head once more. 

“God you're so fucking hot,” he mumbles through gritted teeth. His eyelashes flutter as his eyes open again, peering down at you amorously. 

“Give me just a minute, baby,” he says as he shifts downward, positioning himself directly in front of your boobs. He grabs one with each hand, kneading the soft flesh in his grasp. He licks your nipple, swirling his tongue around the protruding bud, wetting it with his warm mouth before switching to your other breast. He gives them equal attention, licking and sucking on them, back and forth - whichever boob isn't in his mouth, he pinches your hard nipple, squeezing and rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. You press your hips up into his stomach, seeking any relief for your aching clit, but it's not enough. You whimper as he latches on to your left nipple, suckling on it so long you think you might cum again just from this. You feel the bed move beneath you as he grinds his cock against the sheets, thrusting into the mattress, seeking relief for his returned erection. 

He lifts his head up, releasing his latch on your breast with a wet-sounding pop. His eyes stay fixed on you as he shifts further down the bed, resting comfortably between your legs as his lips hover above your cunt. 

“Is this okay?” he checks before placing his mouth on you. You nod earnestly, brushing your fingers through his damp, messy hair. His tongue locates your entrance, slipping into your pussy, his nose brushing up against your clit, still highly sensitive from your first orgasm. You moan as his tongue glides through your folds, his face becoming soaked once again in your juices. He flickers over your clit, the warmth and wetness of his tongue quickly sending you over the edge. Your body writhes beneath him as you cum a second time, crying out with even greater pleasure than the first. It's almost overbearing, but you relish in it, delicious waves of bliss pulsating throughout your whole being. His tongue slows, licking you softly as you lay there, unable to move for a few good minutes, basking in the aftermath of your orgasm. Your fist slowly unclenches, releasing the grip you didn't realize you had on his tousled locks. 

“Damn,” you mumble, a big goofy grin spreading across your face. Jihoon crawls back up toward you, kissing you with lips drenched in your own cum. His cock, fully hard once more, brushes against your cunt. Although you're still trying to catch your breath, you place your entrance against his tip to taunt him. 

“Please fuck me,” you beg, desperate to feel him inside you. 

He pushes his cockhead into your pussy, letting out a moan as he feels your warmth. Your walls tighten as he slides the rest of his length in, fully enveloping his cock - he whines, loudly, letting the delicious sensation overtake him. He rests for a moment inside you, fearing to move as he feels the urge to cum already. But he’s too aroused to resist for much longer - slowly he begins to pump into you, deep thrusts stretching you out, filling you up like you've never felt before. He’s almost too big, but you love it. Tears well in your eyes again as he fucks you -  slow and tender at first, but gradually increasing his pace, soon pounding into you with powerful force. The stretch is overwhelming, but his long strokes and perfect tempo have you screaming his name, voluminous cries filling the air as he fucks you like you’ve never been fucked before. 

“You’re taking me so well baby,” he praises, his voice low and breathy. “So pretty…”

His voice trails off. High-pitched grunts and groans escape him as his body begins to stiffen, another climax rapidly on its way. He drives his cock into you, your perfect pussy squeezing him so tight that he can't think straight. 

“Y/n…” he cries. “Fuck, y/n I'm cumming…”

With several powerful thrusts he releases deep inside you, warm cum filling you up until you're completely full - so full that it begins to leak out of you, coating his cock and dripping all over the sheets. He finishes, laying frozen on top of you, heaving breaths echoing in your ear as he sinks his face into the crook of your neck. His cock rests inside you still, twitching occasionally against your walls. His breathing becomes so steady that you start to think he’s fallen asleep - but eventually he lifts his head, resting his temple on his fist as he takes in the sight of you, so pretty and fucked out beneath him. A lazy smile appears on his face as he stares at you, his pink cheeks glowing in his post-orgasm state. He looks so good that you involuntarily let out a little giggle. 

“What?” he asks, his grin growing wider. 

“You're just really hot, that's all.”

His face somehow turns even rosier. He lets out an embarrassed tsk as he tries to hide his face in his hands. 

“What? You are!!” you proclaim, pulling his hands away so you can see him again. 

“Sorry,” he replies timidly. “I’m not good with compliments.”

“You'll get used to it,” you say matter-of-factly. He raises an eyebrow at you. 

“You say that like this is going to be a regular thing now,” he retorts, trying to keep a straight face - but the corners of his mouth twitch upward, revealing the grin he's trying to hold back. 

“Do you want it to be?” you ask. 

Unable to hide his smile any longer, he nods. 

“I’d like that.”

Slowly, he pulls his spent cock out of you, making you whine at the empty sensation as even more of his cum spills out of you. 

“Wait here,” he says, giving you a soft kiss on your cheek as he rises from the bed. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

[millers-angel]

I need more about this fic (beach trip). Please give us more chapters, more drama, more smut.

beach trip — second night.

dbf!joel miller x f!reader

thanks to everyone who read the first part! <3 first of all, the dry humping part is because of that damn picture, look how bulky he is, anyone would be lucky to dry hump him. this is mostly smut! summary: the day after losing your virginity to your dad's best friend, you just want more, no matter if other people are around, but also you sneak to joel's room in the middle of the night. warnings: dry humping in public, use of pet names, masturbation, oral (m receiving), unprotected sex (reader isn't on birth control), praising kink, creampie. wc: 5.5k

You were taking a sunbath by the beach, on those bed-like lounge chairs. Dad and Joel were most likely at the bar, but you... you have your mind somewhere else.

You haven't stopped thinking about last night, it was... a lot. You've been thinking about tonight, about sneaking to Joel's room when you're sure dad is not gonna interrupt.

You haven't stopped thinking about last night, about the way Joel touched you, how he made you feel things you never even knew you could. It didn’t matter that he’d been an idiot before with that guy at the bar—he more than made up for it. Besides, he proved something you’d been dying to know: he wanted you, at least in that way.

Joel was always so quiet, so reserved, but last night... last night he was anything but that. He showed you a different side of him, one that made you weak and your body ache to feel him again.

You were trying to think of something else, the beach, how nice the weather was even, but then it was just him again.

"Hey," to your surprise, it was him, Joel, sitting next to you in the chair.

"Hey," you fixed your hair nervously, as if he could read your mind. "Where's dad?"

He nodded at the direction he came from. "Found some folks who played cards... so he will be busy for a bit," you both chuckled.

"Oh, well..." you played with your feet. "You didn't want to join them?"

He made a face. "Not really," he sighed. "Also, your dad asked me to keep an eye on you."

You scoffed, crossing your own arms. “He thinks I can’t take care of myself?”

Joel chuckled, his gaze full of amusement. “Wow, and here I thought you wouldn’t complain.”

Your cheeks flushed. It was embarrassing how much you actually wanted to be around him. How you’d been waiting for a chance to sneak away together again. But you wouldn’t admit that, not out loud.

“I’m not complaining,” you mumbled, trying to sound nonchalant.

His grin was wide. “Sure doesn’t sound like it,” he teased. “Actin’ like you didn’t like it last night.”

Your heart skipped, your mouth opening and closing as you tried to come up with something to say. But nothing came out, not when the memory of his hands on you was so fresh, so vivid.

"Are you sore, though?" he asked.

"Do I look sore?" you teased back.

Joel’s eyes trailed over you, slower this time, taking his time as he looked you up and down. You were stretched out on the lounge chair, your sun-kissed skin glowing under the light. The two-piece swimsuit shaped every curve perfectly, leaving just enough to his imagination, although he has already seen it. His gaze locked on the way the fabric sat on your hips, how it pressed on your breasts, how your slopes pump perfectly for him.

“You look…” His voice was low, almost a murmur. “You look good.” His eyes darkened, going back up to meet yours, but not before taking one more long look at you. “Too good.”

Your heart skipped a beat, heat blooming across your cheeks and between your legs. You swallowed, suddenly self-counscious of how little you were wearing, how exposed you felt under his gaze—and how much you liked it.

But you couldn’t help yourself—you looked at him the same way.

He was wearing swim trunks, low on his hips. Your eyes swayed, just for a moment, stopping at the way he was bulky on the crotch, your mouth went dry. You knew you shouldn’t look, but you couldn’t help it.

When you looked back up, his eyes were on you, his lips curling into that lazy, knowing smirk. “Caught you starin’, sweet girl.”

Your face went hot, and you quickly looked away. “Was not,” you mumbled, but you could still feel his eyes on you.

He leaned in just a little, his voice dropping to a low murmur. “Liar.”

You huffed. "So what? You were doin' the same thing, old man."

“Old man, huh?” He leaned back, crossing his arms. “You keep callin’ me that and you're gonna end up on your knees.”

You swallowed. "Why would I even get on my knees for?" You knew what he meant, but you wanted to play with him.

He chuckled, his gaze dropped to your lips, staying there before his eyes met yours. He leaned in, his face close enough that you could feel his breath against your skin. "You're a little tease, aren't you, angel?"

"Yeah? What you're gonna do about it?"

His grin widened. There it was—the bratty virgin he talked about last night. Sure, you weren’t a virgin anymore, but that defiance was still there, alive and kicking. It made him chuckle.

He liked that about you. Hell, he liked everything about you.

"What am I gonna do? I just told you, I'm gonna get you on your knees."

Your breath hitched, your eyes searching his for some sign of hesitation, but all you saw was hunger, raw and unapologetic. Your heart raced. You were dangerously close now, his face inches from yours but your eyes never left his.

His hand slid up, resting on your inner thigh, fingers curling just slightly. His touch was gentle. “You keep lookin’ at me like that,” his voice dropped to a rough whisper, “and I’m not gonna be able to stop myself.”

"Too bad we're in public," you teased, taking a step back from him.

His eyes darkened, his jaw clenching as you stepped away. But before you could take another breath, he closed the distance, his hand catching your waist, pulling you against him. His mouth was on yours, rough and demanding, lips firm as his fingers dug into your skin.

You gasped, but he swallowed the sound, his tongue teasing yours, his other hand slipping to the back of your neck to hold you there. When he finally pulled away, his eyes were wild, his breathing heavy. “Public or not, you keep pushin’ me, and I won’t care who’s watchin’.”

You bit your lip decided to be brave enough to test him. Your lips pressed against his again, not rough as he had been, but gentle, the softness of your lips makes him weak, needy.

Your hand dropped to his lap, going up to his crotch, feeling the shape of his dick over the fabric of his trunks. He broke the kiss immediately.

He looked around and there was almost anyone on the beach—not close at least, just people taking sunbaths near the shore.

His gaze darkened and you just laughed, as if you've won, which you're far from doing.

"I need you to go to the shore and come back, then you sit on my lap." His voice was commanding, not playful.

"What?"

"If you don't want that then we can just fuck here, right now."

You blinked and stood up, walking slowly to the shore as he asked you to, slightly letting your feet get damped with water. You turned around before walking to him.

He had shifted in his seat, now lounging on the bed-like beach chair with his legs slightly apart, looking relaxed but undeniably masculine. His arms were draped casually, his posture lazy yet somehow commanding, his eyes fixed on you.

You sighed and made your way to him, kinda nervous, what does he has in mind? Fucking? No, it would be dangerous.

But you did as he said and when you got to him, you sat on his lap. His arms wrapped you immediately.

"Now you're gonna cum, sweet girl." He said leaving sloppy kisses on your back.

"What?" You gulped. "How?"

"You're gonna move these," his hands shifted to your hips and patted them. "But slow... unless you want to make a scene, or worse."

You could fight with him on that, maybe tell him he was a pervert for doing something like that in public, but the truth is... you want it as much as he does.

You nodded and started doing as he said. Slowly swaying your hips on his bulge. There it was, you could feel it in your core, bricked up and throbbing, pleading to come out.

You weren't an expert, in fact, you've done this only once with a guy and it was nothing like this. You had no idea if you were moving good—you weren't, but it felt good. It looked adorable to him, the way you let your body guide you.

One of his hands shifted from your hips to your chest, he let it rest on your breast, cupping it, squeezing it just a little, making you feel good, making you shiver.

You were muffling moans, trying not to do anything that might attract atention, but you were failing.

"Better keep it quiet." He said against your ear.

You let your butt fell a little too hard on his crotch, making him groan. "Better keep it quiet," you teased, looking at him over your shoulder.

His hand curled on your hair, pulling it a little. He thrusts his hips up, meeting your movements, his movements becoming more frenzied as he chases his own pleasure.

"Joel—" you whimpered.

You can feel it in your core, you're all wet, sensitive. Joel smirks, feeling your body shudder against him.

"You're so responsive," he says, his voice low and rough. "It drives me fucking crazy."

He tightens his grip on your hips, guiding your movements as you continue to grind against him, his own body trembling with need.

"Does it feel good?" You asked softly.

You could feel his cock twitching, he must be glazing inside his trunks, just as you are. He groaned and pulled your hair in response. His thrusts became faster, more needy than before.

His hand dropped your hair to come to your inner thighs, spreading your legs just enough to make his way to your crotch, finding your clit over your swimsuit.

You couldn't help to moan when he started drawing circles on it, he could feel how warm and wet you were, how swollen and flushed your poor little pussy must be. The idea drove him crazy enough to come, but he didn't—yet.

Your movements went more frentic too. Now either of you could hide what you were doing, and couldn't care less about the people nearby too. You were too lost in each other, like two cavemen driven by raw instinct, seeking nothing but pleasure.

Your walls throbbed and your whole body was twitching, it felt too good. Joel's fingers work faster, his touch becoming more firm as he circles your clit, his other hand holding you steady so you can grind against him even more.

He was in pain, he needed to come, but he wanted you to do it first. He can feel your softness over the clothes, he can feel how wet you are for him, how needy you are.

"I'm gonna—"

"Yeah, that it. Come f'me." He growled on your ear.

He pressed his fingers too hard on your clit and one moment to the other, your hips movements went low, but that didn't stop him to keep playing with your clit, as he creamed his trunks.

You both were panting, trying to catch your breaths. You didn't move from his lap, just let your body go limp over him. He chuckled and moved you to the chair, laying you back down gently. His eyes met yours, a satisfied grin on his face.

“That was…” you started, still catching your breath, “I liked that.”

His fingers brushed a stray hair from your face. “Yeah?” He leaned in, his lips ghosting over yours. “Me too, angel. More than you know.”

"Did you finish?" you asked, barely confused.

He laughed. "I did,"

You bit your lip. "Can I see?"

"What?"

"Yeah, I mean, I wanna see how it looks," You swallowed. "If that's okay."

His gaze was filled with amusment, and this time, he looked around before lifting his trunks. You moved your head immediately to take a peep of him.

Your gaze darkened when you saw the mess you made. His pubes were all covered in cum, so was his length, his tip all flushed and swollen.

Your hand moved, wanting to touch him, but he held your wrist and fixed his trunks before you could go any further.

"You need it that bad?"

Your heart raced, his words sinking in. You looked up at him, cheeks warming as you whispered, “I want to do it again.”

He laughed softly, a deep, rumbling sound that made your stomach flutter. “Oh, I know.” His voice low and rough, “But not here. Not where anyone can see you like this.”

You shivered at his possessive tone, a heat sparking inside you all over again. “Tonight?” you asked, a little breathless.

“Yeah,” he promised, his thumb tracing your jawline. “Tonight.”

The day passed slowly. You spent the afternoon with your dad and Joel, watching the sunset from the beach, the sky painted in shades of pink and orange as the waves lapped at the shore. It was peaceful, dad's arm around your shoulders as he talked about old memories, laughing at his own jokes. You missed moments like this—simple, carefree.

Later, the three of you went to dinner. The restaurant was lively, filled with laughter and clinking glasses. Joel sat across from you, occasionally meeting your eyes with a knowing look that made your heart race. You tried to act normal, joining the conversation, laughing at dad’s stories, but you couldn’t ignore the way Joel’s leg brushed against yours under the table.

After dinner, as you all headed back to your rooms, your dad stopped you, his hand on your shoulder. “Hey, the bar’s having live music tonight,” he said. “If you wanna go, have some fun.”

You smiled. “I’ll think about it.”

Joel’s voice was casual, but his eyes sparkled with mischief. “Thought I saw you there last night... with some guy.”

You held back a laugh, thinking about how shameless he could be. “Yeah? It was boring, though,” you said, your eyes meeting his for a split second before you looked away. “Probably won’t go again.”

Your dad nodded, giving you a warm smile. “Well, up to you. It’s your vacation, kiddo. Goodnight.” He gave you a quick hug before walking to his room.

“Goodnight, daddy,” you called after him, your heart fluttering as Joel stayed a moment longer, his gaze lingering before he turned away.

You stood there for a moment, the night air cool against your skin, knowing exactly where you’d be once your dad fell asleep.

You went back to your room, closing the door quietly behind you. The events of the day replayed in your mind as you turned on the shower, letting the warm water wash away the sand and salt. You took your time, the anticipation building with every passing second.

Once you were out, you slipped into a pair of shorts and an oversized shirt. It wasn’t anything sexy—not like you had planned on doing anything during this trip. Still, you couldn’t help but feel a flutter in your chest at the thought of where you were headed.

You waited, listening carefully, making sure your dad’s room was silent. Then, heart pounding, you slipped out of your room, moving quickly down the hall. You barely breathed as you ran to Joel’s door, the cool tiles cold under your feet.

You knocked once, and the door opened almost immediately. His hand shot out, grabbing your waist as he pulled you inside, the door clicking shut behind you.

His lips were on yours before you could speak, rough and desperate, his hands on your hips, pressing you against him. You gasped, fingers curling in his shirt, and he groaned, his mouth moving hungrily over yours.

“Couldn't wait, huh?” he whispered against your lips, his voice low, teasing.

Your heart raced, your knees weakening as his hands tightened on your waist. “Neither could you,” you shot back, and he laughed, his mouth crashing against yours again.

Your breath hitched when his hands moved lower, gripping the back of your thighs. Before you could react, he lifted you effortlessly, your legs wrapping around his waist. You clung to him.

He laid you down on the bed, his body pressing over yours, his weight warm and familiar. His eyes were dark, trailing you as he leaned in, his lips brushing your jaw, your neck.

You shivered, your heart pounding as his mouth moved lower, his hands sliding under your shirt, his touch sending sparks down your spine.

“Still thinkin’ about last night?” he murmured, his voice rough against your skin.

Your fingers tightened on his shoulders, your breath catching as his mouth found yours again. “Yeah… and tonight.”

His laugh was deep, his lips curving against yours before he kissed you harder, his hands exploring, his body pressing closer. “Good.”

"You promised I could touch you tonight."

Oh, so you really meant it, he thought.

"We're gonna talk first, sweet girl." He clicked his tongue.

You nodded, shifting your position in bed to sit on your knees.

“Have you ever touched a man… like that?” You sighed and shook your head. “Before last night, have you ever seen someone’s dick?”

Your cheeks flushed. “I mean, not in person,”

“What?” He frowned, confused.

“Just… just in videos.” It was more embarrassing than you thought, it should be a common thing, right? But it felt embarrassing to admit.

His smile made you feel even worse. “You’re a filthy little thing, huh?”

You rolled your eyes. “Forget it,”

“There it is, the stubborn virgin,” he seemed delighted.

“I’m not a virgin anymore.”

“You act like one,” he shrugged. “So if you watched those videos, I’m assuming you touch yourself,”

“No, I actually watch them for fun, Joel,” your tone laced with sarcasm.

“Show me,” his gaze went dark. “I wanna see how you touch yourself.”

You chuckled. “Why?”

His fingers played with the hem of your shirt before taking it off. “Because I wanna see it,” He could feel it, you were wearing nothing under it, your nipples went hard when they felt the cold breeze.

“Am I gonna touch you after?”

He nodded. “You’re gonna get on your knees after you show me how you touch yourself.”

You took a deep breath and he got rid of your shorts, leaving you bare on the bed. Your hands instinctively covering your private parts.

“You get naked too,” you murmured.

That’s fair. He took off his shirt, hair messy once it went over his head and the shirt fall to the floor, followed by his pants and boxers.

Your mouth went dry and your toes curled up on the sheet.

He chuckled and drew your knees apart, making you flush. “Now touch yourself,”

One kiss. It had been one kiss and a little touch from his side and you were already wet. Your pussy was puffy, flushed and slick with juices.

You take a deep breath and close your eyes, you’re dying of the embarrassment, you've never done something like this. You spread your legs just a little more, ready to stroke your swollen and aching clit.

Once your fingers brushed it, you can't help to moan at your own touch. You draw circles around it. You let his name escape from your mouth once or twice, it's involuntary, but it has an effect on him.

He was delighted with the view, what a treasure his friend brought to earth. She was perfect. Your little fingers trying their best to get you pleasure.

"Get your fingers inside that pretty little hole." His voice makes you shiver.

You nod as you can and get a finger inside. It makes you whimper, even if it’s not as thick as his, it feels good. Your hips bucking at your own pace.

He was delighted hearing your little moans, seeing how your fingers comes out slick and the sound they make.

You feel his hand in your thigh, you open your eyes to look at him.

"Now let's try my fingers," he says. "Is that okay?" he asks.

"Y-yes," you say. "Please.”

He trail his fingers all over your pussy lips, his thumb stays in your clit and draw circles around it adding a little press every time he touched it. You can't help to whimper.

He tease your cunt with his index finger. "P-please, Joel," you say almost begging.

He slides a finger inside, slowly. Your back arches. You bite your lip to stifle a moan. "How does it feel?" he groans.

"F-fucking good," your voice laced with pleasure.

He doesn't stop rubbing your clit as he moves his index finger. "You’re fucking tight," he mumbles. "You have a pretty little thing in here." he made you spread your legs more to take a better look of your pussy.

"Is it okay of we try two fingers?" you nod.

He goes for the second finger and this time, you start to hear your own juices as he gets his fingers inside and out. "She needs to be touched so bad." he says groaning and you nod.

You lean your head against the headboard, parting your lips, letting moans escape from your mouth.

"Joel—" you cry out.

"Yeah?" he asks as he stops moving his fingers.

"Don't—" you feel like you're about to come. "Don't stop."

"Poor baby," his voice low, teasing. "She needs to come, doesn't she?" You nod.

He starts rubbing your clit again, moving his fingers inside you a little faster than before.

You grasp the pillow and say his mame over and over as your cunt throbs in his fingers. "'s okay," he says. "You're doing good," he sounds so... soft. "You can let it go."

And you do when he gives you the word, his hand is all wet and sticky because of you.

"Joel—" You feel the bed a little wet too. You can't stop heavily breathing. He rubs your head and kiss your forehead.

You were a little embarrassed, never shown yourself like this to anyone. And maybe—just maybe, he could feel your embarrassment because he cupped your cheek.

“You did it amazing, angel.”

You licked your lips and trailed him, searching for something in his eyes, and it wasn’t hard to find. His gaze was all dark, it took you seconds to look down to his crotch, seeing him all bricked up.

“It’s my turn now.”

He chuckled and you stood up, walking to his side of the bed, kneeling in front of him. Just as he said, he would get you on your knees.

He was amused watching the scene, you were between his thighs, eager to touch him and waiting for his orders.

You rested your head on his inner thigh, looking up to him. His hand cupped your cheek.

“You don’t have to.” He said, since you just had an orgasm, maybe you need more time.

You frowned. “You don’t want to?”

“I do, but—“

“I want it too, you promised, Joel.”

His grin grew wider and he held his cock, stroking it a little. You could see a drop of precum leaking from the tip, his thumb swirling around it, it sent tingles to your core.

“Go ahead, touch me.”

You bit your lip and just as last night, your first instinct was to touch his tip, and still had the same effect on him, but this time, he didn’t stop you.

Your finger trailed his length, his cock twitching at your touch. You’ve never seen anything like this, it was… huge, everything about it. His balls even. You fisted him, doing what you’ve seen in the videos, your hand pumping him.

He hissed, you were being too harsh all at once, he was sensitive. Your skin smooth and soft against his, it was too much. You were too much, without even trying.

You leaned your head, eager to taste him. But you raised your gaze first, as if asking him if it was okay, which he responded with his hand guiding you to his dick. Fingers digging on your scalp.

Your lips brushed his tip and you could feel how warm he was before wrapping your lips around him. He grunted, he ain’t lasting, not with you being like this.

You swirled your tongue on his tip, the white fluid tastes… salty, but not bad. You like it. You decided to go further and bury yourself on his cock.

It was too much, it made you gag. “Hey,” he said softly. “You okay?”

You nodded and this time you did it slower, trying to figure out how far can you get. Then you started to go in and out on him, with his help. He was guiding your head.

His cock twitches on your mouth, you can feel his pubes beneath your chin.

Your palm lies on his belly and pull his hairs. "Taking this cock so good." he groans. "That's it, you want it all, don't you?"

He has both hands on your head, pushing you deep down, but still, you can't get it all in your mouth.

"You’re too big," you mumble and as soon as you finished the sentence, he flipped you over.

You're on your back again. He's pumping himself, you're not breaking eye contact, you love hearing the slapping sounds he makes, mixed with his whimpers.

He's imagining your pretty face glazed in cum. But not today, he needs to fuck you to cum.

Without any warning, he slams his cock inside you, making you whine. It feels too good to complain about him not wearing a condom, about going raw.

But you have to. “Joel,” you said in a moan. “The condom,”

“Fuck it,” he grunted. “I need you like this.”

And who were you to complain? You were too lost in the sensation. You were craving this again, the way he thrusts, the way his cock fills you every time.

You’re grasping to his arm but he held your wrist to the pillow, intertwining your hands.

Your legs were pushing him down at you. Your bodies melted against each other, becoming one.

“Fucking tight,” he groaned on your ear.

He thrusted harder, making you let go off his hands to dig your nails on his back, dragging them all over it, no matter if you leave scratches, he couldn’t care less.

At some point, he couldn’t help himself, being as tough as he would be normally. You seemed to enjoy it, by the way your moans filled the room, by the way your walls throbs.

“Such a good girl,” he said softly.

Your body stiffened, he knows the orgasm is already in your belly, you're just holding it, but you don't want this to stop. You look adorable being all aroused, being fucked.

You curl your toes. "It's okay, you don't need to hold it," he assures. "I want you to come."

You shake your head and press your lips against his, pulling him down furiously. Tasting him, exploring his mouth as you reach the orgasm.

God knows how much he held it, but your walls were choking him, the way your body was shaking beneath him, he lost it.

He didn’t even have time to pull out, he came inside you. And for a moment he didn’t even care, he would love to be the one to get you all round, carrying his child.

You didn’t seem to care either, not in the moment. It was pure pleasure, you’ve never felt anything like that—being filled, feeling something bubbling inside you.

It made you see the stars.

You sticked together for a couple of seconds, just panting. He pressed his lips against your forehead and then you looked for his lips.

He pressed your foreheads together before pulling out, a loud pop sound, then he left you empty.

"Stay still," he asked holding your knees, spreading them apart.

It was the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, your pussy was leaking his cum. He's gonna get hard again to that view. But instead, he dip two fingers in your cunt, making you wince.

"I'm sorry," he said and you nodded.

He got out as much as he could, his fingers all sticky, coating in white. You were watching what he was doing, licking your lips without even noticing.

"Hungry, angel?" he asked, tone teasing.

You breathed. "I... I just—"

Before you could finish, his fingers were over your lips, and you opened your mouth like a fool, letting him make you taste his cum.

You sucked his fingers clean, hollowing your cheeks. You were too naughty for your own good.

"Good girl." His voice laced with amusement.

He wiped down the rest and then collapsed beside you on the bed, his body sinking into the mattress. You turned over, lying on your stomach, your head facing him. Silence settled between you, the only sound coming from the distant crash of the ocean waves outside.

Your mind now was in a war, thinking about the consequences of what just happened. You thought about protection, about the risks... but the thought didn’t last long. It drifted away as easily as it came. You were here, with him, and that was all that mattered.

You closed your eyes for a moment before murmuring, “You’re gonna have to put me on birth control.”

He laughed, low and rough, the sound sending a shiver down your spine. “Oh, so you’re already planning on sneakin’ into my room again?”

You bit your lip, your eyes sparkling with mischief. “Maybe... if you’re lucky.”

His eyes darkened, his fingers brushing along your spine, teasingly slow. “Angel, luck’s got nothin’ to do with it. You’ll be back.”

You laughed, soft and warm, letting the sound melt between you two. Then, you leaned in to press your lips against his cheek, taking him by surprise. He looked at you, eyes softening as he cupped your face.

"When we get back home?" your eyes lighted up. "How are we gonna do? I was thinking maybe you could—I don't know, maybe teach me how to drive?"

He chuckled. "Is that your plan to keep seeing me?"

You shrugged. "Dad promised he would teach me but he never did, so maybe his friend can take his place."

He laughed, amused, you're adorable sometimes. “What am I gonna do with you?”

You shrugged, a playful grin on your lips. “I don’t know... enjoy me?”

His laugh was deep, sending a flutter through your chest. "Okay, we'll see about that."

"And the birth control."

He grinned, his hand slipping on your stomach, his fingers warm against your skin. “I wouldn’t mind gettin’ you all round for me,” he teased, his voice low as he pressed a light kiss to your cheek.

Your face went hot, a rush of warmth spreading through you. You grabbed his hand, holding it against your belly as you looked up at him, a playful glint in your eyes. “Yeah? I bet you’d like that, huh?”

He chuckled, his nose brushing yours. "Maybe."

You closed your eyes, a small, satisfied smile still lingering as you relaxed beside him, of course you were joking, you knew your dad would kill him if that happens, Joel would get you on birth control. The sound of the waves outside lulled you, and before you knew it, sleep pulled you under.

Tangled in his sheets, you looked like an angel, even with your back bare and hair sprawled across the pillow. He watched you for a moment, shaking his head. You looked so innocent, but an hour ago, you were anything but that.

—

The next morning, you sat at breakfast, the sun warming your face. You were sipping your juice when your dad looked at you curiously. “So, did you end up going to the bar last night?”

You kept your expression neutral, shrugging casually. “Nope, didn’t go.”

He shook his head, clicking his tongue. “You know, you need to loosen up a little. Quit bein’ so shy all the time.”

You nearly choked on your juice. You glanced at Joel, who was fighting back a grin, his eyes filled with amusement. If only your dad knew you still have a part of his friend bubbling inside you. If only your dad knew his daughter was fucking the man sitting right next to him.

Your face went hot, and you pulled your knees up onto the chair, hugging them to hide your smile. You managed to mumble, “I’ll, uh... work on that,” trying not to burst into laughter.

Your dad’s eyes dropped to your legs, his brows knitting together. “Jesus, kid, look at your knees. That ocean’s been rough on you, huh? Must’ve taken quite a beating.” He shook his head, his tone teasing. “You gotta be more careful.”

You bit your lip, your eyes sliding to Joel, who was pretending to be very focused on his coffee. Careful... right. You swallowed a laugh, heat pooling low as you remembered just how you got those bruises. If only your dad knew how much you’d enjoyed getting them.

[scarletlizzard]

Inked Desires - Part 3

(Part 1) (Part 2)

Pairing: gp!Natasha × fem!Reader

Tags Minors DNI: natasha has a dick, miscommunication, unprotected sex, breeding, cheesy shit

Masterlist

A/n: Thank you to everyone who stuck around for this part, and thank you for 1,000 followers! 🥳 There are no more parts to this, but I do have some drabbles I'd like to write for it if y'all are interested 🫶 Please leave some feedback, and thank you again for reading ❤️

Art Creds for the first 2 pics: @sweet--escape17 (Please go check out their art, it's amazing!)

Also, shoutout: @oolsen (Thanks for helping me with the plot when I get stuck!)

****

Your eyes glaze over as you stare at the screen of your phone, looking at the same messages that had been sitting in your conversation with Natasha for the past week. You replay the events from the last night you saw her at Joe's bar, wondering where you went wrong. An entire week, gone, and not a single text. No 'Good Morning'. No 'Have a great day'. No ridiculous smiling emojis attached to an even more ridiculous joke. Instead, a one-sided conversation with yourself:

Y/N: I had so much fun last night!

Y/N: Have a good day, baby <3

Y/N: Maybe we can get together soon? Kate told me about a fair happening nearby next weekend. I think that might be fun!

Y/N: Hey, is everything okay?

It wasn't like Natasha to not text you back. The two of you had practically talked every day since meeting, and when you hadn't, she always had a good reason for not replying. Most of the time, it had been you that was too busy to text back... but now the quietness of the empty chat in the palm of your hand allowed an eerie loneliness to seep into your chest, along with a feeling of guilt.

***

"Come on, it'll be fun! " Kates voice rings in your ear from your phone. A sigh spills from your lips as you shake your head, knowing she can't see you.

"I don't know, I'm just not really in the mood..." You mumble into the speaker and silently thank the man who opens the door for you. The smell of freshly brewed coffee enters your nose, a small sense of comfort filling the cracks in your chest.

"Well, you don't really have a choice. You already know I'm dragging you with me... Plus, you can't be in a bad mood when you're eating caramel popcorn," You can practically see the grin on Kates face, knowing how much you loved the simple fair treat. You can also hear movement from the other side of the phone, raising an eyebrow as Kate shuffles around.

"Alright then, fine. Only for the popcorn," you sigh again as Kate cheers. She tells you goodbye as you walk up to the counter to order your usual latte. You pay and move to the opposite side of the counter to await your drink, when you spot a familiar red head in the corner.

Your eyes widen, chest bursting at the sight of Natasha. The feelings hit you all at once, guilt, anger, confusion. Overwhelmingly at the top, happiness. Her brows pull together in concentration at the paper, headphones rest atop her head as she sketches away in a notebook. Her short sleeve shirt reveals her inked skin, and you feel the familiar desire for her all over again.

You give yourself a second longer to stare, a second longer to mentally prepare yourself for what you want to say. Where have you been? Why haven't you texted me back? But as you step closer to the table, and her kind green eyes move away from the paper and to your not so composed stature, your mind seemingly empties.

"Hi," you say with a small smile after she removes her headphones. Natasha clears her throat awkwardly. You want to kiss her red cheeks.

"Y/N, hey," the smile she gives you back doesn't seem genuine, causing your own to fade.

"I've texted you a few times. Is... everything okay?" You ask, a small tilt of your head.

"Um, yeah, you know. I've just been busy?" She avoids your eyes, her body language distant as she crosses her arms with a shrug. You glimpse at the notebook open on the table, an intricate design of lines and shapes, before she closes it abruptly. "I actually have to get to work," Natasha sighs and throws the notebook and pencils into her bag. You don't miss the fact she's not wearing her work shirt.

"Right." You click your tongue as she stands, the tension in the air killing both of you.

As badly as Natasha wanted to pull you into her arms and kiss the worry off of your face, she couldn't. She couldn't deal with the fact she wanted more and that it was reciprocated. She couldn't deal with the fact that she wanted late night talks and laughs, while assuming you only wanted late night hookups. She couldn't deal with the fact that she liked you more than she thought she would, while assuming your interest in her was not on the same level.

"Look, can we talk?" Your soft tone surprises her as she stands, her tall frame towering over you. "Maybe tomorrow we can get together and just... talk. Huh, baby?" The term of endearment slips your tongue, and in a last ditch effort, your hand reaches out to softly touch her bicep.

Natasha finally meets your eyes again, and the two of you still for a moment, the coffee shop fading around you. She almost gives into you once again. She was weak against you. You feel her muscles tense in your grip, and the sound of your name being called by the barista takes her attention away from you. She takes a step backward and pulls on her pierced lip with her teeth.

"I uh, I'm hanging out with Yelena tomorrow," she rubs the back of her neck, attempting to sooth her nerves. You only stare up at her, feeling defeated. "Maybe next time."

You frown up at her, the feelings of confusion and anger rising to the surface as she refuses to look you in the eyes. "Sure. Next time."

Natasha opens her mouth to speak again, but no words come out. Instead, she turns her back to you and walks away, leaving you behind.

***

The next day, you found yourself once again staring at the empty conversation on your phone. You had typed up a million different messages, none of them sounding good enough to send. All night, you had tried to come up with the words to say to her. Ranging from paragraphs of you confessing your feelings to a simple, 'Hey, I like you. What are we doing?'

She had said she wanted more, didn't she? Why were you suddenly getting the cold shoulder?

You sigh aloud as you walk into your apartment building, calling Kate for the fourth time since you got off work early. In a rush this morning, you had forgotten your key, and you desperately hoped she was still there to let you in. Trudging slowly up the stairs, you get her voicemail - again.

As you walk up to the familiar sight of your door you knock hard, "Bishop, you'd better have a good fucking reason for not answering my calls," you joke and continue banging on the door. The lock clicks, and the door swings open. "I'm so glad you're home I-" you stop mid sentence, a now unfamiliar sight standing before you.

"Kate saw she had missed calls from you, I think she's hiding," Yelena laughs and steps back inside the apartment as you walk in behind her.

"Yelena.. I- what are you..?" Your heart picks up for a moment, assuming Natasha would be here with her.

"Oh, Kate invited me over for a movie day," her accent is thick as she speaks, and she gives you a friendly smile. Apparently, she was unaware of the current state between you and her sister.

"Aren't you hanging out with Natasha today?" You ask with a tilt of your head. Yelena raises an eyebrow and shakes her own head.

"No?" She questions and returns to her seat on the couch amongst a pile of pillows and blankets.

Your stomach drops. Natasha had lied to you. Why would she lie to you? Your mind begins to spiral at the list of reasons as to why she would. Kate walks out from the bathroom in the hall and sees the furious expression written on your face.

"Uh.. hey, you got off early!" Kate strides across the room towards you. "Everything okay?" She asks.

"Everything's great." You give her a bitter smile, making her eyes widen. "I'm sorry to interrupt your movie day," you look behind Kate to Yelena.

"Well, maybe since you're here, we can call Natasha over?" Yelena looks back to the now wide, sarcastic smile planted on your face.

"You know what, that's actually a great idea," you mutter and walk past Kate towards Yelena, who was already grabbing her phone.

"Y/N," Kate starts, but you quickly silence her with a glare.

"Oh, she finally answers!" Yelena laughs into the speaker and looks to you, blind to the situation unfolding in front of her. "Where are you at? Of course you are, that was a stupid question. Look, I'm at Y/N and Kates, we are having a movie day! Why don't you quit working out for 2 minutes and come over?"

At Yelenas words, you quickly walk to the kitchen counter where your key rests, grabbing it. She was at the gym, of course she was. You don't need to see Yelenas face change as you hear her English switch to fluent Russian. Natasha was finally filling her in. Kate gives you a look that you ignore as you leave the apartment and prepare yourself to make the 5 minute walk to Natashas gym.

The two of you passed by it any time you hung out, always pointing out the fact it was so close to your place and how you wondered why the two of you had never met before her party. Your footsteps are heavy against the sidewalk, and you don't give yourself a second to think about your current state. Still in your work uniformed shirt and slacks, hair a mess, eyes dark underneath from lack of sleep. It didn't matter. You were set on finally confronting her.

You walk inside to see Natasha standing by the weights, an unsurprised look on her face as she watches you move swiftly amongst the workout equipment. Your heart races in your chest, an uneasy feeling as Natasha begins to tower over you the closer you get. You try your best to ignore the tight black tank top she wore, along with the tight black shorts that showed off her toned and tatted thighs. You forced yourself to look only in her eyes.

"Y/N... let me explain," Natasha begins. You roll your eyes and ignore her words, anger bursting from every crack.

"So what is this then? You're just going to fuck me in a dirty bathroom bar then ignore me? Lie to me?" It leaves your mouth faster than you can think about it. Natasha meets your gaze at the words, a hurt expression on her face. Gone are the soft eyes once reserved for you, replaced with the cold stare everyone else receives.

"Are you kidding me? That's funny coming from you, Y/N," she scoffs, tone laced with venom.

"What the fuck does that mean?" You raise your voice, watching as Natasha steps forward towards you.

"Lower your tone," she commands, looking around the gym. You suddenly feel small. "I mean, that's all you want from me, isn't it? Look, I told you I wanted more of-of this," she motions between the two of you. "You don't, and that's fine, but stop trying to text me every time you need to get off." The last part is said in spite, and you feel as if you'd been pushed back. Natasha wanted to take it back as quick as she'd said it, but maybe being harsh was what she needed to get rid of her growing feelings towards you.

"Is that what you think I am? Just some slut trying to use you?" You spit back, watching her face twist in confusion.

"I never said that, Y/N."

"No, but it's implied."

"Unless the words leave my mouth, don't you dare put them in yourself."

"Is that seriously what you think?" You huff out. She nods, standing straight and crossing her arms.

"Well, yeah?" Her voice is unsure as she looks down at you. You sigh loudly, pinching the bridge of your nose with your fingers.

"You are a fucking idiot," you say with a shake of your head. Natasha face contorts as you look back up.

"Excuse m-"

"Why do you think I text you all the time to hang out? Why I invited you to hang out with my friends ?" You ask her in a serious tone, seeing her body language soften. "You want to talk about putting words in mouths? You don't get to say if I do or don't like you - and for your information, I do. A lot," you sigh as you finish your ramble.

"You do?" Is all she says, and you don't know if you want to slap her or kiss her.

"Of course I do.. I thought that was pretty obvious." It's your turn to cross your arms as she brings a hand up to rub her inked neck, her cheeks turning red to match the hair braided behind her.

"It's just - I thought maybe - You didn't -" She stumbles over her words, suddenly with a nervous demeanor.

Natasha wasn't prepared for this. She was prepared for an argument and then to never see you again. She hadn't given it a thought that you actually did reciprocate those feelings. And now here you were standing before her, in her mind, looking as beautiful as ever. She was putty, again.

"You didn't say anything that night back, so I just assumed.." her voice is soft to match her eyes, and you feel that guilt again, seeping out of you.

"Baby.. I'm so sorry. It was only because I was so excited that you felt the same way I did, I didn't know what to say," you reply just as soft and step forward. Natashas eyes spark with life at the use of her favorite word, leaving your lips, and her arm instinctively flexes as you touch her forearm. "Maybe next time, give a girl a moment to gather her thoughts?" You say with a small smile. Your heart leaps at the smile that spreads across her lips.

There's a moment of silence between the two of you, and just like before, the world seems to quiet and blur around you.

"Hi," Natasha chuckles, and you roll your eyes at the familiar game.

"Hi," You giggle back and reach up to cup her cheek. She leans down with a strong hand resting on your hip, lips meeting yours in a gentle kiss.

The two of your pull apart, but her large hand continues to rest on your side as you stand in front of her, now letting your eyes admire her toned muscles that were on display. The black lines on her skin move with every flex in her arm.

"Tell me more about this fair... will there be caramel popcorn?" Natasha asks. Your eyes shoot quickly up to hers as a warmth spreads through your chest.

You hadn't told her about your love for the snack. You lean up and kiss her again, ignoring the confused look on her face and letting yourself melt against her.

***

Lights of all colors of the rainbow seemed to flash around you. The sounds of laughter and screaming of people on the rides filled your ears. Your eyes search the area around you, watching as couples and families walk from stand to stand. A few teenagers run by, and a loud ringing and a cry of, "Winner!" catches your attention from next to you.

"Holy shit!" Kate laughs and taps your arm, showing you the brown teddy bear she won. You can't help but smile at the sight.

"Only took you about ten tries," you laugh along with her, reaching out to check out the bear. As you hand it back to her, you notice her eyes trail above your head. Then, a pair of thick arms wrap around your waist from behind. You can smell the familiar scent of the fragrance she wore.

"Well, well, what have we won?" Natasha asks from behind you. You lean back against her, smiling widely as she leans down to press a kiss to your cheek. "Pretty girl.." She mumbles in your ear, fingers tracing the material of your dress.

Things had been going great with Natasha since you talked about your miscommunication. Her morning texts returned, along with nightly chats over the phone until one of you fell asleep. She took you on dates, and you even went with her to the gym. Though, that mostly consisted of you shamelessly checking her out while she blushed gorgeously. You were happy, truly happy. One thing that had been building between the two of you was a certain... tension. The last time you both were intimate was the night at the bar. Since then, there have only been a few heavy make-out sessions and teasing between you. It seemed neither one of you wanted to be the first one to give in to those oh so familiar desires.

"Kate finally won a teddy bear, twenty dollars later," you cough out the last part jokingly and rest your hands on top of Natashas that stayed wrapped securely around you.

Kate groans and rolls her eyes playfully, "You know what? I'm not sharing him with you anymore."

You scoff, feeling Natashas chest rumble as she laughs along with Kate. "Yelena is at the ticket stand, by the way," Natasha says with a small smirk on her lips. Kates eyes widen a bit.

"Oh?" She says with a slow nod. "You know, actually, I think I need some more tickets!" Kate pats her pockets innocently with a shrug and gives you a smile. "Meet you later?" She asks, and you give her nod before she walks away.

Turning in Natashas arms, you finally get a good look at her, and you could drool at the sight of her in her white shirt and blue jeans. Just as always, you can see the pops of color peaking out from the seams, dark lines visible through the thin fabric. Her crooked smile lets a chuckle slip through.

"Alright?" She asks, raising an eyebrow as you continue to gawk at her.

"More than alright," you clear your throat and step back, letting your hand take hers. "Now, are you going to win me a teddy bear, or do I have to do it myself?" You poke her side, and she laughs.

"Step aside, I've got this," Natasha leans down to kiss your forehead, taking out her wallet and handing money to the man in charge of the booth.

"Three shots to knock down the bottles, and it's all yours!" He cheers loudly to gain the attention of others, showing off the teddy bear in question. Natasha takes the ball in her hand, and your eyes are glued to her broad shoulders as she winds up. She throws the ball, missing completely.

"That was just a warm-up," she turns back to look at you, clearing her throat. You stiffle a laugh and purse your lips, nodding.

"Of course, baby! Just a warm-up."

"Two more shots!" The man cries.

Natashas gaze changes from playful to pure concentration, eyes focused intently on the stacked bottles in front of her. She throws again, this time knocking two of the three bottles down. You can't help but let out a giggle this time at the proud expression on her face as she turns to you once more.

"One shot, and it's all yours!" He says loudly, shaking the bear next to her.

"Piece of cake," Natasha says with a laugh. She takes the last ball and winds up again, only to miss completely.

"Ohh, out of luck!" He says with a shrug and moves away. "Who's next?" He yells.

Natasha turns to you with red cheeks, "So maybe I'm not so good at this?" She rubs the back of her neck, and you only shake your head.

"Step aside," you repeat her own words to her, brushing against her as you hand the man money. He goes through his same shpiel and hands you a ball. Only when you go to throw it, the ball hits the bottles perfectly. All three go down instantly.

"Winner!" He yells loudly, handing you the stuffed bear. You smile widley as you take it and return to Natasha, a stunned look on her face.

"But.. how did you.." She shakes her head.

"Here you go, princess," you tease and hand her the bear, giggling as she rolls her eyes but accepts it.

"Alright now, at least let me buy you some popcorn," Natasha laughs along with you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders as you walk.

The two of you spend the next couple of hours riding the carnival rides the fair had to offer, walking around aimlessly, laughing and smiling, teasing each other. You had never felt happier. As you stand there, finally eating your favorite sweet treat, you look at Natasha stood next to you, the sight making you smile. You take out your phone and step back, ignoring the questioning look from her and snap a picture.

You giggle at the image you got of her, the stark contrast of her heavily tattooed and pierced body whilst standing there holding a teddy bear and a box of popcorn was a sight to behold.

"What was that for?" She raises an eyebrow, trying to look at the picture you took.

"Nothing, I just wanted a good memory of this," you smile and put your phone back in your pocket quickly, grabbing another handful of the caramel popcorn. Natasha smiles back. Before she can say anything, a raindrop hits her face.

"What the -" She starts, looking up at the dark night sky. The drops start coming faster, hitting harder as the rain begins to pour. All around you, people begin walking quickly to canopies, attempting to stay dry. "Come on," she says and grabs your hand.

The two of you make your way through the crowds of people, rain pouring down as she leads you out of the fairgrounds. The bright lights and loud music begin to fade as you run behind her, seeing her car just across the lot. Once you reach it, Natasha opens the passenger door for you.

The small act has you swooning as she stands there, waiting with a smile for you to get in. That even in the pouring rain, she was just the type of person to open the door for you. Instead of moving past her, you reach up to take her face in your hands, stepping on your tiptoes to kiss her.

The darkness is thick around the two of you, rain drowning out any nearby sounds. Natashas hands move from the door to wrap around your back, letting you down on your feet as she leans down to deepen the kiss. The cold rain is unforgiving as you melt into each other. A shiver runs through your body as her tongue slips in your mouth, a groan leaving your throat as the two halves spread to engulf your own. At your shiver, she pulls away breathlessly.

"We should get in," she utters against your lips. You nod feverishly.

"Backseat," you say, earning a groan from Natasha. She quickly pulls you away and opens the back door, letting you climb in. She follows behind, and as soon as the door is shut, you are climbing into her lap, lips colliding with hers again. The kiss is messy, tongues sloppily licking at eachothers mouths as you make out.

"Do you have any idea how crazy you drive me?" Natasha moans as your lips travel to her neck, her chest rising and falling rapidly with every nip. At her words, you grind your hips down in her lap, feeling her growing bulge. "F-fuck," she whimpers, bucking her hips up as you grind against her. "I need to be inside you, now," she groans. Her large hands move to your thighs, lifting your dress above your hips.

"Desperate, are we?" You purr, bitting down hard against her neck. She moans and nods, letting one of her hands move up to grip your jaw.

"Y/n," the soft look in her eyes is replaced with dark lust. "I need to fuck you. Now," she reiterates, grip on your jaw tight. Her thumb slips into your mouth, and as you suck on the digit she moans.

Your hands move to the bottom of her shirt, lifting the heavy, wet fabric over her head, along with her bra. Your fingers trace the tattoos that litter her collarbone, nails scratching lightly. You couldn't deny you were just as desperate for her. Natasha lets you up slightly to undo her jeans, pulling them down past her knees along with her underwear. She winces as you return to your previous position in her lap, hard cock rubbing against your still clothed pussy. She could feel you soaking through the thin material.

"God, I've missed this," you mumble as her lips reconnect with yours. You feel her fingers pull your underwear to the side, the tip of her cock rubbing against your aching cunt. Your hips hover over her length before slowly taking in a few inches.

The two of you moan loudly in the small car at the feeling, windows already fogged from your breathy groans.

"My pretty girl.. fuck," Natasha hisses as you lower yourself all the way down, feeling her thick cock stretching you out completely. "You were just made to take me," she moans again, hands resting on your hips. Your hands grip onto her shoulders, nails digging into the side of her neck. Her hands guide your hips to move, and you begin to ride her. Your eyes screw shut as she splits you in two, euphoria filling your veins with every movement of her own hips slapping up to meet your bounces.

"Look at you riding my cock, such a good girl for me," Natasha grunts as she watches your lips part, head thrown back in pleasure. "Taking every inch, fucking yourself on me," she pants out.

The coil in your stomach was building quickly, and as your legs began to grow weak, Natasha held tightly onto your hips, thrusting up into you harshly. Your mouth met hers again, and she swallowed your moans as you kissed her. "Baby I-I'm gonna cum," you moan out, whimpering as she shakes her head.

"Hold it. You cum with me or not at all," Natashas voice is stern, and your head falls forward into her neck. Your chests press together, and you can feel the piercings on her nipples rub against your dress as her arms wrap around your back to hold you in place.

"I wanna feel you soak my cock, god just listen to your pretty cunt make those noises," she moans. You can hear your wetness with every thrust, mixing the the rain hammering onto the roof of the car. The two of you are wet, sticky, and messy. Natashas primal urges to fuck you sending you closer and closer.

"Ohh, Nat, please I need to cum! Fill me up, baby," your moans turn higher pitched and she knows you won't last any longer, and neither will she.

"That's it, pretty girl.. cum for me. That's it, soak my cock, fuck, fuck!" Natashas mouth let's out a string of curses, fucking up into you mercilessly. The coil in your stomach snaps at her words, and you feel your orgasm hit hard. You moan her name loudly, body trembling as you feel her load fill you up, your hot walls swallowing every drop. Natashas hips finally slow to a stop, and you're left limp in her arms as the two of you pant against each others skin.

"So good, so good... my pretty girl..." Natasha whispers against your neck, holding you tightly. You stay like that for a while, head resting against her shoulder and just holding onto each other. The cool piercing on her lip brushes against your skin as she peppers kisses up to your face.

You lift your head to meet her soft green eyes with a smile, feeling her fingers brush your messy, damp hair out of your face. Before Natasha can even think to say it, you open your mouth.

"Hi," you giggle, earning a breathy laugh from the red head.

"Hi," she gives you a toothy grin and kisses your head.

****

The sunlight creeps through the windows, warming your skin. It was late in the morning, when you habitually reached out to grab your phone. Your heavy eyes barely peeking open as you check the screen. For a moment, in your sleepy morning haze, you looked for a 'good morning' text, but saw none.

It was then a pair of inked arms wrap around you from behind, and you smile to yourself, feeling Natashas body wrap around you protectively.

"Good morning," she mumbles tiredly against you, breath fanning the back of your neck. You chuckle and let yourself melt back into her hold, hands holding onto her arms as you drift back to sleep.

[bucksangel]

sugar and cream

pairing: alpha!steve x artist!omega!reader x alpha!bucky (poly) - omegaverse!au pt. 4

word count: 10.6k (i’m sorry😭)

summary: The second thing you notice is the bench seat by the living room window having been cleared off, leaving only a few pillows and a variety of Bucky and Steve's clothes. You're drawn to it like a moth to a flame, the potent scent of your Alphas clinging to their shirts pulling you in until you can reach out and run your fingers over the red Henley on top. "We, um - We thought you could have a nest... here."

or - you finally mate with your Alphas.

warnings: 18+ ONLY!!! the amount of fluff in here is unbearable, this is also very smutty, threesome (mmf), knotting, fingering (f receiving), oral sex (f receiving and also kinda m receiving), cum swallowing, praise kink galore, consent is sexy, cockwarming, mentions of bonding, mentions of m/m sex, dirty talk, omegaverse, omega is shy and inexperienced, stucky are extremely careful and loving, a slight amount of angst (bucky is insecure about his arm/scars), basically everyone is nervous, switching povs

a/n: part 4 is finally here!!! i want to continue this au so if anyone has any suggestions as to what to write then lmk!! beta’d by the ever lovely @perdidosbucky-yyo and @fandoms-writings <3 and, as always, this is dedicated to my heart and soul: @buckysbarne

milk and honey masterlist | main masterlist | tip jar | ao3

After days of not seeing your Alphas or having much contact with them, it sends a rush of adrenaline straight to your veins when Bucky texts you that they've finally made it home. Over the few months Bucky and Steve have been courting you, they've only gone on a handful of missions, and most only lasted a day or so with only one of them being gone, so you always had one of your Alphas by your side.

This is the first time they've both been gone for almost four days, and while that isn't that long in the grand scheme of things, you've been anxiously waiting for any communication from them that they're safe. And now that you know they are, you can't remember ever being so excited for something. You want to see them, to check them over and make sure their bruises and cuts are taken care of - even though you know they've already gone to the medical wing of the Tower to get everything taken care of.

It's also extremely nerve wracking because tonight is the night. The night you'll finally mate with Bucky and Steve and show them how much you love them with your body and soul. You haven't been with many Alphas, but you've watched a fair amount of porn with men that may or may not resemble yours in preparation for tonight. It was a little... embarrassing at first; you didn't even know what to search for. But the more videos you watch and accounts from other Omegas about their experiences with being with two Alphas you read, you'd like to think that you're ready.

Truthfully, you've been ready for tonight, even before they asked if you were. You've never wanted to give yourself over to anyone more than these men because you know they'll treat you right, they'll take care of you.

So, even though your skin is buzzing with anxiety, you don't dare and try to talk yourself out of grabbing your bags and jumping in your car. Your face almost hurts from how wide your smile is, the happiness at finally seeing your boys combined with tonight's events causing you to let out a little shriek. You can't contain your emotions right now, not that you want to, Steve and Bucky are very vocal about how they love that you've come out of your shell the longer you've been with them.

Just as you're parking, your phone dings with a text from your friend, Tori.

Have fun, be safe, and call me if you need me <3

Two seconds later, another text comes through.

And tell them that they better treat you right or else I'll come for them :)

Rolling your eyes, you quickly type back a response.

Thank you, babe. I'll let them know and call you if I need anything, ily <3

You don't bother waiting for a response before you grab your bags from the passenger seat and climb out of the car. You suppose you should feel anxious walking up their porch, but any and all worries immediately dissipate as soon as you reach the front door, to which it promptly swings open. Bucky is standing there, a wide smile stretched across his face, and a flush on his cheeks.

"Honey," He says, though it's more of a breathy whisper. His eyes sparkle, and you can't stop yourself from ducking your head and nervously giggling, making sure to hold your bag tight so as not to drop it. "Here, let me take that."

You hand him your overnight bags, to which he takes them in one hand and grabs your hand with his other to guide you into the house. It's decorated a little differently than how it looked when you were last here. The first thing you notice is the new large fluffy blanket folded and thrown over the back of the couch, enticing you to collapse onto it and wrap yourself in the fabric.

The second thing you notice is the bench seat by the living room window having been cleared off, leaving only a few pillows and a variety of Bucky and Steve's clothes. You're drawn to it like a moth to a flame, the potent scent of your Alphas clinging to their shirts pulling you in until you can reach out and run your fingers over the red Henley on top.

"We, um - We thought you could have a nest... here." Bucky's nervous voice makes you turn your head to look at him. Steve has come to stand beside him, lacing his fingers through his mates', and smiles at you with such fondness that it makes you want to drag them to their room right then.

-

"We thought you could have a nest... here." Saying it out loud is a little scary, but Bucky and Steve want you to know that you're welcome here, that they want you here any time you want to be here - which they can only hope is all the time.

And Bucky feels like he's floating on clouds when you smile at them, then take the Henley and bring it up to your nose. Your sweetened scent permeates the living room, and Bucky thinks he can make out the hint of a grin behind his shirt.

"Thank you, Alphas," You say when you lay the shirt back down, and Bucky is suddenly pulled back down to earth the closer you walk toward them, placing one of your hands on his cheek and grabbing Steve's hand with your other. "I - I'd love that."

If it weren't for the flush on your cheeks and the sparkle in your eyes, Bucky would've thought your micro stutter meant the opposite of what you said. But, as it is, he can't find it in himself to doubt you when you step up onto your tiptoes and place a lingering and loving kiss on his lips. And, after days of not seeing you, Bucky feels like he can finally relax and let out a big sigh of relief at knowing that he's surrounded by both of his loves.

Bucky's been on edge for the entire mission - not like Steve fared much better; they were both worried about not being able to keep contact with you. They absolutely know you can take care of yourself, but after months of doting on you and having you love them in return, they got used to it. Even if you didn't see each other every day, they never went long without texting or calling you, so it made both his and Steve's skin crawl at the circumstances.

But now they're back, and both men know that you are what makes their small brownstone a home, which is why they were even more excited to return.

Your kiss grounds him, the glide of your lips against his causing him to sigh into your mouth, and he can't stop himself from licking and then nipping at your bottom lip, desperate to hear that little squeak you let you whenever they give you things or do something that you like.

You'd all kissed before, including a few heavy petting sessions, but nothing further. They respect your boundaries and comfortability, and they'd hate themselves if they were the ones to hurt you like that. But, at their core, they're Alphas, and neither man can deny the rush of adrenaline whenever they're able to bring you even the smallest amount of pleasure.

The kiss comes to an end far too soon for Bucky's liking, but there's something inside him that loves seeing you and Steve together, so he pulls back, trying desperately to not feel bad when you whine and chase his lips.

"Why don't you give ol' Stevie a kiss too," Bucky murmurs against your mouth, smiling slightly when you suck in a breath and nod, your eyes glazing over a little. The look is mesmerizing, and he's anxious to see just how sweet you'll be for them.

When Bucky looks over to his Alpha, he sees the poorly disguised eagerness written all over his face, his puppy dog eyes shining. The brunette cups the back of your head, then disentangles his hand from Steve's so he can do the same to him, then guides your heads closer to each other until your lips are touching.

The kiss is easy and light, a few simple pecks, until they're both surprised by your boldness when you press your body into his and angle your head so that Steve is able to kiss you properly. He can see a peek of tongue slowly prompting you to open your mouth, then licking into it.

And Bucky can tell neither of you know, but your combined scents of arousal are emanating throughout the room and probably filling the entire house. He can feel his cock filling up in his jeans, twitching to life the longer the show goes on until he can't ignore it anymore, having to secretly reach down and grab his crotch to relieve the ache. Even without your mixed scents, he knows both of you are feeling it too by the little whines and gasps.

They'd planned on taking time to settle you into their house, take you on a tour of the rooms you hadn't seen before, maybe let you set up your nest by the window. But he doesn't want to wait; he's too nervous in the best way possible to worship you.

So, he saddles up behind you, wrapping one arm around your waist and resting it on your stomach, then places his other hand on Steve's waist. His movements knock both of you out of your trance, both of you pulling back with gasps and reddened lips, a bright blush covering Steve's cheeks.

"Sorry," Steve says breathlessly, chuckling a little when he realizes he got a little lost in the kiss.

"Don't be, Alpha," Bucky responds, leaning over your shoulder to peck Steve's lips. You whine at the sight, subconsciously squirming between their bodies.

"Alphas." Both Alphas groan, looking down at you with hooded eyes. "I - I'm..."

"Yes?" Steve asks when you don't continue, smiling when you nervously chuckle.

"I'm ready."

-

"I'm ready." You mean it with everything you have; you're ready to make love with them, to join your bodies, and show them that you trust them, that you love them.

Steve curses softly, gripping your hips as though he's restraining himself from throwing you over his shoulder. He doesn't; he actually puts one arm around your waist and loops his other arm under your knees and swiftly picks you up, carrying you bridal-style and smirking when you squeak.

No one says anything while you all head toward their room, a place you've never been. It makes you nervous, but you know without a doubt that you want this, you want to push through those nerves because you're even more anxious to really be with them.

Steve sets you down on your feet when they reach the end of their bed, letting you get a good look at how they live. Their room is spacious; a large bed with multiple pillows, a window with another bench seat, and a bookshelf that you just know is filled with Bucky's fantasy novels. You're smiling as you turn to look at everything, but your smile grows when you see more of their clothes on the lounge chair in the corner.

"We figured you could make a nest in our bed," Steve says nervously, and even without looking at him, you know he's shuffling in place, aching to reach out for you. "We want you to be comfortable here."

You can't seem to find any words to describe how happy you are right now, joy filling your body when you think about being surrounded by not only their scent, but their bodies too. It takes no time at all to walk over to the chair and look over the clothes, noticing shirts and sweaters and even a few boxers, causing heat to rise through your body and up to your face.

You don't even need to think about it, grabbing everything in the pile and carrying them over to the bed. The smile on your face is prominent with each article of clothing you place over the plush sheets, forming a semi-circle and fluffing it up until you're satisfied. Looking back to your Alphas, your eyes shine with a need to be praised, to be told that you did a good job, and that your boys are proud of you for your arrangement.

They do so very quickly.

"It's beautiful, honey," Steve says, not taking his eyes off of you.

"It's perfect, Omega," Bucky says next, reaching out his hand and beckoning you forward.

You go easily, walking toward them until you're once again sandwiched between them.

"You're really ready?" Bucky asks, caressing your sides and carefully slipping one of his hands under your shirt.

"Y-Yes." God, you're more than ready. But knowing that you're not as experienced as they are makes you question how tonight is going to go. However, they've always been careful with you, so you're at least comfortable knowing that they won't hurt you.

"We're going to go slow, okay?" Bucky asks, and you let out a small sigh of relief you didn't know you were holding.

"If we do anything you don't like, please tell us," Steve adds, cupping the back of your neck with a large hand. Guiding your head up to look at him, the seriousness in his gaze feels like the wind has been knocked out of you. The fact that they're so adamant about pleasuring you sends shivers down your spine.

"Yes, Alpha."

"We'll start with you telling us what you like," Bucky whispers in your ear, just loud enough for everyone to hear, but not so loud to disrupt the moment.

"Oh." Truthfully, you don't really know what you like. You haven't been with many Alphas, so you're not sure what you enjoy when having sex with one, but you have a general understanding as to what you like when you spend some time with yourself. "Well, I - uh. I don't really know, I haven't... been with that many people, so I don't really know. But, I... I like kissing. And I like touching."

"God, you're sweet," Bucky murmurs, kissing your cheek.

-

"God, you're sweet."

It's true, oh Lord, is it true. When Steve leans down to kiss you, he already knows what he wants to do. And since he and Bucky have talked about this in length, he knows Bucky is on the same page. They both know you're fairly inexperienced, so they figured you may not know exactly what you prefer with other people, but they both know they'll spend all night - hell, all weekend, exploring your body and getting to find out what makes you moan before they even think about their own pleasure.

"How about," Steve cut himself off with a groan poorly disguised as a clear of the throat. "How about we get naked first and get in bed. Is that okay?"

"Yes," You say quickly, leaning up and kissing Steve again. "I - I want that."

"Good," Bucky says, kissing the back of your neck and toying with the hem of your shirt. "We're going to undress you first."

Steve and Bucky talked about it, and came to a mutual decision to direct you through the night's events, telling you what they're going to do so they don't scare you. It also helps them and their primal Alpha urges to take care of you, to settle them into the mindset of giving you as much euphoria as they can without getting lost in their own heads.

Bucky and Steve kiss all over your face and neck, soft presses of lips against smooth skin, occasionally nipping and biting and licking. They pointedly ignore your scent gland, wanting to not only tease you a little, but also not put pressure on you with the idea of their marks. While they love to think about you being theirs forever, they want you to make the decision on if and when it will happen.

They're slow and methodical in taking off your shirt, Bucky working on your pants while Steve's brain short circuits at the sight of your covered breasts rising and falling rapidly with each passing second that their hands caress your body. When his Alpha chuckles, he's knocked out of his trance, kneeling down and steadying your legs to help you step out of your jeans.

Then, you're standing in their room covered only by your bra and underwear. Steve can smell your arousal even more here, the scent of your wetness making his head spin and lean into it. He stops himself before he gets too close, though, not wanting to move too fast. Looking up at you, he runs his hands up and down your thighs, very much enjoying the sight of his mate's hands exploring your torso, stopping to cup your clothed breast.

"Oh!" Your back arches, pressing into Bucky's touch. Steve sees his boyfriend smile against your neck, takes great joy in your little whines, and the way your hips buck up when Steve tugs at the band of your panties.

"Can we take these off, honey?"

"Please." Your begging causes the base of Steve's cock to throb, his knot already pleading to lock inside you.

You stand in place as Bucky works to remove your bra while Steve drags your underwear down your legs, and when he removes them entirely, he's captivated by the sight of how wet and ruined they are. The need to smell them is strong, but he manages to push aside the urge so that he can place his hands on your waist and look up at your face. Your pleasure is evident, but so is your hesitance.

Steve knows it probably shouldn't, but your inexperience turns him on even more than you already do, and he's determined to get you through it to the other side.

"Do you want to lay down, Omega?" Bucky asks, running his hands up and down your arms in a soothing manner.

"O-Okay." Your voice is breathy, already melting into their arms despite the lingering anxiety.

Steve stands, and both men guide you to the bed, a low growl bubbling up in Bucky's throat when you lay down, your legs out straight and spread slightly. They can both hear how fast your heart is racing, they both see the rapid rising and falling of your chest, and they can both smell how absolutely soaked you are.

"She's so beautiful, isn't she Stevie?" Bucky's voice is breathless, like he can't believe his luck at seeing you like this. Steve understands, because he's feeling quite the same. He's so eager to be with you but even more resolved to make this as pleasurable for you as possible, so slow and steady it is.

"She really is, Buck." They're about to crawl onto the bed, but stop when you whine softly and squirm.

"What's wrong, Omega?" Steve's brow furrows, looking over at his Alpha, who appears to be equally concerned.

"Can... Um. Can I... see you too?" Your voice is so small, so timid. The way you fiddle with one of their shirts by your head lets Steve know you probably want to reach out for them, and Steve would never deny you anything you ask for.

"Of course," Steve says, nodding. When he takes off his shirt, he sees your eyes widen, and smiles to himself when you shut your legs together tightly. The hunger in your eyes is evident, but there's also nervousness. "How about we still keep our boxers on for now, and we can finish getting undressed later?"

"O-Okay." Steve smiles at your response, and then looks over to his mate who - oh. Fear is etched across his face, and it suddenly clicks in Steve's brain.

Bucky's arm. While the scars have never deterred Steve from loving and worshiping Bucky the way he deserves, he knows his Alpha is still self conscious about it around other people. He's grown more confident with his body as time passes, but Steve knows Bucky is terrified of you seeing the marred skin on his shoulder.

"Alpha?" Your soft voice says, and you slowly sit up and look at Bucky expectantly.

-

"Alpha?"

Bucky kind of wants to vomit. He's been so excited for tonight, so eager to finally show you how much love they can give you, that he completely forgot that he would have to be naked too. He knows Steve doesn't mind his arm or scars, has told and shown him countless times that he's loved and desired, but it's different with you.

After all Bucky has been through, he never thought he'd get so lucky as to reunite with Steve, to be with him and love him openly in a way he never allowed himself to dream of back in the forties when being gay was a death sentence and two Alpha's mating was so unheard of it that it was laughable. And now that he can, he feels like he can truly be himself, like he can be, dare he say it, happy.

And then you came along. You, with your sweet voice that invades his dreams and makes him wake up aching to call you. You, with your tender touch that feels like a shot of dopamine straight into his veins any time your fingers so much as brush his arm. You, with your kind heart that has shown him so much love and patience, one would think you were a saint.

You've allowed him to explore parts of himself that he never knew existed; you've shown him how gentle he can be, that he's more than what he's made himself out to be. So, knowing all of this about you, Bucky doesn't think it should be so scary to reveal his torso to you. He knows that even if you did think the scars were ugly, you wouldn't visibly react.

But that's the thing. What if you do think his scars are ugly? Tony gave him some fancy medical cream he can't remember the name of to help make them not so red and angry all the time, but it's still not pretty. And the last thing Bucky wants is for you to look at him and realize you're too good for an Alpha like him.

No. He thinks harshly, chewing on his bottom lip, heat rising to his face as he tries to calm his racing heart. She loves me. I am enough. I can do this.

"Bucky?" Your sweet voice travels up to his ears, forcing his gaze to meet yours. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, of - of course - yeah." He knows he's okay, he knows he's safe with you and Steve, but when he finally pulls his shirt over his head and drops it to the floor, he can't meet your eyes, too afraid of what he'll find if he does.

He hears the bed squeak when he doesn't move, and he's so focused on trying to breathe properly that he nearly jumps when he feels Steve's hand land on his flesh shoulder.

"Bucky," You call again, soft as ever, and he can see out of the corner of his eyes that you're now kneeling at the end of the bed, reaching out to touch his chest. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I can put my shirt on if you want," Is what he blurts out, rushed, trying to assure you that he'll do whatever he needs to make you comfortable.

"Why would I want that? I love looking at you." There's a pain in Bucky's heart because you sound genuinely hurt and confused, wondering why he would ever think such a thing. "You're beautiful, Alpha."

Bucky lets out a shaky breath, then, with no small amount of apprehension, turns to face you.

"It's just... I know you probably don't want to see my... my scars, and I know they're ugly, so it -" Bucky's cut off by your lips pressing against his, and he feels his body relax even more.

"Do you want to know what I think of your scars?" You ask when you pull back, and Bucky doesn't really know if he wants to or not. But there's no malice in your tone, no disgust in your eyes, only love. So, despite his better judgment, he nods slowly.

"I think they're a symbol of resolve. You've been through so much, far too much. And they might remind you of all that you were forced to do, but not for me. They're proof to me that you withheld their torment and came out on the other side. They're proof of how strong and capable you are. I don't care if they aren't aesthetically pleasing, they're apart of you, whether you like it or not. And I love you. All of you. And that includes your arm."

Bucky is so focused on you that he doesn't realize he's crying; the tears on his cheeks don't register in his mind because he's too captivated by the sight of your fingers delicately running along the biggest mark on his shoulder. Then, you're leaning forward, placing a few short and sweet kisses along the seam where metal meets flesh, and Bucky won't even deny that the whimper he lets out is downright pitiful. But he can't help it; he doesn't want to ever go without you and your compassion.

"I love you too," Bucky whispers, leaning into your touch. "You... You're sure you don't mind?"

"Baby," You murmur, cupping his cheek in one palm and holding onto his shoulder with the other. "If it would make you feel more comfortable to wear a shirt, then I won't force you not to wear one, but I want to see you, all of you. I don't care if you don't think you're perfect because you're perfect to me. Me and Stevie. You're perfect for us."

If Bucky believed in a God, he'd be thanking them right now, would be on his knees wondering what he ever did to deserve you, but is so grateful that he must have done something right because here you are, in all your glory. Naked and baring your heart and soul to them.

Bucky wants to ravage you. He wants to worship you.

He's going to.

With a resolute nod, he covers your hand - the one on his cheek - and moves it so he can kiss your palm, once, twice, then a final time before he looks over at Steve. His mate has tears in his own eyes, and he's honestly surprised Steve isn't bawling right now, always so emotional.

"Lay back, Omega." Bucky's voice is hoarse, thick with emotion and desire.

And, because you're so sweet, you lay back easily, wiggling until you're laying comfortably with your legs out and spread a little, and your arms resting on the pillow above you. The picture you paint is better than anything in the MoMA. He could write soliloquies about how beautiful you are when you look at him with half-lidded eyes and slightly kiss-swollen lips. You're completely relaxed, and Bucky takes a few seconds to breathe in your scent and cement in his brain that you want him.

"Okay," Bucky whispers, mostly to himself, and gathers the courage to unbutton his pants and pull down the zipper. Looking to you, he waits for your little nod before he actually tugs the garment down, and then turns his head to see Steve doing the same. They're both slow, not wanting to ruin the moment. They've got nowhere to be except here with you.

Once both Alphas' pants are discarded, Steve steps towards Bucky and gives him an encouraging kiss, letting him know that they're in this together. It gives Bucky the reassurance that Steve is on the same page as him, is with him 'til the end of the line.

When they break away, they share a knowing glance. This is a big step for not just you, but for them. They've been together their whole lives; they know each other intimately in ways no one else ever will, and so to allow someone else into their dynamic was a big adjustment.

It's one they're happy to make for you.

"Can we come into your nest, Omega?"

-

"Can we come into your nest, Omega?"

You're not sure why, but there's a pang in your chest at the question. This is their bed you're laying in, these are their clothes you're surrounded by, but to them, it's your nest. They've already given you so much without expecting or asking for anything in return, and now they're giving you this; a safe space outside of your apartment where no one can hurt you, where even they still ask for permission to enter.

"Yes." It's the fastest and easiest response you've ever given, and you can't stop the smile from etching across your face as they crawl up the bed so that they can both lay on either side of you, propping themselves up on an elbow so they can stare down at you.

Now you're really trapped between them, both Alphas' eyes roaming over your body as though they can't believe you're real. Despite the close quarters, your 'fight or flight' senses don't kick in; you know in your soul that you're protected. And that thought alone makes your inner Omega force a submissive whine slip out of your mouth.

"Can I touch you, honey?" Steve asks, letting his hand hover over your stomach as though he's aching to feel you but won't do so without your permission.

"Please, Alpha." You're not sure which of your Alphas produces the deep growl that echoes through the room; perhaps it's both of them; all you know is that as soon as Steve's hand makes contact with your skin, your body is lit aflame. He runs his fingers over to your side, gliding his palm up until he's just barely touching your breast.

Suddenly, Bucky has let his hand rest on your neck - not nearly enough to choke you, just to guide your attention to his.

"Can I kiss you?"

You're not at all embarrassed at the speed at which you surge forward to kiss Bucky; just a few touches and sweet words and you're already putty for them. This time, you can feel the groan vibrating through the Blonde Alpha's chest, and your hand instinctively searches for him, finding purchase by threading your fingers through his hair. You can feel his eyes never wavering from your face, and it makes you burn hotter, makes you squirm because you're not sure what to do about the almost unbearable ache between your legs.

The kiss starts out soft, merely a gentle glide of lips caressing each other. It isn't until one of Steve's massive hands fully encompasses one of your breasts that Bucky's tongue has the opportunity to slip into your mouth - dropped open due to a gasp.

Lips press against your neck, soft sighs mixed in with little nips as Steve breathes in your scent. You're pretty sure it's involuntary, but you feel the hard bulge in Steve's boxers grind against your leg a few times before he seems to come to his senses and stop his movements.

"Sorry, 'mega," Steve breathes out against your skin, tugging at your nipple at the same time Bucky moves his hand down to your stomach. They work in tandem to get you worked up, and you're sure both of them can smell how wet you are.

It's when Bucky's hand reaches the top of one of your thighs that you part your legs as wide as you can with both Alphas surrounding you.

"Can I touch your pussy?" Bucky asks, pulling back from your lips just enough to be heard. He's breathing hard, almost as though he is the one that's about to combust from pleasure.

"Y-Yes, Alpha." It's been so long since you've had someone else touch you like this, and despite being nervous, you want to push through it. You want to join your bodies with them, give them anything they desire.

And even though you're aching and desperate, Bucky doesn't move fast towards where you want him most. He takes his time trailing his fingers to the inside of your thigh, then grips it in his large palm and drapes your leg over his to open you up even further. The cold air hitting your exposed pussy sends shivers down your spine, and Steve covers your mouth with his own to swallow your high-pitched whine.

"Don't worry, honey," Bucky coos in your ear, nipping your lobe. "We'll take care of you."

Pulling away from Steve and looking over at your other Alpha, you smirk a little. "You better," you tease, reaching up and carding your fingers through his hair, relishing in the quiet groan he lets out. "Because Tori wanted me to tell you that she'll hurt you if you don't."

Both Alphas laugh, nodding along.

"Well, we'll reassure her later that we did everything we could to cherish you the way you deserve," Steve says, kissing your cheek. "Right now, though, we have a job to do."

"And that's to prove to you that we can give you everything you need and want," Bucky finishes for him, sliding his hand to cover your dripping core and smiling deviously when you moan and buck your hips up into it.

"I know you will," You say. And you mean it; you mean it with everything you have. You know in your heart and soul that only they can provide for you. Looking between your best guys, you give them the softest smile. "I know."

Both men curse under their breaths, and Bucky looks down at you with that look in his eyes he only gives you and Steve.

"Can I play with your clit?" His voice is gruff, and it's clear he's holding himself back from absolutely ravishing you. It sends a surge of love straight to your heart and causes more slick to pour out of your quivering hole.

"Please."

Bucky nods, and Steve leans down to encompass your nipple, the one that he's not tugging at while your other Alpha taps your clit a few times. He circles it a few times, pressing down and smirking when you once again push your hips up.

"You're so beautiful like this, do you know that?"

It's an automatic reaction to shake your head in denial of his comment. You want to believe that it's true so badly, but sometimes you still have trouble accepting their compliments. It just doesn't seem real that these two Gods see you as beautiful as they say you are, but part of you likes to think that just makes their opinions that much more real. If these gorgeous Alphas think your appearance captivates them just as much as your heart, then you're hoping you're going to believe them one day.

"You are," Steve growls against your skin, and the sound reverberates through your chest. The sternness in his tone makes you whine, but also causes tears to prick your eyes.

"Say it," Bucky demands, rolling your clit between his fingers. "Tell us what Stevie and I already know." When you don't say anything, he continues. "Tell us you're beautiful; tell us that we're lucky to have you, and I'll slip my finger in that cute little hole."

You want his finger so bad, you want it to fill you completely and get you ready for them, but your emotions get caught in your throat. It's so difficult to say what they want you to say, but when Steve lets his teeth graze your breast and Bucky circles your hole teasingly, you know you'll say or do anything they ask of you as long as they continue to play with your body like this.

"I..." Bucky raises his eyebrow, then softens his expression, and leans down to kiss your forehead. With a deep breath, you look up at him. "I'm beautiful."

"And?" Steve says, releasing your breast and causing you to tremble when the cold air hits your exposed and wet nipple.

"You - You're... You're lucky to - to have me."

"Damn right we are," Both of your men say at the same time, and you'd laugh at their synchronicity if it weren't for Bucky's finger pressing against your opening.

You're wet enough that it doesn't feel that uncomfortable when the very tip of his finger dips in, but your body involuntarily tenses when he tries pushing in deeper.

"It's okay, honey," Bucky coos, and Steve cups your cheek to guide your attention to him.

"Just relax, Omega," He says, kissing your lips briefly. "It's okay, we won't do anything you don't want."

"But..." You trail off, heat creeping up to your face. "I - I really do want it. Just... Just go slow, okay?"

"Of course," Bucky says, Steve nodding in agreement, and the hunger in his eyes doesn't put you off. It actually emboldens you and further cements in your brain that they crave you the way they claim to. "We'll go as slow as you want, sweet girl. We don't have anywhere to be except right here with you."

"We won't even think about our own pleasure until you're completely satisfied," Steve adds, and that alone makes you want to cry.

How did you get so lucky?

"We told you, we are the lucky ones." Bucky's comment makes the heat in your cheeks flare up because you realize you said that out loud.

"So am I, though - oh!" You get cut off when Bucky manages to push his finger in even more until it's halfway inside. "I - I love you, and you love me, and it just - oh God."

Steve doesn't let you finish your sentence because he quickly pecks your lips, and you let his tongue invade your mouth when it asks for entrance by running along your bottom lip.

"We're supposed to praising you, Omega," You hear Bucky say, wiggling the finger inside you. You can't see him, but you're sure he's staring down at your entrance, no doubt aching to feel you fluttering around his cock.

The thought makes you clench down onto his finger, but then immediately relax your body to allow him to push all the way in. It stings, and you kind of wish you prepped yourself a little before coming over, but another part of you loves that they're the ones doing it, that they're more than willing to do the work.

Bucky wiggles his finger again, letting you get used to the feeling. Other than that, he doesn't move his hand, not until you break your kiss with Steve and nod at him.

"You - You can move."

He's slow as he pulls his hand back, though he doesn't allow himself to fully pull out. He gives you time to take a few deep breaths, then pushes back in, repeating the motion leisurely for a while until you're moaning and nodding again.

"Can you... give me another?" His fingers are big, one of them being thicker than two of your own, so you're sure it's going to be a little painful, but you're ready for it. Ready for them.

"Of course, honey." This time, he does pull out of your hole, tracing two of them around your entrance and smiling when you whine pathetically. "Just breathe, okay?"

"Yes, Alpha."

-

"Yes, Alpha."

Bucky wants to combust, is going to implode with how much love he has for you. When you call him 'Alpha', it does things to him. It sends the primal part of his brain into overdrive, making him want to wrap you in his arms and give you the world.

Your body melts into the bed, and he manages to push two thick fingers into your core, stopping as soon as you hiss softly.

"It's okay, honey," Steve whispers into your ear, running his own hand down until he can press down against your clit. "His fingers are big, aren't they?"

"Uh huh," You mumble, wiggling your hips and taking steadying breaths. "So big."

Now, Steve knows from personal experience how big Bucky is, his cock and fingers included. And he knows that Steve can take it - oh boy can he take it, but Bucky knows he needs to be careful with you, no matter how strong his urge to simply take you is.

Steve continues to rub and play with your clit, allowing you to relax your core until Bucky can slip his fingers in further. It takes a little longer to fit both of them fully inside you, having to spread his fingers and go slow as he opens you up so that he's able to press in all the way. The fluttering of your hole makes his cock throb, eager to feel it around his cock, but wants to take his time so that you can actually enjoy it.

"Alright, Omega," Bucky breathes out, having to close his eyes and will himself to pull his fingers out. "Can you take another?"

"Yes!" Your enthusiastic consent forces a rumble from his chest, making that Alpha growl that he knows you like.

"Okay, don't fret, honey," Bucky coos, leaning down and giving you a nearly filthy kiss before pulling back. "Now, this may hurt. Just remember to breathe and relax."

He waits for you to nod before he presses the tips of three fingers against your hole. He goes even slower when opening you up this time, and he doesn't mind that it takes longer to be able to finger you properly. It seems like it takes a lifetime for him to be able to move faster, but he doesn't mind, not in the slightest. He's willing to age twenty years until you're truly ready. The glazed over look in your eyes makes him want to cry with how absolutely sweet you are, your scent of arousal filling his nostrils as he inhales deeply.

"Can I ask you something?" Bucky asks, and he wasn't planning on it, but when he pulls his hand away and looks at his glistening fingers, he knows he needs to taste you.

"What is it?"

"Have you ever had your pretty pussy eaten out?"

“Oh.” Your eyes go wide and your hips involuntarily wiggle. “Um, no - no one’s ever… done that.”

“Can I be your first?” Bucky is practically salivating at the thought of burying his face between your legs, and he can feel his knot throb as he imagines the moans you’ll make.

“Oh, oh - um. Yes, you can... do that.” You sound caught off guard, and for a moment Bucky thinks you might be complying simply because he asked, but then you thrust your hips upwards and whine  “Please.”

Bucky can’t help the cheshire-like grin that envelops itself across his face, and he quickly nods, then looks at Steve.

“How about you get behind her and sit her on your lap; it’ll be easier that way.”

His mate nods eagerly, and they both look to you for your consent, which you give them with a nod of your own. They both lean back; Bucky helping you sit up so that Steve can shuffle to sit behind you. Bucky lets you scoot back so you can settle against Steve’s chest, and Bucky just can’t stop himself from staring at you both for a few moments. You’re just so beautiful, and seeing Steve’s hands holding your waist makes him desperate to watch you two make love.

But first, he has a job to do.

Bucky maneuvers his body so he can lay on his stomach between your legs, and he takes one of your calves in his hands. Slowly, he trails kisses from your ankle up to the inside of your thigh, then lifts it so he can lay it over Steve’s leg. He does the same with your other leg, though this time he gives you a few nibbles, which he licks after to soothe the mild sting.

Once both of your legs are spread, your glistening pussy is on full display, and Bucky doesn’t even want to stop the groan he lets out, he needs to let you know that he’s enjoying this almost as much as you are.

Leaning forward, he inhales your scent where it’s strongest, and he moans even louder, unable not to spread your lower lips to fully view your most intimate parts. Looking up at you, he gives you a gentle smile, then delicately kisses your clit.

“If you want me to stop, just let me know.” At your nod, and a smile of your own, he dives in further, flicking the tip of his tongue over your clit several times and relishing in your shocked gasp.

Flattening his tongue, he licks a long stripe from your leaking hole back up to your clit, then wraps his lips around it and suckles, giving you time to adjust to the feeling. But soon enough, his hunger overtakes him, and he dips his tongue into your loosened hole, sticking it in as far as he can so he can drink down your essence. He keeps his eyes on your euphoric expressions, watching carefully to find out which of his actions makes you tremble the most. And you seem to be more than okay with what he’s doing, especially when he licks back up to your clit and teases your entrance with the tips of two fingers.

“Oh! Alpha, yes!”

Your begging sends shivers down Bucky’s spine, and he groans into your pussy, taking mercy on you and fitting them inside you. He continues to lick and suck your clit while simultaneously picking up the speed at which he fingers you, though he’s careful not to overwhelm you. He watches as Steve covers one of your hands with his own and threads your fingers together, then guides your other hand to grip Bucky’s hair.

“Does she taste as good as we thought?” Steve asks, his voice gruff.

“So much better,” Bucky says, leaning back just enough to be heard. His admission must have done something to you because you thrust your hips against his face and whine, high-pitched and loud.

Bucky might actually die; he feels as though he is dead, has passed over into the afterlife, and is now on his way to heaven. The way you grind your hips against his face makes his cock throb, makes him want to hump against the bed to relieve the ache - he won't, though, because he knows he'll cum too soon if he does.

“Buck,” Steve says some time later, out of breath as though he was the one who couldn’t breathe because he was devouring you.

“What, punk?” Bucky asks, pulling away and practically glaring at him, annoyed that he was stopped when you were on your way to release.

“Are you gonna let me have a taste too?”

“So needy,” He chuckles, the corner of his mouth ticking up in a smirk at the same time he rolls his eyes.

Bucky surges up, ignoring your whine as he leans over your body so he can immediately lick into Steve’s mouth. Your slick covers Bucky’s chin, and once your taste is almost gone from his mouth, Steve starts cleaning his Alpha’s face with his tongue, groaning deeply.

“You were right, jerk,” Steve says when he’s done, then turns to find you’ve been watching them. He pecks your lips, then smirks at you. “You’re delicious.”

“Alphas, please!”

“Please what, honey?” Bucky teases, taking your hand out of his hair and kissing your palm. “What do you want?”

“I…” You pause, chewing on your lip in a nervous gesture. “I want you… inside me.”

Both Alphas curse, and the men share a look before turning back to you.

“Both of us won’t fuck you tonight,” Bucky starts, cutting off your disappointed whine with a brief kiss. “We don’t want to overwhelm you. So, we’ll let you choose.”

“Oh.” You look conflicted, eyes flicking between both men as though it’s an impossible choice to make. And after a while, Steve kisses your temple, rubbing your sides.

“How about Bucky takes you first? And then we can work up to both of us later.” Steve’s offer seems to please you, and you turn to look at him over his shoulder.

“Are you sure, Stevie?”

“I’m sure,” Steve assures, bringing up your joined hands and kissing your knuckles. “As a matter of fact, I want to watch you two. I can take care of myself, okay?”

“O-Okay.”

“Okay, honey. We’re going to take off our boxers now,” Bucky says, and both of them carefully extract themselves from your body so they can stand next to the bed. Both of them take a deep breath, keeping their eyes on you while they peel off their underwear and let them fall to the floor.

“That’s not going to fit.” Your blunt statement makes them both laugh a little, and Bucky shakes his head.

“We’ll make it fit, Omega. But…” Bucky trails off, glancing at Steve and seeing his reassuring smile. “How about you just sit on it for a little bit? It will get you used to the feeling.”

You squirm in place, your hands twisting in the bed sheets you're laying on as you contemplate the offer. Finally, you nod, sitting up and shuffling around so Bucky can sit on the bed with his back leaning against the head board. They both help you straddle Bucky's lap, kneeling above him as he holds your hips. He hisses when Steve grabs the base of his sensitive cock, relishing in the grip as his mate positions the tip at your entrance.

"Are you ready, honey?" Bucky asks, looking up at you. He can hear how fast your heart is beating, can practically feel you vibrating in place with anxiety. He's not sure if it's good or bad, and you have a hesitant look on your face, but you nod anyway, leaning down to quickly kiss him.

"Yeah, just..." You trail off, chewing on your lower lip briefly. "Go slow?"

"Of course, honey," Bucky assures, squeezing your sides affectionately.

"We've got all night," Steve adds, pressing a kiss to your temple. "If you want to stop or take a break, just let us know. There's no need to rush, okay? We'll take this at your pace."

"Okay," You say, taking a deep breath. "I trust you both."

You have no idea what that simple sentence does to Bucky. You trust him? Him? Bucky Barnes? The Winter Soldier? He understands Steve; he's Captain Fucking America; of course, he can be trusted to protect you. But sometimes it's still wild to Bucky that you trust him to do that as well.

It's something he'll never take for granted.

-

"I trust you both."

You mean it when you say it. You trust your Alphas with your life, taking solace in the fact that they'll care for and covet you, so you're not worried about that. It's just... You've never felt like this towards anyone; you don't think you'll ever feel so much love and adoration for another man, not that you want to. You fully intend on bonding with them and marrying them, creating a future together filled with happiness and joy. In fact, you're not actually sure what you'd do if you didn't spend the rest of your life with them.

You refuse to find out.

They're careful when helping you sit, Steve keeping his hold on Bucky's knot while snaking his other hand down your front to your pussy. Spreading your lower lips, you shiver at the touch, anticipation building in your core and heart as they remind you to take deep breaths.

It's been a long, long time since you've had sex, so the initial sting isn't surprising. What is surprising, however, is how quickly the pain dulls, fading away to pleasure. Steve's finger lightly toying with your clit also helps, forcing more slick to drip from your hole and practically soak Bucky's cock. Despite feeling like he's already deep in your stomach, you look down and find that he's only about halfway inside you, and you continue taking deep breaths.

It takes a few minutes for you to feel ready enough to sit down all the way; loud moans and whines fill the room. It's overwhelming in the best possible way - Bucky rubbing your waist to soothe you while Steve continues flicking your clit.

"Fuck." Even you are shocked at your exclamation, you rarely curse; it's just not in your nature. But it's the only thing that comes to mind, and your internal filter is practically nonexistent at this point. Your head is filled with thoughts of how much you love your Alphas, how much you crave them, and how you know you're immediately addicted to his cock. You won't take Steve tonight, but you're sure you'll become obsessed with his too.

It's just too good. Feeling Bucky's cock pulsing in your pussy sends shivers down your spine, electricity thrumming throughout your body and causing fuzziness in your mind.

"Are you okay?" Steve asks, continuing to rub your nub and moving his hand from Bucky's cock to your breast, softly tugging and tweaking your nipple.

"Better," You say breathlessly, turning your head to look at him. "So much better than okay."

"Good. That's good, Omega," Bucky grits out, and you will applaud him later for his strength and willpower to not immediately fuck you. You know you're tight, squeezing his member as though you never want to let him leave your body - which, to be fair, you don't. You'd live happily for the rest of your life like this, surrounding and filled with your best guys.

"Are you okay, Buck?" Steve teases, and you smile a little at the smirk he gives the other man. "How does she feel? Tell me." The huskiness in Steve's voice gives away his eagerness, and it leaves you feeling disappointed that you won't take him tonight while also anticipating for when you finally do.

"Like fucking heaven." Bucky tightly shuts his eyes, breathing steadily through the intense waves of pleasure. "Our Omega is so tight, so fucking wet. Don't ever want to leave her pretty pussy."

The way they talk about you like you're not even here gets you even more soaked, unable to stop the pathetic whimper that escapes your lips. Nor are you able to stop yourself from wiggling in place, heat flooding your veins as Bucky's cock shifts inside you.

"He's so greedy, isn't he, honey?" Steve asks you playfully, chuckling to himself when you nod, clearly loving your dazed state. "Not that I blame him. We've both dreamt about you, how perfect you'd be for us. We'd wake up hard as hell, desperate to call you so we can get off to your voice. We didn't know how you would feel about that, though, so we'd take care of ourselves. But you're what we think about when we have sex; we moan your name, imagining you here with us so we can love on you too, give you everything you need."

Steve's endless praise lights you on fire, your hind brain going feral over how soft his tone yet how filthy the words he's spewing is.

"I -" Pausing, you squirm again, moaning at the jolt of pleasure. "I think about you too. When... When I t-touch myself." The admission doesn't scare you like you thought it would; you're too in love with them to be embarrassed about being so vulnerable.

But your admission makes Bucky's hips stutter upwards, causing you to bounce slightly. Everyone moans, and you feel Steve's painfully hard erection rut against your backside, and you take great pride in knowing that they're clearly pleased.

"God, you're just perfect, aren't you?" Bucky sounds out of breath, like he's just ran a marathon and hasn't recovered yet. He raises his eyebrows when you start to shake your head, taking you by surprise when he lightly pinches your side - not nearly enough to hurt, just acting as a warning.

"Say it, Omega," Steve urges, rubbing your clit a little faster. "Tell us that you're perfect, and then we'll let you ride Buck like I know you're desperate to."

"I'm... perfect." You don't really believe it, but you know you'll say just about anything in order to get what you want. And, judging by the looks on both of their faces, they don't believe that you mean it either.

"One day you'll see yourself how we do; the sweet, perfect Omega that you are. And we'll be right here when you do."

Steve's words make you want to cry; they bring tears to your eyes and a surge of love through your heart. How did you get so lucky?

You don't get much time to dwell on that because Steve squeezes your breast tighter at the same time that Bucky grips your hips and guides them to grind down on his lap. More moans emanate through the air, focusing on how good it feels to be loved by these perfect Alphas, how good you feel being filled to the brim with cock.

Before long, Bucky takes your hands and places them on his shoulders, his breath hitching when you delicately rub your thumb along the scars. You know he can't feel much of it, but you hope he understands the gesture when you lean down to kiss the marks. It doesn't take but a few minutes of gyrating until you voluntarily raise up a few inches, then sink down in one fluid motion, squeezing your eyes shut because you can feel that you're about to cum but you're pleading with your body not to let you, not yet. You don't want this to end just yet.

You lift up again, then sit down with a little more force, relishing in your Alphas' groans. You feel powerful like this, taking what you want with more and more determination until you position your lower half in such a way that the tip of Bucky's cock presses into that special spot deep inside your core.

"Alpha!"

"Is that it, Omega?" Bucky asks through a clenched jaw, his pupils blown wide as he stares down at where your bodies meet, entranced by the sight of his soaked cock. "Did I hit your spot? You feelin' good?"

"So - oh!" You can't stop riding him even when the burn in your hips increases, and you know you'll be sore tomorrow, but you couldn't care less right now. All you care about is getting off and making your guys feel as good as you do. "I'm gonna cum!"

"Do it, 'Mega," Steve says, rubbing your clit furiously, smirking into your neck when he ducks his head and licks and sucks the skin around your scent gland. "Cum for us, show us how beautiful you are when you fall apart. Show us how sweet you are for us."

You can tell Bucky is close too based on the rapidity of his chest rising and falling, the flush covering his body, the tensing of his abs. But you can also tell that he's holding back until you break first, and your inner Omega preens at the display of restraint, knowing that he's strong enough to please you first before he allows himself his own release.

"Cum."

You're not sure who ordered it, but you don't really care. Your body tensing and your pussy clamping down on Bucky's knot as it locks inside you, waves of ecstasy washing over you until tears start streaming down your face. It seems like forever but also no time at all before you slump forward into Bucky's chest, aftershocks of your orgasm causing you to quake when you feel his own cum flood your hole, getting locked in by his fully blown knot.

You're still whimpering and crying into Bucky's chest as you come down from your high; too many positive emotions swirling in your body and mind that it can't help but pour out of you.

"Honey?" Someone asks, clearly concerned, and you shake your head.

"I - I'm okay," You assure them, focusing on the hands caressing your body. "I just... I just love you both so, so much."

"We love you too, Omega." You recognize the voice as Bucky's, your cries dwindling into sniffles until you try to sit up, but fall forward almost immediately due to how weak you feel.

"It's okay, just stay like that, honey," Steve says gently, moving from behind you to kneel at your side and rub your back. "Rest."

"But..." Breathing deeply, you feel a sense of guilt when you look down and see that Steve is still hard. You want him to get off too, eager to see him lose himself, wanting so badly to touch him and give him his own orgasm. "You didn't..."

"Oh, honey," Steve coos, smiling at you sweetly when you trail off and don't continue. "You're worried because I didn't cum?"

Shyly nodding your head, you force yourself to maintain eye contact, slowly reaching out for him.

"Can - Can I... I wanna -" You're cut off by both Alpha's groaning, squeaking a little when you feel Bucky's cock twitch.

"You wanna touch our Alpha?" Bucky asks, kissing your forehead. "You can if you want. Touch him all you want."

"It's okay," Steve coos, shuffling forward until your hand is mere inches from his twitching cock. "Go ahead, honey. Touch me. Make me cum."

Even though it's phrased as an order, you know he's not demanding it; he'd never pressure you to do anything you don't feel fully comfortable with. And that's why you finally take his cock in your hand, positive that you want to make him feel good.

It takes no time at all before the base of Steve's cock grows, only allowing you to pump it a few times before the telltale signs of his orgasm crescendo into a full body shudder. He's clearly so worked up that he can barely last a minute with your hand on him, and it makes you feel like the luckiest Omega alive.

Bucky takes you by surprise when he wraps one arm around your back, steadying you against his torso while gripping one of Steve's ass cheeks in his wide palm, leaning forward and taking the tip of his dick in his mouth as soon as the first spurt of cum leaks out.

You're entranced by the sight of your Alpha swallowing your other Alpha's cum, and you're almost a little jealous that you're not tasting it, but the sight alone is enough to make you want to watch Bucky really suck Steve off. Images flash through your mind of them teaching you how to take them in your mouth, and you shiver at the thought but decide to keep it to yourself for the meantime.

Once everything is said and done and everyone is satisfied, Steve lays back against the headboard next to Bucky, taking your hand in his and kissing your knuckles. Yawning, you all chuckle a little, soothing hands rubbing your back and sides as your eyes start fluttering with the need for sleep overtaking your mind.

"Go to sleep, honey," Bucky whispers against the top of your head, tilting your head up so he can kiss your lips. "We'll talk in the morning."

"Okay," You whisper back, accepting Steve's kiss then resting your head against Bucky's chest once more. "I love you both," You murmur, your eyes shutting completely, letting the happiness settle into your bones and succumbing to the exhaustion.

"We love you too, Omega."

You fall asleep with a smile on your face, dreams filled with a little house and a home art studio, excited for the future.

-

m&h masterlist: @the-ginger-fairy-artist / @supernovatardis / @kandis-mom / @wandaneedstherapy / @bigcreatorwombatdreamer / @venusfly11 / @clownsbf / @matsumama / @thornsnvultures / @sadboiabby / @lily-excal / @alright-i-guesss / @blondie-bluue / @loveforreading / @marvel-wifey-86 / @wheezy-stucky / @exposition-belongs-somewhere / @stuckysbike / @starkblackwolf / @caitlink26 / @dreaming-potato / @emeraldfairy23 / @lethargicluv / @perfectlyboring / @monicachic13 / @akmenia / @hc-kerr / @iamfandomwasted / @wizardofstories / @emerald-writes / @matchat3a  / @mollygetssherlockcoffee / @normalgirlnextdoor / @lolitsbuckybarnes / @rippedpiece / @lauratang

main taglist: @lilyalone / @crazyunsexycool / @yeehawbrothers / @buckyssweetheart / @buckysprettybaby / @heytheredelulu / @ozwriterchick / @pxgeturner / @gentlelimerence  

[madamechrissy]

Baby You're No Good part three preview- spoilers if you haven't read part two!

Pairings - Cult leader/clan Leader Geto x F! reader

Warnings- just a whole bunch of angst (chap will be explicit and NSFW but this section isn't) say hi to Satoru hehe

Satoru pulls up his white wrapped blindfold, one cerulean eye meeting yours, swirling storms that you could never forget, looking back at Suguru, glossy lips turning up in a smirk. Suguru scowls right at him, when Satoru puts his hands in the pockets of his dark blue pants, tilting his silvery locks as he steps just a bit closer, his shoes glinting under the light with each step.

“A non-curse user married to the infamous Suguru Geto.” Satoru whistles now, walking closer until he’s right in front of you.

“Arranged marriage.” Suguru says, making you tense, feeling sick to your stomach, sure you know it’s true, but…

Perhaps you thought you were a little more?

“Ah, need me to take her off your hands?” Satoru taunts, grinning as he puts his blindfold back on, and you watch Suguru stiffen, before he glares.

“The fuck you say?”

“You hate humans, I’ll take her with me. Sure she’d prefer that over certain death, hmm?”

“You won’t take her any fucking where.”

“Why, it’s forced, right?” Satoru’s lilting voice was laced with sarcasm, as he looks right through Suguru, the way you do, the way Shoko had so casually the day he last saw her, the way only people…

People he loved did.

Fuck he can’t, he doesn’t, but as Satoru brushes your hair back gently and you eye him curiously, he grips one of Satoru’s wrists tightly, and he can feel the goddamn gaze behind that blindfold. Knowing, still caring somehow, though Suguru doesn’t deserve his care, nor does he deserve you.

If he loved you enough, he’d let you run the fuck away with Satoru, perhaps he could keep you safe, from the monster Suguru had become.

But he can’t stand the thought of you gone.

“Is it because she’s pregnant?”

“What!?” Suguru demands, and he lifts his blindfold again, eyeing you with those powerful six eyes, as you touch your tummy, looking at Satoru in shock.

“It’s brand new, won’t even show up on a test, but you are.” Satoru’s voice is just a little soft, you could feel how he felt horrible for you, but also you could still feel the love he had for his former best friend.

“You can see?” You murmur softly, as Suguru’s lips are parted.

“I can see a lot. I see you care about her, hmm?”

“You need to leave, to prepare for when I come.”

“Suguru!” His name on your lips makes him pause, as you look at him with tears now. “You can’t do it.”

“Oh I can’t hmm?” Suguru’s struggling to remember his motives, all he can think of is that there’s a fucking baby in you already.

“You can’t do this, what life will this baby even have?”

“A better one, when the scum is off this earth.”

“Including her?” Satoru says now, and Suguru’s jaw locks, violet eyes narrowed with his lashes casting shadows on his cheeks, the wind starts whipping around the three of you, as you feel Satoru’s immense energy. It’s far surpassing Suguru’s, intense to withhold as it surrounds him. “If you hate humans, you hate her.”

“That’s… she’s mine.”

“Your human?”

“She’s my…” He stands in front of you now, as Satoru grins, chuckling just a bit. “She’s my wife and has my heir, she won’t leave my fucking sight.”

Suguru never wants you to leave him, the thought makes his heart clench with fear, his very energy shifting, and Satoru picks up on it. “Oh so you’ll just kill her once she has your heir?”

“No I…”

“Why not?”

“Satoru fuckin' leave, go prepare now because I sure the fuck am coming prepared to kill everyone in that city, including you.”

Suguru stomps away, as Satoru sighs, stepping closer to you.

“You alright here?” He murmurs, you nod then, carefully. “I can get you out of here.”

“You what?” You blink just a bit, and Suguru is shouting your name, glaring at the two of you.

“You love him too, don’t you?”

“No! God no…” You falter, and Satoru exhales, brushing the backs of his fingers across your cheek, and you feel Suguru summon a curse right around you, making you gasp.

“Back the fuck off.” Suguru speaks through gritted teeth, Satoru just smirks, waving off Suguru’s curse like it’s nothing.

“You see them.”

“Yes, I can, some… family trait.” You murmur softly.

“Hmm, interesting. I can still take you away, just say the word.”

You hate Suguru.

Suguru is a psycho murderer.

Right?

“Or…”

“Or?” Suguru’s now got his people around him, his cult, his minions, making you sick as they gather, as if they’re putting a dent in Satoru Gojo.

“Or… you try to stop him.”

“Me!? He fucking hates me, he thinks-”

“Nah. He certainly doesn’t hate you, in fact… maybe only you can get through to him.” He rubs the back of his neck, as Suguru and his group start stepping forward. “I’ve tried, I’m… fucking tired.”

“If you don’t get through, how can I?”

“He feels something. Try to… just buy me some time could you?” You gulp now, as you touch your stomach again.

“I’ll try, Gojo.”

Coming this weekend <3

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